sometimes it makes me sick
right at the beginning of a boring history class and i figure that this is the only thing that i can do to amuse myself. fun fun. for some reason i think that i am a little sleepy although i do not see how that is possible considering that i got the amount of sleep i feel that i needed. maybe it is the fact the i was woken at least four times by random incidents (i.e. sunlight and i think it was a dumptruck) within about three hours. okay so maybe i am exageratting, but the night before last was the first time i went unwoken while i was at stony brook and i have to say that even so i was still tired yesterday during my poetry class. okay so class is starting...
and i am finishing this entry two days later, after getting my ass kicked, finally, in jade empire; oh man what a game. i almost have half a mind to get back on my xbox and play it some more. but no, i can stop myself i just need to calm myself a bit and hopefully and can do that by three in the morning. hehe. oh well.
i have also comes to terms with thinking about something or i am going to come to terms with it right now. cindy has told me after reading much about pete wentz (fall out boy) and his depression, that i am somewhat of an emulation of pete, more in personality than in depression of course. what i am trying to say is that i think pete really needs the right person to walk up to him right now and give him a spot of advice that he hasn't heard or that doesn't sound insincere despite others valiant efforts (i am sure of that). i keep on thinking, noblly, that i could be that person (or at least i would like to be). the point i am trying to make is that i think that if i were in his situation (while it could seem like an absolute treasure to most) is that i would be a bit overwhelmed and i would wonder who i was really trying to impress upon or what i was trying to achieve. i am sure that at the beginning of what fall out boy was and what pete was trying to say, he enjoyed the attention and thought it was amazing that he could have made it so far (because i know that pete did not expect to make it this far, i mean, who does). now despite that fact that he gets to express himself to the world all he is getting is worship and backlash and neither one suits his personality type. i imagine that he is feeling much like he cannot breathe and he is looking for a face in the crowd that might offer the solace he needs; either that or he needs to go home for a while, write, and hang out with his friends, and just his friends with no one to come up to him and say, "he your that hot guy from fall out boy, can you sign my boob?" now why pete torments himself with the backlash from everyday assholes, is honestly beyond me (but i do understand how it affects oneself; i have battle depression myself and a combination of writting and friends is really a healthy dose). honestly we all really need to give peter wentz, the human being, a metric assload of a hug. do not worry pete all is well just hang in there; those of us who understand are pulling for you the best we know how.
peace.love.nate.
and i am finishing this entry two days later, after getting my ass kicked, finally, in jade empire; oh man what a game. i almost have half a mind to get back on my xbox and play it some more. but no, i can stop myself i just need to calm myself a bit and hopefully and can do that by three in the morning. hehe. oh well.
i have also comes to terms with thinking about something or i am going to come to terms with it right now. cindy has told me after reading much about pete wentz (fall out boy) and his depression, that i am somewhat of an emulation of pete, more in personality than in depression of course. what i am trying to say is that i think pete really needs the right person to walk up to him right now and give him a spot of advice that he hasn't heard or that doesn't sound insincere despite others valiant efforts (i am sure of that). i keep on thinking, noblly, that i could be that person (or at least i would like to be). the point i am trying to make is that i think that if i were in his situation (while it could seem like an absolute treasure to most) is that i would be a bit overwhelmed and i would wonder who i was really trying to impress upon or what i was trying to achieve. i am sure that at the beginning of what fall out boy was and what pete was trying to say, he enjoyed the attention and thought it was amazing that he could have made it so far (because i know that pete did not expect to make it this far, i mean, who does). now despite that fact that he gets to express himself to the world all he is getting is worship and backlash and neither one suits his personality type. i imagine that he is feeling much like he cannot breathe and he is looking for a face in the crowd that might offer the solace he needs; either that or he needs to go home for a while, write, and hang out with his friends, and just his friends with no one to come up to him and say, "he your that hot guy from fall out boy, can you sign my boob?" now why pete torments himself with the backlash from everyday assholes, is honestly beyond me (but i do understand how it affects oneself; i have battle depression myself and a combination of writting and friends is really a healthy dose). honestly we all really need to give peter wentz, the human being, a metric assload of a hug. do not worry pete all is well just hang in there; those of us who understand are pulling for you the best we know how.
peace.love.nate.