I like the sound of him.

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Diogenes of Sinope (c. 412BC - 323BC)

(stolen almost wholesale from Wikipedia)

Many anecdotes of Diogenes refer to his doglike behavior, and his praise of a dog's virtues. It is not known whether Diogenes was insulted with the epithet "doggish" and made a virtue of it, or whether he first took up the dog theme himself. The modern terms cynic and cynical may derive from the Greek word kynikos, the adjective form of kyon, meaning dog (the precise etymology of the words are not known).

Diogenes believed human beings live artificially and hypocritically and would do well to study the dog. Besides performing natural bodily functions in public without unease, a dog will eat anything, and make no fuss about where to sleep. Dogs live in the present without anxiety, and have no use for the pretensions of abstract philosophy. In addition to these virtues, dogs are thought to know instinctively who is friend and who is foe. Unlike human beings who either dupe others or are duped, dogs will give an honest bark at the truth.

Diogenes was a self-appointed "public scold" whose mission was to demonstrate to the most refined people in the world - the ancient Greeks - that civilization is regressive. He taught by living example that wisdom and happiness belong to the man who is independent of society. Diogenes scorned not only family and political social organization, but property rights and reputation.

The most shocking feature of his philosophy is his rejection of normal ideas about human decency. Performance artist, exhibitionist and philosopher, Diogenes is said to have eaten in the marketplace, peed on the man who insulted him, defecated in the ampitheatre, and pointed at people with his middle finger. Sympathizers considered him a devotee of reason and an exemplar of honesty. Detractors have said he was an obnoxious ragpicker and an offensive churl.

One of the most important anecdotes about Diogenes suggests that he was exiled from Sinope for "adulterating the coinage". In his new home, Athens, Diogenes' mission became the metaphorical adulterating/debasing the "coinage" of custom. Custom, he alleged, was the false coin of human morality. Instead of being troubled by what is really evil, people make a big fuss over what is merely conventionally evil. This distinction between nature ("physis") and custom ("nomos") is a favorite theme of ancient Greek philosophy, and one that Plato takes up in The Republic, in the legend of the Ring of Gyges.

The stories told of Diogenes illustrate the logical consistency of his character. He inured himself to the vicissitudes of weather by living in a tub belonging to the temple of Cybele. He destroyed the single wooden bowl he possessed on seeing a peasant boy drink from the hollow of his hands. When asked how to avoid the temptation to lust of the flesh, Diogenes began masturbating. When rebuked for doing so, he replied, "If only I could soothe my hunger by rubbing my belly."

He used to stroll through the Agora at full daylight with a torch (or, as legend sometimes has it, a lantern). When asked what he was doing, he would answer, "I am just looking for an honest man." Diogenes looked for an honest man, and reputedly found nothing but rascals and scoundrels.

At the Isthmian Games, he lectured to large audiences, who turned to him from his one-time teacher Antisthenes. It was, probably, at one of these festivals that he met Alexander the Great. The story goes that Alexander, thrilled to meet the famous philosopher (in his tub), asked if there was any favour he might do for him. Diogenes replied, "Stand out of my sunlight." Alexander still declared, "If I were not Alexander, then I should wish to be Diogenes." (In another account, Alexander found the philosopher rummaging through a pile of human bones. Diogenes explained, "I am searching for the bones of your father but cannot distinguish them from those of a slave.")

There are numerous accounts of Diogenes' death. He is alleged variously to have held his breath, to have become ill from eating raw octopus, and to have suffered an infected dog bite. When asked how he wished to be buried, he left instructions to be thrown outside the city wall so wild animals could feast on his body. When asked if he really wished this, he said, "Not at all, as long as you provide me with a stick to chase the creatures away!" At the end, Diogenes made fun of people's excessive concern with the "proper" treatment of the dead. The Corinthians erected to his memory a pillar on which rested a dog of Parian marble.

Diogenes in his tub.