Help! I Created a Monster! 1/2
Title; Help! I've Created a Monster
Characters/Pairing; Mayuri, OC
Rating; PG-13 for language and gore.
Warning(s); Crack!fic. Maybe a few spoilers for Soul Society Arc, gross OOCness and lack of respect for readers' sanity.
Summary; Mayuri for the first time ever, decides to take a day off. In which there is an experiment, a result and a slight problem concerning molasses and a hairy monster...
Notes; Beware when Mayuri has free time. Good GACKT, please forgive me for this one.
Kurotsuchi Mayuri was in a bit of a bind. A sticky situation, he might have said, although at this present moment in time, he found it rather difficult to speak. Or breathe for that matter. The combined stench of sickly unrefined sugar and hairy monster smell was getting to him considerably after the fifty minutes they had now been stuck together for.
He peered up at the giant hairy thing, which only a few hours ago had been nothing more than another mad glint in his eye. He struggled almost heroically to unstick his previously white captain's haori from the depths of the hairy, sugary mass and failed, eventually resorting to wondering whether this was how he was finally going to die. Where Quincy arrows had failed, molasses and fur were now going to end it all.
The monster stirred a little and its eye turned to Mayuri adoringly.
‘MAMA,’ it rumbled. Mayuri sighed in defeat and decided just to sit there and wait for rescue in whatever form.
This was not how it was supposed to have worked out...
Five Hours Earlier Than The Present...
Having the day off was something as alien to him as expressing any kind of paternal affection towards Nemu. However, in the cleanup after the big fuss over the fifth, third and ninth division captains respectively and figuratively (though who knew with Ichimaru Gin anyway) giving the finger to Soul Society, the higher ups were trying to 'boost morale amongst the troops' as rumour called it. And so various shinigami in the higher ranks were on leave when they weren't needed and this had eventually fallen on his shoulders.
It was all a damn waste of time if anybody asked him. Which they weren’t, considering his reputation as possibly one of the weirdest captains (or shinigami for that matter) around. Mayuri, the genius that he was, just thought they were intimidated by his brilliance.
He supposed, thinking about it when the order had been handed to him, that it wasn’t such a bad idea. Considering he did have a few new experiments he had been saving for a rainy day, he supposed that this was a good a time as any to get a couple of them started. There was one in particular he had been dying to try out.
Several days before he was issued leave, by the Twelfth Division captain’s order, some members of the research institute had picked up some samples from the mortal world; a few bits of road kill here and there, nothing that would cause a major disturbance but interesting enough to go into his rather gory (and growing) collection of dead things floating in pickle jars. Mayuri, always having been one to improve on things that had been broken, or as in this case, dead, and of course, this being Mayuri and his obsession with weird, creep, albeit insanely powerful things, this was too good of an opportunity to pass up.
And lo! The electrodes were dusted off and the twelfth division captain got to work.
Three Hours Earlier Than The Present...
Shinigami all over Seiretei, (although perhaps not those who spent a lot of time in the general vicinity of the twelfth division headquarters) were more than a little surprised when a freak storm suddenly appeared and proceeded to throw fork lightning down on a localised area, namely, Mayuri’s lab. This lasted for all of ten seconds and then the bolts disappeared as suddenly as they had come, leaving some very dazed shinigami blinking light spots from their vision and trying not to bump into any walls as they staggered about, reeling from the shock.
Afraid of an experiment gone horribly wrong for their captain, some of the research institute staff plus Nemu, rushed onto the scene, only to find a slightly blackened, smoking and triumphantly grinning Mayuri hunched over a mass of bright purple, wriggling fur.
‘He doesn’t seem to be the worse for wear…’ Akon surmised. Nemu nodded, still a little worried-looking. The thing on the table seemed to be growing and emitting squeaking noises as it did. The twelfth division captain was still grinning like a loon, an aura of absolute pride filling the air around him. He seemed to be muttering something.
‘Sorry, Mayuri-sama…?’ Nemu stepped forward a little, trying to hear whether or not he was giving her an order.
‘IT’S ALIIIIIIVE!! ‘ The vice-captain jumped as her father’s shout split the air, and gave way to mad cackling. The squeaking noises were getting louder and Akon looked apprehensively at the furball. It had now pretty much swallowed the entire lab table and …was that a arm forming?
