Oy
I need to be somewhere that is not SIU right now. I mean I love it here, but all the crap that's happened with Adam...I just...need to get away from the memories for right now. I need the summer.
I went out over the weekend with some people from my floor. I really, really hate how I can be surrounded by people who care about me, and I still feel so alone. I really let Adam get to me, and I don't feel stupid about it, because at the time it was great and worth it. Because of that, it's so much harder to just let things go for the time being. Neither of us is happy with having to ignore the other person...but I have to do this, so that things get better. On the other hand, I don't know if I want them to get better...I mean, I hate disliking someone, but he doesn't feel sorry for most of the shit he's said or done to me since we broke up. I need some kind of apology before anything changes from how it is right now.
Well, time to kill myself with school work and studying for finals and such.
I really hate most of my music right now....
I went out over the weekend with some people from my floor. I really, really hate how I can be surrounded by people who care about me, and I still feel so alone. I really let Adam get to me, and I don't feel stupid about it, because at the time it was great and worth it. Because of that, it's so much harder to just let things go for the time being. Neither of us is happy with having to ignore the other person...but I have to do this, so that things get better. On the other hand, I don't know if I want them to get better...I mean, I hate disliking someone, but he doesn't feel sorry for most of the shit he's said or done to me since we broke up. I need some kind of apology before anything changes from how it is right now.
Well, time to kill myself with school work and studying for finals and such.
I really hate most of my music right now....