Finally an update
I felt guilty not updating for all you lovely people. I think about it a lot, I really do, but there's just so much I get scared off. I'm going to forget a lot, and it's going to be a random entry, whenever something pops into my head, i'm putting it down. I'm listening to Fiddy Cent. It makes me happy
It gets lonely and depressing at night, lights off, people asleep, my eyes drooping. But that's the only time. When i'm with people, hell when the lights are on, I'm happy as a clam. Apparently clams are naturally happy, we talked about that at dinner tonight. We also talked about nipples and having breasts on loan to one's partner in a relationship. All semester we have not had a proper dinner conversation. We try, oh we do, but boobs come in a lot, or parents having sex. We torment my friend Greg by constantly mentioning that at that very moment, his parents are getting down and dirty. We also call him an "Enema fudge eating cum dumpster". Fine fine college education at work there.
But seriously, I love it here. I have some amazing friends who I can't say enough about. We've had some crazy experiences, lots of funny inside jokes. If there is one thing you all need for college I can tell you right now. Fuck SAT's grades, basically stuff you learn. Here it is: A sense of humor. It will get you farther than you ever thought. It seems there are two prerequisites to college. Owning a copy of Anchorman, and Family Guy. Every room has two copies of each, because everyone brings it. And those who have not scene either, or do not appreciate the comic genious behind them are outcasts. They are the ones who sit alone...I sit at a full table.
"So word around the office is you've got a fat cock" - Andrew. He's my bestest buddy here. I was chillin with Andrew and Greg and my girlfriend Jill. Jill was sitting down on a bench in front of me, next to Andrew. My friend Greg decided to pants me. He happened to get my boxers too. That's right, I decided to hang out with my wang out. Jill blinked, opened her eyes, and BAM penis. It was funny. Greg thought I was going to kill him, I just laughed. Then I pulled my pants back up.
It's stuff like that that I love. That was like 3 weeks into school. It's just so comfortable here. And i'm not going to lie. College is a fuckin' breaze. I wrote a research paper the morning it was due, bam, A-. Gotta love picking up your reasearch at 12:30 AM, getting some sleep, starting the paper around noon, getting lunch after 3 sentences, going back to work, chillin, going to class. Hopkins was seriously a bitch compared to college. I'm smarter than my Short Stories teacher. I realize I sound like an ass saying that, but it's true. She's a moron. I just wish I met her before she gave birth so I could rip out her ovaries, thus ending her bloodline. I guess retroactive abortions will have to do.
"I slit a man's throat today, cut like taught rope." - Andrew. Yea, it's great. We spank each other a lot. And lick. Oooooo the licking. We also torture Greg. He's not really accustomed to my lifestyle (i.e SEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEX) So we take him to the local porn shop, flood him with anal gape pictures, goatsee, tubgirl, the usual. He loves it, he just won't admit it. God college is fun.
And then there is the weekend. Got a sweet beer-amid in my room. Just need 24 more cans to finish it off....so I'll have it done in two days. I'll put some pictures up hopefully.
I enjoy sex. A lot. Often. My girlfriend does too. We enjoy it together. I don't mean to kiss and tell, but it's integral to understanding college. Let me give you an example of my day. 8:30 - Alarm. 9:45 - Get up for class at 10. Get back at 11. Shower, eat. Hang out with Jill (my baby). Class at 1. go back to my room, hang out. Class at 3 with Jill and Andrew. Spend the class E-mailing each other, with the occasional nod to the teacher so he thinks we are listening. Class at 4. Back to my room, depressed after another shit Short Stories class. Have Jill come cheer me up, I.E lock out my roomate, get down and dirty. That's pretty much a standard day. I love it, i'm not gonna lie.
I'm good too. Just thought I'd throw that out there.
Oh yea, for those of you who don't know, College is a great place to steal music. Not that I do. Because it's illegal. I just turned on my computer and happened to find 3000 new songs that I like, I don't know where they came from. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm sexy.
I'll do another update later, I apologize that this is so long.
It gets lonely and depressing at night, lights off, people asleep, my eyes drooping. But that's the only time. When i'm with people, hell when the lights are on, I'm happy as a clam. Apparently clams are naturally happy, we talked about that at dinner tonight. We also talked about nipples and having breasts on loan to one's partner in a relationship. All semester we have not had a proper dinner conversation. We try, oh we do, but boobs come in a lot, or parents having sex. We torment my friend Greg by constantly mentioning that at that very moment, his parents are getting down and dirty. We also call him an "Enema fudge eating cum dumpster". Fine fine college education at work there.
But seriously, I love it here. I have some amazing friends who I can't say enough about. We've had some crazy experiences, lots of funny inside jokes. If there is one thing you all need for college I can tell you right now. Fuck SAT's grades, basically stuff you learn. Here it is: A sense of humor. It will get you farther than you ever thought. It seems there are two prerequisites to college. Owning a copy of Anchorman, and Family Guy. Every room has two copies of each, because everyone brings it. And those who have not scene either, or do not appreciate the comic genious behind them are outcasts. They are the ones who sit alone...I sit at a full table.
"So word around the office is you've got a fat cock" - Andrew. He's my bestest buddy here. I was chillin with Andrew and Greg and my girlfriend Jill. Jill was sitting down on a bench in front of me, next to Andrew. My friend Greg decided to pants me. He happened to get my boxers too. That's right, I decided to hang out with my wang out. Jill blinked, opened her eyes, and BAM penis. It was funny. Greg thought I was going to kill him, I just laughed. Then I pulled my pants back up.
It's stuff like that that I love. That was like 3 weeks into school. It's just so comfortable here. And i'm not going to lie. College is a fuckin' breaze. I wrote a research paper the morning it was due, bam, A-. Gotta love picking up your reasearch at 12:30 AM, getting some sleep, starting the paper around noon, getting lunch after 3 sentences, going back to work, chillin, going to class. Hopkins was seriously a bitch compared to college. I'm smarter than my Short Stories teacher. I realize I sound like an ass saying that, but it's true. She's a moron. I just wish I met her before she gave birth so I could rip out her ovaries, thus ending her bloodline. I guess retroactive abortions will have to do.
"I slit a man's throat today, cut like taught rope." - Andrew. Yea, it's great. We spank each other a lot. And lick. Oooooo the licking. We also torture Greg. He's not really accustomed to my lifestyle (i.e SEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEX) So we take him to the local porn shop, flood him with anal gape pictures, goatsee, tubgirl, the usual. He loves it, he just won't admit it. God college is fun.
And then there is the weekend. Got a sweet beer-amid in my room. Just need 24 more cans to finish it off....so I'll have it done in two days. I'll put some pictures up hopefully.
I enjoy sex. A lot. Often. My girlfriend does too. We enjoy it together. I don't mean to kiss and tell, but it's integral to understanding college. Let me give you an example of my day. 8:30 - Alarm. 9:45 - Get up for class at 10. Get back at 11. Shower, eat. Hang out with Jill (my baby). Class at 1. go back to my room, hang out. Class at 3 with Jill and Andrew. Spend the class E-mailing each other, with the occasional nod to the teacher so he thinks we are listening. Class at 4. Back to my room, depressed after another shit Short Stories class. Have Jill come cheer me up, I.E lock out my roomate, get down and dirty. That's pretty much a standard day. I love it, i'm not gonna lie.
I'm good too. Just thought I'd throw that out there.
Oh yea, for those of you who don't know, College is a great place to steal music. Not that I do. Because it's illegal. I just turned on my computer and happened to find 3000 new songs that I like, I don't know where they came from. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm sexy.
I'll do another update later, I apologize that this is so long.