floating head
so tired today. exhausted for no reason other than the gimp condition. feel like i could sleep 3 days without stopping; then have trouble getting to sleep at all. so much going on my brain keeps buzzing. the lack of rest is taking its toll.
& this floating sensation will drive me nuts one of these days.
one would think you'd get used to it. but no. not really, not entirely. today ive been up since 6 o'clock. don't ask what ive done since. nothing. drift. read, unable to concentrate. skipped the planned outing. some online chat instead for good measure -- meh -- nothing but boring people today... now watching tish as she goes about her business.
sometimes i worry about her.
what about *her* life? why is she doing this job? caring for others with such devotion? i suspect trauma, something that goes way back. you'd never guess, interacting with her. shes so upbeat, seems happy, glad to be here, respected; appreciated. well, maybe that's just it. a tad *too* upbeat. as it often is the case. we're great friends & i love her. but... i still wonder & cannot just ask. and so, the mind constructs... i cant work today, nor create. feel so disconnected. from everything; everyone. fab was going to stop in later. i hope he does. i need something good.
& this floating sensation will drive me nuts one of these days.
one would think you'd get used to it. but no. not really, not entirely. today ive been up since 6 o'clock. don't ask what ive done since. nothing. drift. read, unable to concentrate. skipped the planned outing. some online chat instead for good measure -- meh -- nothing but boring people today... now watching tish as she goes about her business.
sometimes i worry about her.
what about *her* life? why is she doing this job? caring for others with such devotion? i suspect trauma, something that goes way back. you'd never guess, interacting with her. shes so upbeat, seems happy, glad to be here, respected; appreciated. well, maybe that's just it. a tad *too* upbeat. as it often is the case. we're great friends & i love her. but... i still wonder & cannot just ask. and so, the mind constructs... i cant work today, nor create. feel so disconnected. from everything; everyone. fab was going to stop in later. i hope he does. i need something good.