Garlic Knots, Jim/Dwight (non slash), PG-13
Title: Garlic Knots
Fandom: The Office (US)
Pairing/Character: Jim/Dwight
Rating: PG-13 for language
Summary: Jim and Dwight are in NYC for a conference and they get pizza together. Fun ensues.
Spoilers: None.
Author's Notes: This is my first Office fan fic. =)
Hope you enjoy =)
“What is that?”
“What is what?”
“That.”
“I uh believe it’s a garlic knot.” Jim pointed to the little card in front of the tray. “See there. Garlic. Knots.” He stood back and smiled in Dwight’s direction.
Dwight slowly lowered himself and leaned in, pressing his nose right against the glass and pointed directly at the garlic knots with his index finger.
“That is not a garlic knot. I believe that is a garlic twist.”
“Not…quite sure what the difference is…but okay.”
Dwight stood up straight now.
“Are you questioning my ability to tell the difference between a garlic twist and a garlic knot?”
Jim stepped back, hands up in mock defeat.
“No, no you’re the expert. I’m…just here for the pizza. That’s what we came to New York for right? The conference and pizza.”
Dwight nodded, one eyebrow lifted, observing Jim carefully.
“Yes. You’re right.”
Jim watched Dwight turn his back on him and adjust his glasses. Jim started whistling. The line was long. It was a nice day out but Pam had wanted to take a nap after their walk around Central Park. Jim had been hungry so he ventured out. It had seemed like such a good idea at the time. Dwight had been in the elevator on the way down to the lobby and Jim wondered what could possibly go wrong walking around New York City with Dwight.
And here they were.
“Ah yes please I would like two slices of the cheese and pepperoni pizza and two of the garlic…twists.”
“Ah garlic knots, two garlic knots!”
“No no Sir, I would like two of the garlic twists.”
The man behind the counter stopped, his pizza dough in mid twirl and eyed the man across from him. He motioned down to Dwight’s shirt.
“Coney Island huh? I have been there a thousand times, rode the roller coaster a million times.”
Dwight looked down at himself.
“Oh? I went. I only purchased this shirt. The Cyclone is a very dangerous ride you know.”
The man blinked at him.
Dwight looked around the tiny, crowded restaurant. He leaned across the counter slowly.
“Haven’t you heard? It’s completely unreliable. Many, many accidents have occurred on that ride since its installation.”
Jim for once paid no attention to Dwight and watched the man twirling the pizza instead. His face had pulled back, lines of defense forming around his eyes and mouth. Jim lowered his head and exhaled, hands pulled down inside the pockets of his jeans.
“What the fuck are you talking about? Are you---where the hell are you from anyway?”
Dwight didn’t miss a beat.
“Scranton.”
The man blinked.
“What the fuck is a Scranton?”
“Uh can I get a, two slices of cheese pizza please?” Jim stepped between the two men, separating himself from Dwight at the same time. The man nodded, giving Dwight one last warning look before returning to their order.
Jim looked over his shoulder.
“Be cool Dwight, come on.”
Dwight shook his head.
“These people need to understand the danger they are putting themselves in.”
“Okay. Okay.”
Dwight wiped his brow and looked around the room.
“I’ll have you know I didn’t sleep well last night. Hotel beds are full of bed bugs. Not to mention bad for your back. Hard as a rock.”
“You slept just fine. I heard you snoring in the next room.”
“Actually I usually sleep much more. I often times require twelve hours of sleep a night. I completely hibernate.”
Jim smirked. “Like a bear?”
“Exactly. I think I’m narcoleptic.”
Jim turned to Dwight with a puzzled expression.
“Really?” He seemed almost concerned.
“Yes…WAIT! NO! I didn’t mean that.”
“Didn’t mean what?”
Dwight’s eyes were wide.
“I do NOT sleep with dead people nor do I find them attractive.”
“Dead people…Dwight you said-”
“I know what I said.” Dwight’s voice lowered. “I said I suffer from…necrophilia. And I most certainly do not.”
“But you just said-”
“Oh I am very well aware of what I said Jim.”
Jim nodded.
“Alright Dwight. I won’t tell anyone if you don’t.”
Dwight nodded.
“Wanna make a pact?”
Jim shrugged.
“Why not?”
Dwight nodded down towards his hand.
“Pinky swear.”
Jim did as he was told. They locked and unlocked pinkies quickly.
“Hey you! Four eyes who fucks dead people, your order’s ready!”
Dwight winked at Jim and walked to the register.
“They have no idea,” He whispered.
