yea, i guess i don't write in here
i guess college isn't what it's cracked up to be... i came into college with a loving boyfriend, an amazing family, and a good amount of friends that i could turn to. what i expected out of college was a good amount of friends that i could party with on the weeknights and on the weekdays. roommates that i could share things with, and a family that didn't pressure me to come home all the time. maybe i expected to know what i wanted to get out of school from the get-go and maybe i expected something else...
but the thing is me and the boyfriend fight a lot and i can tell it's mostly because of the distance; and i know it's not that far away but it's far enough to be uncomfortable. and seeing him every weekend creates a gap in my social life at school...and that gap is made wider by the fact that my roommates don't go out on the weekends; and then theres a gap between me and my rom mates by the fact that i don't stay at school on the weekends doing nothing with them. and those couple best friends that i had from home don't like my relationship.
and maybe it's too serious, but i love him and i don't mind it, and maybe partying in frats and stuff like that isn't my thing, and maybe we've turned into a married couple...
i've lost most of my friends but i had nothing to do with my boyfriend but more to do with the fact that i guess you have to party with people to keep up with them.
i don't think i've turned into any worse of a person... i actually think that i've gotten to be a much better person. i don't know, i'm at odds between being an 18 year old and trying not to lose someone that means so much to me. i know that sounds dumb as all hell, but that's how i feel. i'm just frustrated with everything, and i'm not in my element wherever that is... maybe transferring isn't going to solve all my problems...i don't know. i'm confused right now. i wish i didn't have to choose between my best friends and my boyfriend. i wish i didnt have to choose between a lot of different things. im just gonna move to a secluded island and never talk to anyone again.
sounds like a plan.
gotta go to bed keeping roommate up is a bad idea
love.
but the thing is me and the boyfriend fight a lot and i can tell it's mostly because of the distance; and i know it's not that far away but it's far enough to be uncomfortable. and seeing him every weekend creates a gap in my social life at school...and that gap is made wider by the fact that my roommates don't go out on the weekends; and then theres a gap between me and my rom mates by the fact that i don't stay at school on the weekends doing nothing with them. and those couple best friends that i had from home don't like my relationship.
and maybe it's too serious, but i love him and i don't mind it, and maybe partying in frats and stuff like that isn't my thing, and maybe we've turned into a married couple...
i've lost most of my friends but i had nothing to do with my boyfriend but more to do with the fact that i guess you have to party with people to keep up with them.
i don't think i've turned into any worse of a person... i actually think that i've gotten to be a much better person. i don't know, i'm at odds between being an 18 year old and trying not to lose someone that means so much to me. i know that sounds dumb as all hell, but that's how i feel. i'm just frustrated with everything, and i'm not in my element wherever that is... maybe transferring isn't going to solve all my problems...i don't know. i'm confused right now. i wish i didn't have to choose between my best friends and my boyfriend. i wish i didnt have to choose between a lot of different things. im just gonna move to a secluded island and never talk to anyone again.
sounds like a plan.
gotta go to bed keeping roommate up is a bad idea
love.