:I should'a thought of that before we kissed:
Wow. You know, I have a fuckin break down and it just keeps on coming. Not only am I in the shit house with mum but Dev is everly pissed at me. Kalisa and I had a big conversation yesterday about people not bein able to keep their mouth shut, look what fucking happened. Im not manipulative. Im not. Just fucking listen for once. Lokk at what you are doing to us, you are tearing us apart. You are my best friend, but I was enlightening her as to what I knew and you knew that I knew about it because I told you that i knew. You could have asked me not to say anything. I know that I should have thought about it before I said it and for that Im sorry. But dev you really can't do this. Youre killing me inside. But, I guess you really don't care, it's always about someone else. Because Im not good enough, IM NEVER FUCKING GOOD ENOUGH! I never have been and I never will be. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt you, I didn't mean to and I dont want you to be mad at me.
When we kissed I asked you not to tell anyone. But you did. You told Blake. How could you, I trusted you, but you misused it and told her, I didnt want anyone to know because I knew it would hurt someone. Like Kalisa, like youre sisters. God knows Im always looking out for other people, I almost never look out for myself. And look where it got me. Broken hearted and you hating me. And Im sorry if telling Kalisa hurt her, or you ,I never wanted that, you know that that is the last thing that I wanted to do. If you didn't want me, you could have just told me instaed of making me wait and hold out for you while you were making out with my best fucking friend, and Then I would have to find out from her and not you. That kills me. Im sorry, Im not good, Im just the fucking tragic little hero who was never good enough for anyone. Im sorry for ruining everything devin I just want you not to be mad at me. I want everyhting back to normal. I never meant to do what you acused me of. Im not manipulative, yes I maybe lonesome and pathetic, but I didnt make myself that way, someone else did.
When we kissed I asked you not to tell anyone. But you did. You told Blake. How could you, I trusted you, but you misused it and told her, I didnt want anyone to know because I knew it would hurt someone. Like Kalisa, like youre sisters. God knows Im always looking out for other people, I almost never look out for myself. And look where it got me. Broken hearted and you hating me. And Im sorry if telling Kalisa hurt her, or you ,I never wanted that, you know that that is the last thing that I wanted to do. If you didn't want me, you could have just told me instaed of making me wait and hold out for you while you were making out with my best fucking friend, and Then I would have to find out from her and not you. That kills me. Im sorry, Im not good, Im just the fucking tragic little hero who was never good enough for anyone. Im sorry for ruining everything devin I just want you not to be mad at me. I want everyhting back to normal. I never meant to do what you acused me of. Im not manipulative, yes I maybe lonesome and pathetic, but I didnt make myself that way, someone else did.