‘Uh, taichou…’
Mayuri whirled round. ‘What is it now?’
Akon pointed to his feet where a tendril of fur had snaked itself round his captain’s body, unnoticed while he had been cackling, entwining itself around his ankles. Making a small noise of annoyance, Mayuri moved to detangle himself but before he could lift one foot from the mess, the creature suddenly rose up to its full height and grabbed the captain with a fully formed hand, holding him high above what passed for a head. A single yellow eye with a red pupil glared at them from the middle of the purple fur.
‘Taichou!’ The braver members of the institute rushed forward but the thing waved Mayuri higher over their heads, evading all their attempts at cutting him down. Shrieking quite inelegantly, Mayuri shouted at them to back off.
‘NO, YOU FOOLS! GET BACK!’ He turned his face so he could shout at the creature. ‘Y-YOU PURPLE…THING! PUT ME DOWN AT ONCE! I AM YOUR MASTER! I CREATED YOU! AAAAAAGH!’
‘Mayuri-sama!’ Nemu shouted from below. ‘What are your orders?’
‘STAY. BACK. YOU IDIOT. CAN’T YOU SEE I’M HANDLING IT?’ Nemu nodded her head in acquiescence and shouted confirmation back up to her father.
‘Hai, Mayuri-sama!’
As if to prove how well the twelfth division captain was ‘handling the situation’, the creature chose that moment to blow a hole in the side of the wall of the lab and jumped through it, still with Mayuri in its furry clutches into the blackness beyond.
For a few moments there was nothing but deathly silence in the newly refurbished lab. They listened to their captain’s fading shrieks echo away until there was nothing but the sound of their breathing left. A freak tumbleweed drifted by. Then Akon walked forward until he could put his head through the hole and take a look around.
‘The sewer system,’ he remarked plainly. Nemu turned to a technician. ‘Please get Unohana-taichou.’
Next time: The Fourth Division get called in for help! Mayuri finds himself in it up to the neck! Will he be rescued?
More notes: Agh, there’s no decent words to express to you how much I fail at life. XD; I’ve already started art two of this so there should be little to no problem in updating. My Death Note fic, ‘Of Dreams’ part two is almost ready too, people who were waiting for that on kiranoutopia.
Reviews are love.
Characters/Pairing; Mayuri, OC
Rating; PG-13 for language and gore.
Warning(s); Crack!fic. Maybe a few spoilers for Soul Society Arc, gross OOCness and lack of respect for readers' sanity.
Summary; Mayuri for the first time ever, decides to take a day off. In which there is an experiment, a result and a slight problem concerning molasses and a hairy monster...
Notes; Beware when Mayuri has free time. Good GACKT, please forgive me for this one.
Kurotsuchi Mayuri was in a bit of a bind. A sticky situation, he might have said, although at this present moment in time, he found it rather difficult to speak. Or breathe for that matter. The combined stench of sickly unrefined sugar and hairy monster smell was getting to him considerably after the fifty minutes they had now been stuck together for.
He peered up at the giant hairy thing, which only a few hours ago had been nothing more than another mad glint in his eye. He struggled almost heroically to unstick his previously white captain's haori from the depths of the hairy, sugary mass and failed, eventually resorting to wondering whether this was how he was finally going to die. Where Quincy arrows had failed, molasses and fur were now going to end it all.
The monster stirred a little and its eye turned to Mayuri adoringly.
‘MAMA,’ it rumbled. Mayuri sighed in defeat and decided just to sit there and wait for rescue in whatever form.
This was not how it was supposed to have worked out...
Five Hours Earlier Than The Present...
Having the day off was something as alien to him as expressing any kind of paternal affection towards Nemu. However, in the cleanup after the big fuss over the fifth, third and ninth division captains respectively and figuratively (though who knew with Ichimaru Gin anyway) giving the finger to Soul Society, the higher ups were trying to 'boost morale amongst the troops' as rumour called it. And so various shinigami in the higher ranks were on leave when they weren't needed and this had eventually fallen on his shoulders.
It was all a damn waste of time if anybody asked him. Which they weren’t, considering his reputation as possibly one of the weirdest captains (or shinigami for that matter) around. Mayuri, the genius that he was, just thought they were intimidated by his brilliance.
He supposed, thinking about it when the order had been handed to him, that it wasn’t such a bad idea. Considering he did have a few new experiments he had been saving for a rainy day, he supposed that this was a good a time as any to get a couple of them started. There was one in particular he had been dying to try out.
