To make a long story short, Satan spoke to me, and gave me a simple project to embark on. "Charles, my loyal and faithful servant," he said, "You must take the following innocuous, heartbreaking children's song about death:"
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"...and cover it
in the style of Type O Negative."
So let it be done. I will bring the Peter Steel-esque vocals and power bass, and I'm hoping that my sister will provide drums. I just need heavy guitars and weepy, gothic keyboards. who will help me realize my Master's bidding?