Jim winked back.
“No idea at all."
Fandom: The Office (US)
Pairing/Character: Jim/Dwight
Rating: PG-13 for language
Summary: Jim and Dwight are in NYC for a conference and they get pizza together. Fun ensues.
Spoilers: None.
Author's Notes: This is my first Office fan fic. =)
Hope you enjoy =)
“What is that?”
“What is what?”
“That.”
“I uh believe it’s a garlic knot.” Jim pointed to the little card in front of the tray. “See there. Garlic. Knots.” He stood back and smiled in Dwight’s direction.
Dwight slowly lowered himself and leaned in, pressing his nose right against the glass and pointed directly at the garlic knots with his index finger.
“That is not a garlic knot. I believe that is a garlic twist.”
“Not…quite sure what the difference is…but okay.”
Dwight stood up straight now.
“Are you questioning my ability to tell the difference between a garlic twist and a garlic knot?”
Jim stepped back, hands up in mock defeat.
“No, no you’re the expert. I’m…just here for the pizza. That’s what we came to New York for right? The conference and pizza.”
Dwight nodded, one eyebrow lifted, observing Jim carefully.
“Yes. You’re right.”
Jim watched Dwight turn his back on him and adjust his glasses. Jim started whistling. The line was long. It was a nice day out but Pam had wanted to take a nap after their walk around Central Park. Jim had been hungry so he ventured out. It had seemed like such a good idea at the time. Dwight had been in the elevator on the way down to the lobby and Jim wondered what could possibly go wrong walking around New York City with Dwight.
And here they were.
“Ah yes please I would like two slices of the cheese and pepperoni pizza and two of the garlic…twists.”
“Ah garlic knots, two garlic knots!”
“No no Sir, I would like two of the garlic twists.”
The man behind the counter stopped, his pizza dough in mid twirl and eyed the man across from him. He motioned down to Dwight’s shirt.
“Coney Island huh? I have been there a thousand times, rode the roller coaster a million times.”
Dwight looked down at himself.
“Oh? I went. I only purchased this shirt. The Cyclone is a very dangerous ride you know.”
The man blinked at him.
Dwight looked around the tiny, crowded restaurant. He leaned across the counter slowly.
“Haven’t you heard? It’s completely unreliable. Many, many accidents have occurred on that ride since its installation.”
Jim for once paid no attention to Dwight and watched the man twirling the pizza instead. His face had pulled back, lines of defense forming around his eyes and mouth. Jim lowered his head and exhaled, hands pulled down inside the pockets of his jeans.
“What the fuck are you talking about? Are you---where the hell are you from anyway?”
Dwight didn’t miss a beat.
“Scranton.”
The man blinked.
“What the fuck is a Scranton?”
“Uh can I get a, two slices of cheese pizza please?” Jim stepped between the two men, separating himself from Dwight at the same time. The man nodded, giving Dwight one last warning look before returning to their order.
Jim looked over his shoulder.
“Be cool Dwight, come on.”
Dwight shook his head.
“These people need to understand the danger they are putting themselves in.”
“Okay. Okay.”
Dwight wiped his brow and looked around the room.
“I’ll have you know I didn’t sleep well last night. Hotel beds are full of bed bugs. Not to mention bad for your back. Hard as a rock.”
“You slept just fine. I heard you snoring in the next room.”
“Actually I usually sleep much more. I often times require twelve hours of sleep a night. I completely hibernate.”
Jim smirked. “Like a bear?”
“Exactly. I think I’m narcoleptic.”
Jim turned to Dwight with a puzzled expression.
“Really?” He seemed almost concerned.
“Yes…WAIT! NO! I didn’t mean that.”
“Didn’t mean what?”
Dwight’s eyes were wide.
“I do NOT sleep with dead people nor do I find them attractive.”
“Dead people…Dwight you said-”
“I know what I said.” Dwight’s voice lowered. “I said I suffer from…necrophilia. And I most certainly do not.”
“But you just said-”
“Oh I am very well aware of what I said Jim.”
Jim nodded.
“Alright Dwight. I won’t tell anyone if you don’t.”
Dwight nodded.
“Wanna make a pact?”
Jim shrugged.
“Why not?”
Dwight nodded down towards his hand.
“Pinky swear.”
Jim did as he was told. They locked and unlocked pinkies quickly.
“Hey you! Four eyes who fucks dead people, your order’s ready!”
Dwight winked at Jim and walked to the register.
“They have no idea,” He whispered.
Jim winked back.
“No idea at all."