Several days before he was issued leave, by the Twelfth Division captain’s order, some members of the research institute had picked up some samples from the mortal world; a few bits of road kill here and there, nothing that would cause a major disturbance but interesting enough to go into his rather gory (and growing) collection of dead things floating in pickle jars. Mayuri, always having been one to improve on things that had been broken, or as in this case, dead, and of course, this being Mayuri and his obsession with weird, creep, albeit insanely powerful things, this was too good of an opportunity to pass up.
And lo! The electrodes were dusted off and the twelfth division captain got to work.
Three Hours Earlier Than The Present...
Shinigami all over Seiretei, (although perhaps not those who spent a lot of time in the general vicinity of the twelfth division headquarters) were more than a little surprised when a freak storm suddenly appeared and proceeded to throw fork lightning down on a localised area, namely, Mayuri’s lab. This lasted for all of ten seconds and then the bolts disappeared as suddenly as they had come, leaving some very dazed shinigami blinking light spots from their vision and trying not to bump into any walls as they staggered about, reeling from the shock.
Afraid of an experiment gone horribly wrong for their captain, some of the research institute staff plus Nemu, rushed onto the scene, only to find a slightly blackened, smoking and triumphantly grinning Mayuri hunched over a mass of bright purple, wriggling fur.
‘He doesn’t seem to be the worse for wear…’ Akon surmised. Nemu nodded, still a little worried-looking. The thing on the table seemed to be growing and emitting squeaking noises as it did. The twelfth division captain was still grinning like a loon, an aura of absolute pride filling the air around him. He seemed to be muttering something.
‘Sorry, Mayuri-sama…?’ Nemu stepped forward a little, trying to hear whether or not he was giving her an order.
‘IT’S ALIIIIIIVE!! ‘ The vice-captain jumped as her father’s shout split the air, and gave way to mad cackling. The squeaking noises were getting louder and Akon looked apprehensively at the furball. It had now pretty much swallowed the entire lab table and …was that a arm forming?
‘Uh, taichou…’
Mayuri whirled round. ‘What is it now?’
Akon pointed to his feet where a tendril of fur had snaked itself round his captain’s body, unnoticed while he had been cackling, entwining itself around his ankles. Making a small noise of annoyance, Mayuri moved to detangle himself but before he could lift one foot from the mess, the creature suddenly rose up to its full height and grabbed the captain with a fully formed hand, holding him high above what passed for a head. A single yellow eye with a red pupil glared at them from the middle of the purple fur.
‘Taichou!’ The braver members of the institute rushed forward but the thing waved Mayuri higher over their heads, evading all their attempts at cutting him down. Shrieking quite inelegantly, Mayuri shouted at them to back off.
‘NO, YOU FOOLS! GET BACK!’ He turned his face so he could shout at the creature. ‘Y-YOU PURPLE…THING! PUT ME DOWN AT ONCE! I AM YOUR MASTER! I CREATED YOU! AAAAAAGH!’
‘Mayuri-sama!’ Nemu shouted from below. ‘What are your orders?’
‘STAY. BACK. YOU IDIOT. CAN’T YOU SEE I’M HANDLING IT?’ Nemu nodded her head in acquiescence and shouted confirmation back up to her father.
‘Hai, Mayuri-sama!’
As if to prove how well the twelfth division captain was ‘handling the situation’, the creature chose that moment to blow a hole in the side of the wall of the lab and jumped through it, still with Mayuri in its furry clutches into the blackness beyond.
For a few moments there was nothing but deathly silence in the newly refurbished lab. They listened to their captain’s fading shrieks echo away until there was nothing but the sound of their breathing left. A freak tumbleweed drifted by. Then Akon walked forward until he could put his head through the hole and take a look around.
‘The sewer system,’ he remarked plainly. Nemu turned to a technician. ‘Please get Unohana-taichou.’
Next time: The Fourth Division get called in for help! Mayuri finds himself in it up to the neck! Will he be rescued?
More notes: Agh, there’s no decent words to express to you how much I fail at life. XD; I’ve already started art two of this so there should be little to no problem in updating. My Death Note fic, ‘Of Dreams’ part two is almost ready too, people who were waiting for that on kiranoutopia.
Reviews are love.