Dad!
Ladies and gentlemen, I bring you further installments of extracts from letters from my father. This is my first ironic missive from him this term; I've missed them!
On school trips:
Leanna and I calculated that this must have been our eighth trip to France with our students. Back at base we get accused of going on "jollies". We don't care. If anyone questions our 'Media Field Study Visits', we just refer them to our annual A-level exam results, which are positively awesome. The fact that we are both Assistant Heads helps as well, of course. They can't argue with power and status. Ha!
As for this seemingly constant griping on the part of my own children that I never actually took them to Disneyland, well, I don't think it's a very suitable place for under-17s, to be honest.
On my trip to America:
Do I conclude, though, that the honoured confirmation of myself as a "third party" means I get an enormous bill if you decide to dip out at the last minute? Thank-you for that, daughter mine.
On university accommodation:
I suppose if we're paying again I would rather you get a flea-infested room in some scabby terraced house on Dale Street like I did. It would be a lot cheaper. However, I recognise the need of today's cosseted student to have her ensuite, central heating, with attached laundrette and fitness studio, so we'll go along with it.
How he signs off a letter:
Mickey Mouse was in court, filing for divorce against his wife, Minnie Mouse. "Mr Mouse", said the judge, "I hardly think that the fact that your wife has buck teeth is grounds for divorce." "I didn't say she had buck teeth, m'lud," replied Mickey, "I said she was fucking Goofy."
I'm always reminded about how much I miss him, whenever I read his letters. Still, I should be seeing him soon! I have to vacate my room over Easter (I have one of the nicer rooms which are used for conferences), and the only time he can come up north to collect my stuff is at the end of February - when term doesn't finish until mid-March. I need to start choosing what has to go back, and what I can live with for three weeks. Argh!
On school trips:
Leanna and I calculated that this must have been our eighth trip to France with our students. Back at base we get accused of going on "jollies". We don't care. If anyone questions our 'Media Field Study Visits', we just refer them to our annual A-level exam results, which are positively awesome. The fact that we are both Assistant Heads helps as well, of course. They can't argue with power and status. Ha!
As for this seemingly constant griping on the part of my own children that I never actually took them to Disneyland, well, I don't think it's a very suitable place for under-17s, to be honest.
On my trip to America:
Do I conclude, though, that the honoured confirmation of myself as a "third party" means I get an enormous bill if you decide to dip out at the last minute? Thank-you for that, daughter mine.
On university accommodation:
I suppose if we're paying again I would rather you get a flea-infested room in some scabby terraced house on Dale Street like I did. It would be a lot cheaper. However, I recognise the need of today's cosseted student to have her ensuite, central heating, with attached laundrette and fitness studio, so we'll go along with it.
How he signs off a letter:
Mickey Mouse was in court, filing for divorce against his wife, Minnie Mouse. "Mr Mouse", said the judge, "I hardly think that the fact that your wife has buck teeth is grounds for divorce." "I didn't say she had buck teeth, m'lud," replied Mickey, "I said she was fucking Goofy."
I'm always reminded about how much I miss him, whenever I read his letters. Still, I should be seeing him soon! I have to vacate my room over Easter (I have one of the nicer rooms which are used for conferences), and the only time he can come up north to collect my stuff is at the end of February - when term doesn't finish until mid-March. I need to start choosing what has to go back, and what I can live with for three weeks. Argh!