(no subject)
If this journal existed in a physical sense, it would be buried in several inches of dust.
All the same, being nocturnal involves spending a lot of time in the company of one's own thoughts, and it seems somehow fitting to spell them out here. The transition is always strange at first. The world seems too quiet, too empty, and then too bright. Still, I've never regretted having to spend time with myself, even though lately I've spent most of that time watching tragic, gut-wrenching love stories. You know the kind. Titanic. Romeo & Juliet (with Leonardo DiCaprio and Claire Danes, obviously). Cold Mountain. The Moulin Rouge. At least, these are the ones I've been watching because these are the ones I have on hand. All of a sudden I can't get enough of Ewan McGreggor. I have no explanations for you.
I just finished watching Big Fish in my very cold room. I will always love that movie because, years ago, Alex bought it for me and taped a note on the front that said something to the effect of "This movie always makes me think of you. You're my girl in the blue dress." Embarrassingly sweet, isn't it? That's Pooch though, through and through.
I'm nervous about graduating and applying for a job, and potentially being rejected. Where is the goddamn nursing shortage? The hospital I most want to work at only has 8 openings in their new graduate program. Given the fact that it's the best hospital in this area and it's only a few blocks from UNH, it's going to be really competitive. We'll see. I'll give it a shot. I keep sling-shotting back and forth between knowing that I am perfectly capable of being an exceptional RN and feeling as if the past 6 years of nursing education were a colossal mistake. It's a very comfortable feeling, I swear. Not at all panic inducing.
....really.
Too late to turn back now anyways. I'm 278 hours away from being eligible to take the state exam. In 278 hours I could be an RN. I'm spending those hours on a cardiac telemetry floor trying to figure out how to interpret rhythm strips, which I am abysmal at.
At any rate, it's nice to be close enough now to dream of a post-college life. An apartment with Alex. with heat. and a functioning shower that is capable of maintaining temperature. Potted herbs. Income. Recreational reading. Moving to California. Soon.
I'm real close.
All the same, being nocturnal involves spending a lot of time in the company of one's own thoughts, and it seems somehow fitting to spell them out here. The transition is always strange at first. The world seems too quiet, too empty, and then too bright. Still, I've never regretted having to spend time with myself, even though lately I've spent most of that time watching tragic, gut-wrenching love stories. You know the kind. Titanic. Romeo & Juliet (with Leonardo DiCaprio and Claire Danes, obviously). Cold Mountain. The Moulin Rouge. At least, these are the ones I've been watching because these are the ones I have on hand. All of a sudden I can't get enough of Ewan McGreggor. I have no explanations for you.
I just finished watching Big Fish in my very cold room. I will always love that movie because, years ago, Alex bought it for me and taped a note on the front that said something to the effect of "This movie always makes me think of you. You're my girl in the blue dress." Embarrassingly sweet, isn't it? That's Pooch though, through and through.
I'm nervous about graduating and applying for a job, and potentially being rejected. Where is the goddamn nursing shortage? The hospital I most want to work at only has 8 openings in their new graduate program. Given the fact that it's the best hospital in this area and it's only a few blocks from UNH, it's going to be really competitive. We'll see. I'll give it a shot. I keep sling-shotting back and forth between knowing that I am perfectly capable of being an exceptional RN and feeling as if the past 6 years of nursing education were a colossal mistake. It's a very comfortable feeling, I swear. Not at all panic inducing.
....really.
Too late to turn back now anyways. I'm 278 hours away from being eligible to take the state exam. In 278 hours I could be an RN. I'm spending those hours on a cardiac telemetry floor trying to figure out how to interpret rhythm strips, which I am abysmal at.
At any rate, it's nice to be close enough now to dream of a post-college life. An apartment with Alex. with heat. and a functioning shower that is capable of maintaining temperature. Potted herbs. Income. Recreational reading. Moving to California. Soon.
I'm real close.