(no subject)
Today was alright... went to classes... found out I made an 82 on my history test.. not too bad... came home and it was all rainy yay... layed in bed.. Natalie called and wanted to hang out.. so we went and got Becca.. went to the mall and my house and taco bell and putt-putt... came home and talked online for alittle bit to my good friend Joseph.. I miss him... so I went and layed in bed.. and I have had so much on my mind the past couple of months.. and I decided just to jot some of my thoughts down on here.. so lately I have been trying to figure out who is really my friend and I know its because I am very insecure. I don't know who is using me who talks about me behind my back.. who really likes me.. because of my past.. it tears me apart so much...I am very nervous about going off to college.. I just wish I had a friend going with me... I worry about leaving some people and what's going to happen to them. Especially Josh Salcich. He is like my little brother and the sad thing is I don't think he appreciates me what so ever.. nothing in my life is secure.. everything is changing...that is why its hard for me sometimes... the only thing I have is George and people don't understand that... and my parents want me to get rid of it cause I can't take him to college.. everyone talks about how high school was suppose to be great and how college is suppose to make you into what you become.. but I honestly havn't felt any of that... high school sucked ass.. why do people think I got out as quick as I could.. I am not going to Prom... and college doesn't look any better so far but I am just looking forward to going out and getting a job and finally becoming settled... who knows if that'll even happen.. I found a girl that I like but i'm not going to do anything about it cause I can't stand anymore pain... so why bother getting into a relationship for 4 months... why do people have to be so inconsiderate.. all most people care about now is getting trashed and partying.. life has more to offer and I am just sick of people. Well I guess we will just see how my graduation party goes... bbbbllllllaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh