ouch...
Some may say that in order to be alive, you need many things, Friends, family, desire, oxygen, a brain, so on and so forth. Truth be told, all you need is a heartbeat. The heart keeps the blood flowing through your body, thus keeping you alive. The heart can be the center to personality, especially with reference to intuition, feeling, or emotion. The heart is symbolic to Love, which I have found out, is a very powerful thing. When you love something, you get feelings that are next to impossible to describe, but for some reason, it helps make your heart beat stronger and better. My point is, that it can help you feel alive.
My heart stopped beating, because I just recently found out that a person I cared about and loved so much, didn’t love me back. My heart was broken, shattered, ripped out, stepped on, chewed up, spit out, etc. I feel nothing; my stomach is in knots, nauseous, empty, and full all at the same time. I feel like a fool, and I feel used, and disgusting. She may say that she loved me, but if that were true, she wouldn’t have made some of the decisions she did. Now, I made a few mistakes in the relationship as well, but my actions would not have happened, had it had not been for hers. 90% of the arguments were because of her. I found out that she had been smoking cigarettes for close to two years, and hid it from me, and many other people. I started to get angry and upset with her, because I felt that she would not include me in her life. I was never invited to hang out or get to know her friends. The reason was because she was smoking and didn’t want me to find out, because she feared that I would break up with her. You would think that would be a sign. She also stated that it wasn’t just the cigarettes, it was that she felt that we should be able to have separate lives. A relationship is a commitment, and you have to make sacrifices. I started every argument, trying to let her know that I would like to be involved, and she did nothing. I was the one trying to have a relationship, and keep it from falling apart, and she did nothing to help me. All because of her nasty, disgusting addiction. I don’t even get the honor of being replaced by a human being; I get the honor of being replaced by a cigarette. She used her friends as a cover up, one in particular, and made up many lies to cover herself. I have done a lot of thinking, and I found out that, I didn’t hate her friend, I hated her. For two years, she led me to believe that things were okay, but they weren’t and she knew it, and what did she do to fix it? Not a damn thing. She is a terrible person. She is a terrible friend, terrible girlfriend, terrible wife, and a terrible daughter. I was so blind to pay attention to these little details; blind because of that crazy little thing they call Love.
I have talked to many people, and they are sorry for what has happened to me. Because of what has happened to me though, I may have never really seen what great friends I have, whether I talk to them every day or not. I am extremely thankful to have these people in my life, and this was really just a blessing in disguise.
I am a new person now, and I am starting over. I am buying lots of new things that I wasn’t able, and I have learned my lesson for my wronging in the relationship. She will not. Because, while I look and feel great in my new clothes, and new personality. She will look disgusting puffing on that cigarette. Giving herself cancer, a deeper voice, yellow teeth, bad lungs, nasty hands, wrinkles, and basically looking like white trash. Fuck you Angela Knowlton, for breaking my heart. Good luck with your life, cause at the rate you are treating it, you wont have it for long. I just feel bad for your parents though, because the next thing they spend on you wont be a wedding, it will be a funeral.
It's really over, you made your stand
You got me crying, as well as you planned
But when my loneliness is through, I'm gonna find another you
You take your sweaters
You take your time
You might have your reasons but you will never have my rhymes
I'm gonna sing my way away from blue
I'm gonna find another you
When I was your lover
No one else would do
If I'm forced to find another, I hope she looks like you
Yeah and she's nicer too
So go on baby
Make your little get away
My pride will keep me company
And you just gave yours all away
Now I'm gonna dress myself for two
Once for me and once for someone new
I'm gonna do some things you wouldn't let me do
Oh I'm gonna find another you
-John Mayer
My heart stopped beating, because I just recently found out that a person I cared about and loved so much, didn’t love me back. My heart was broken, shattered, ripped out, stepped on, chewed up, spit out, etc. I feel nothing; my stomach is in knots, nauseous, empty, and full all at the same time. I feel like a fool, and I feel used, and disgusting. She may say that she loved me, but if that were true, she wouldn’t have made some of the decisions she did. Now, I made a few mistakes in the relationship as well, but my actions would not have happened, had it had not been for hers. 90% of the arguments were because of her. I found out that she had been smoking cigarettes for close to two years, and hid it from me, and many other people. I started to get angry and upset with her, because I felt that she would not include me in her life. I was never invited to hang out or get to know her friends. The reason was because she was smoking and didn’t want me to find out, because she feared that I would break up with her. You would think that would be a sign. She also stated that it wasn’t just the cigarettes, it was that she felt that we should be able to have separate lives. A relationship is a commitment, and you have to make sacrifices. I started every argument, trying to let her know that I would like to be involved, and she did nothing. I was the one trying to have a relationship, and keep it from falling apart, and she did nothing to help me. All because of her nasty, disgusting addiction. I don’t even get the honor of being replaced by a human being; I get the honor of being replaced by a cigarette. She used her friends as a cover up, one in particular, and made up many lies to cover herself. I have done a lot of thinking, and I found out that, I didn’t hate her friend, I hated her. For two years, she led me to believe that things were okay, but they weren’t and she knew it, and what did she do to fix it? Not a damn thing. She is a terrible person. She is a terrible friend, terrible girlfriend, terrible wife, and a terrible daughter. I was so blind to pay attention to these little details; blind because of that crazy little thing they call Love.
I have talked to many people, and they are sorry for what has happened to me. Because of what has happened to me though, I may have never really seen what great friends I have, whether I talk to them every day or not. I am extremely thankful to have these people in my life, and this was really just a blessing in disguise.
I am a new person now, and I am starting over. I am buying lots of new things that I wasn’t able, and I have learned my lesson for my wronging in the relationship. She will not. Because, while I look and feel great in my new clothes, and new personality. She will look disgusting puffing on that cigarette. Giving herself cancer, a deeper voice, yellow teeth, bad lungs, nasty hands, wrinkles, and basically looking like white trash. Fuck you Angela Knowlton, for breaking my heart. Good luck with your life, cause at the rate you are treating it, you wont have it for long. I just feel bad for your parents though, because the next thing they spend on you wont be a wedding, it will be a funeral.
It's really over, you made your stand
You got me crying, as well as you planned
But when my loneliness is through, I'm gonna find another you
You take your sweaters
You take your time
You might have your reasons but you will never have my rhymes
I'm gonna sing my way away from blue
I'm gonna find another you
When I was your lover
No one else would do
If I'm forced to find another, I hope she looks like you
Yeah and she's nicer too
So go on baby
Make your little get away
My pride will keep me company
And you just gave yours all away
Now I'm gonna dress myself for two
Once for me and once for someone new
I'm gonna do some things you wouldn't let me do
Oh I'm gonna find another you
-John Mayer