But What About the Ducks?
The internal dialogues of a jet ski person (JSP) and a person who hates jet skis (PWHJS).
PWHJS: (Standing on the shore among the trees.) Sigh. It's so lovely on Long Lake this time of year. But what's that horrible noise? Damn! It's one of those jerk-off jetskiers.
JSP: (On the water.) Woo hoo! Yeah!
PWHJS: Stupid jetskis are a total menace.
JSP: Yeah! Yeah! Woo hoo!
PWHJS: Oh my god: Is that a mother duck and her ducklings trying to cross the lake?
JSP: I wonder if those babes over there on the dock have noticed me? Good thing I'm not wearing a shirt!
PWHJS: Go mama duck. Swim like the wind! Oh my god. That freaking idiot is going to hit them!
JSP: Hey girls! Look at me! I'm like the Laird Hamilton of Long Lake! Watch me pull this rad 360...
PWHJS: Thank goodness. He turned it just in time to miss the ducklings. I hate jetskis. I hate jetskis.
JSP: ---!! Check this out ladies!
PWHJS: Holy crap! That fool just knocked those little girls off the dock when he swiped it with his stupid jetski. That is just too Kelly and Justin for words. And now he's flipped it over. What an ass.
JSP: Oops. Ooof. I've got it up. Here I go, ladies! Check me out. I'm not wearing a shirt! Yeah! Oh yeah! Woo hoo
PWHJS: (Standing on the shore among the trees.) Sigh. It's so lovely on Long Lake this time of year. But what's that horrible noise? Damn! It's one of those jerk-off jetskiers.
JSP: (On the water.) Woo hoo! Yeah!
PWHJS: Stupid jetskis are a total menace.
JSP: Yeah! Yeah! Woo hoo!
PWHJS: Oh my god: Is that a mother duck and her ducklings trying to cross the lake?
JSP: I wonder if those babes over there on the dock have noticed me? Good thing I'm not wearing a shirt!
PWHJS: Go mama duck. Swim like the wind! Oh my god. That freaking idiot is going to hit them!
JSP: Hey girls! Look at me! I'm like the Laird Hamilton of Long Lake! Watch me pull this rad 360...
PWHJS: Thank goodness. He turned it just in time to miss the ducklings. I hate jetskis. I hate jetskis.
JSP: ---!! Check this out ladies!
PWHJS: Holy crap! That fool just knocked those little girls off the dock when he swiped it with his stupid jetski. That is just too Kelly and Justin for words. And now he's flipped it over. What an ass.
JSP: Oops. Ooof. I've got it up. Here I go, ladies! Check me out. I'm not wearing a shirt! Yeah! Oh yeah! Woo hoo