If
If she had known what finding her family would cost her, Nadia thinks that she would still have been glad to have known them. She had spent her life wondering about them, and her parents most of all. She had spent so much time thinking of them, she had never imagined a sibling, or... She'd always thought that she would be lucky if she had one parent who cared for her, and somehow- for a time, at least- Nadia had three.
If she had never known them, her father could never have betrayed her. But she knows how little this really matters- if Sloane hadn't been able to, Elena still would have. Elena, who had always known who, and where, Nadia was... Elena, who had, it seemed, only been waiting for Nadia to grow up, so that she could...
Nadia wishes she didn't remember quite so much about Sovogda. The journey there, yes, when she had finally started to get to know her mother. Those hours she had spent on the plane with Sydney and Jack, and her mother, Irina- and Vaughn, whom they had all seen propose to Sydney. Her family. It had been enough, then, to have these people, and to know that all of them cared for her. It didn't do away with her father's betrayal, but it made it, somehow, less painful.
Those memories, she would keep, but what happened after- She'd rather not know that a woman she'd known all her life, and a man she had spent her life waiting to meet, had done this to her. That they'd tried to turn her against the others, and when she had defied them, had forced her to it.
Betrayed, as she'd been the first time, by a needle. It was only water, but it wasn't harmless. Not anymore.
She thinks sometimes that her father poisons everything that he touches.
As he had poisoned her.
She wishes she didn't remember the things that she couldn't stop herself from doing- fighting her sister, as prophecy had said she would, and as Nadia had sworn she never would.
She'd never believed in Rambaldi's nonsense, not really. He had been a madman ahead of his time, not a prophet- that, she had believed. But then there had been that sense of dread, and... She thinks now that somehow she should have known.
Now, when it's too late.
If she had believed... But she didn't. Because her father did, Nadia didn't. Rambaldi was religion and obsession to Arvin Sloane, and there was no sanity in either man. Nadia had known that.
She'd still given Sloane a second chance. She'd still wanted to know her father, to be able to trust him. To let him redeem himself.
She should have realized, that last night, when she and Jack followed Sloane, that she already did.
-
Nadia Santos
Alias
473 words
If she had never known them, her father could never have betrayed her. But she knows how little this really matters- if Sloane hadn't been able to, Elena still would have. Elena, who had always known who, and where, Nadia was... Elena, who had, it seemed, only been waiting for Nadia to grow up, so that she could...
Nadia wishes she didn't remember quite so much about Sovogda. The journey there, yes, when she had finally started to get to know her mother. Those hours she had spent on the plane with Sydney and Jack, and her mother, Irina- and Vaughn, whom they had all seen propose to Sydney. Her family. It had been enough, then, to have these people, and to know that all of them cared for her. It didn't do away with her father's betrayal, but it made it, somehow, less painful.
Those memories, she would keep, but what happened after- She'd rather not know that a woman she'd known all her life, and a man she had spent her life waiting to meet, had done this to her. That they'd tried to turn her against the others, and when she had defied them, had forced her to it.
Betrayed, as she'd been the first time, by a needle. It was only water, but it wasn't harmless. Not anymore.
She thinks sometimes that her father poisons everything that he touches.
As he had poisoned her.
She wishes she didn't remember the things that she couldn't stop herself from doing- fighting her sister, as prophecy had said she would, and as Nadia had sworn she never would.
She'd never believed in Rambaldi's nonsense, not really. He had been a madman ahead of his time, not a prophet- that, she had believed. But then there had been that sense of dread, and... She thinks now that somehow she should have known.
Now, when it's too late.
If she had believed... But she didn't. Because her father did, Nadia didn't. Rambaldi was religion and obsession to Arvin Sloane, and there was no sanity in either man. Nadia had known that.
She'd still given Sloane a second chance. She'd still wanted to know her father, to be able to trust him. To let him redeem himself.
She should have realized, that last night, when she and Jack followed Sloane, that she already did.
-
Nadia Santos
Alias
473 words