(no subject)
i'm going in to the doctor tomorrow to consult about what to do about my depression. i'm willing to try medication, but i won't settle for a kick out the door because i need answers. i'm also starting a sketchbook-- tomorrow hopefully, to track my *shudders* progress. i think it would be really theraputic to have a journal where i could write or draw and put music-- something i could pour myself into. the happy days i will write in pen, and the sad ones will be in pencil. i know i'm on my way. i'm so desparately excited to be started down this path. my friends are the most awesomest supportive people in the world, and i know that one day i'll see these first 19 years of my life as a sad phenomenon.
things with wes are going well. i told him that i don't want a boyfriend because i'm going through all this shiz and still getting over jon, which is becoming increasingly difficult because he will not leave me alone. i just want this summer to be about me without any messy, hurtful relationship entanglements that leave me more mad and confused when i've struggled my way through them. i'm trying to stick to my plan of being free and honest and to love myself. things with him are perfect as is, though he seems to be getting emotional on me, the ol' softie. i really like him and wish the timing weren't so tricky.
my mom said there might be a way that i could get a car!! it won't be real soon, but just the possibility has my FLYING. then my heart could be all over the country whenever i wish... i could go visit certain someones who get lonely in williamsburg, norfolk, richmond, durham, or reston! the possibilities are endless!
i worked 6 hours last week, so jeff and i had a talk about increasing my hours so that i make SOME money this summer. hypothetically it will be full time *rolls eyes*
i need a haircut.
my computer still isn't operational because dad hasn't sent it in yet... i should proly get on the horn about that.
the garage is coming along nicely, thanks to kla :-P soon i'll collect that big check and turn my attention to the basement.\
i'm buying a hookah ASAP because this whole theme this summer of small parties of rum and shisha are my flavor, and i want the good times to roll into next year.
things with wes are going well. i told him that i don't want a boyfriend because i'm going through all this shiz and still getting over jon, which is becoming increasingly difficult because he will not leave me alone. i just want this summer to be about me without any messy, hurtful relationship entanglements that leave me more mad and confused when i've struggled my way through them. i'm trying to stick to my plan of being free and honest and to love myself. things with him are perfect as is, though he seems to be getting emotional on me, the ol' softie. i really like him and wish the timing weren't so tricky.
my mom said there might be a way that i could get a car!! it won't be real soon, but just the possibility has my FLYING. then my heart could be all over the country whenever i wish... i could go visit certain someones who get lonely in williamsburg, norfolk, richmond, durham, or reston! the possibilities are endless!
i worked 6 hours last week, so jeff and i had a talk about increasing my hours so that i make SOME money this summer. hypothetically it will be full time *rolls eyes*
i need a haircut.
my computer still isn't operational because dad hasn't sent it in yet... i should proly get on the horn about that.
the garage is coming along nicely, thanks to kla :-P soon i'll collect that big check and turn my attention to the basement.\
i'm buying a hookah ASAP because this whole theme this summer of small parties of rum and shisha are my flavor, and i want the good times to roll into next year.