Chapter 55: An End & A Beginning

[theladyholl]

Author: TheLadyHoll
Pairing: Andy/Miranda
Rating: M
Disclaimer: Yes, they are mine. I own them. Come to me my pretties and dance, DANCE I SAY. Or, more truthfully, not...



Also, I've started a new job (Me repeating: I love my job, I love my job) that is taking all my (admittedly limited) concentration. So apologies for the wait, but know not a day goes by that I'm not 'plotting' new plots. I hope what I put forth is worth the wait I've caused you. So as ever, thank you. Now, where were we? OH yes, that's right I left THE Miranda Priestly in labour. I'm so fired.

Previously...

"Please Dr. Jansen, my son..."

Cont'd.

"He looks good, really good. We're going to take him for some tests to determine overall heart function and get a clearer picture of any damage, but you saw he's crying and breathing on his own so that's a really good sign."

Dr. Jansen was feeling Miranda's belly now, knowing that a smooth transition between the births given the babies, and Miranda's for that matter, precarious condition, was vital. As was common in twin births, Miranda had 'undilated' slightly following the delivery of the first twin so that they would have to wait for her to progress once more to ten centimetres from the eight she was currently measuring.

With the first baby being looked after by the NICU team at the opposite end of the room and Dr. Jansen there to deliver Miranda, Andy once again took up her position behind Miranda, supporting the exhausted, overwrought form as it was once more taken over by a powerful set of contractions.

"Miranda! You need to breathe when you push, you can't hold your breath like that. Come on now, deep breath in with your nose, and I want you to blow out slowly or hum or vocalize so the air flow is steady, okay?"

Miranda understood perfectly what the doctor was saying, and the reasons behind her giving the instruction. But there was some block between her brain and her body and she continued the gasping breaths, almost hyperventilating until she was lightheaded and close to passing out, the shrill tones of the blood pressure monitor going off insistently as the numbers climbed.

"Andy, you've got to do something, the oxygen mask isn't cutting it. Try and calm her down - just remember, she's exhausted and in pain and she's not going to be thinking logically."

Despite being terrified out of her wits, Andy was careful to keep her voice light so as not to panic the older woman. "Since when has Miranda Priestly's brain ever been considered logical? She demands miracles on a daily basis," Andy teased, addressing the doctor even as she turned her head to capture Miranda's gaze and keep it, evenly, as she spoke. But then she leaned in to the older woman and entwined their hands, bringing them to rest on her belly above the monitor bands. "But now you're the one who's bringing two miracles into the world, and you're the only one who can do it. And we both know you can do it. Besides…" her features broke into a brilliant smile. "You can do anything, right?"

Miranda wasn't sure how the younger woman was able joke to given the circumstances, but she was helpless against the choking laugh that escaped between the gasps and that seemingly was enough to break the rhythm of hyperventilation and she was able to take deeper breaths with Andrea smoothing back her uncomfortably damp hair so that it didn't touch her face, offering ice chips to soothe her swollen throat and moving closer onto the bed behind her to support her body as Miranda gratefully let her weight fall back against the younger woman who so faithfully dabbed at her forehead with the cold cloth and let it rest over her burning eyelids and wiping it over her collarbone to refresh her.

Dr. Jansen nodded in approval as she watched the numbers on the monitor go down. "Good, good Miranda. Keep it up, your blood pressure's going back down and the babies' ox-sats are looking better. Are you ready to try pushing again with the next contraction?"

Still focusing on her breathing and on Andrea's voice gently coaching her, Miranda nodded, closing her eyes to gather her strength before the next pains enveloped her and took away her senses.

All too soon, her brief respite reached its end. Miranda gripped her thighs tightly, trying desperately not to think of the trauma of her daughters' births as she gave a long, hard push - feeling her nails dig in to and pierce the skin.

"Good, Miranda, good." Dr. Jansen encouraged her patient from where she stood at the foot of the bed. "I need to put a little bit of counter pressure on the head to make sure you won't tear, okay? So you're just feeling my fingers down there. I promise Andy can still catch the baby if that's what you both want.

"No!" Miranda surprised both women by shaking her head violently. "No," Miranda insisted again breathlessly, "Andrea, I want Andrea's hands to be the first thing our children feel when they come into this world."

Now it was Andy's turn to lose it a little, tears spilling freshly down her own cheeks as she kissed Miranda.

Knowing it was Andrea who would welcome their children into the world, Miranda gathered her strength and steeled herself to push again despite her growing exhaustion. She bore down again with renewed strength, visualizing delivering her baby and moving her closer to Andrea's waiting hands.

She had fought so long and so hard to keep these babies in and safe inside of her that she could only bear to release them into Andrea's arms. It wasn't something she would ever admit aloud, knowing it held little logic, but to herself she admitted that was the only way she could let go of them and could let her body do the work it needed to do to deliver them.

And then she felt it. She didn't know how she knew after so many hours in labour, but Miranda instantly felt the change in her body and knew that this was it. Pushing her heels as hard against the rough, plastic stirrups as humanly possible, Miranda took one last breath and began to bear down in a final push, the pressure so overwhelming that it even transcended her pain so that all she registered was the pressure inside of her. And so she pushed and she pushed with that contraction until that pressure reached a screaming crescendo that all but shattered Miranda's lungs as she directed every ounce of strength and every trembling muscle into delivering her daughter.

Careful not to interfere with the process or touch the exceedingly sensitive flesh, Andy's hands were surprisingly steady as they waited to catch their daughter, emerging so beautifully from Miranda's body, first by head, and then the minute relief of the neck before the shoulders squeezed through one by one and slipped free of the narrow passage. Although the baby girl was much smaller than her sibling, her birth seemed to take longer and demand more physically from Miranda, though the quick, almost violent birth of their son could perhaps have been part of the cause as the spent muscles now struggled to regather and work with the same strength.

"Ah, ah, ah!" Miranda's voice raised in pitch as the next round of contractions helped to ease the baby from her womb in short, little surges that saw more of the torso appear inch by inch. Spent beyond measure, and hands still clutching firmly underneath her thighs, Miranda held her body up, a final choked out sob and gasp as she strained - a final push bringing their daughter fully out of her womb and into the world.

"Is, is she all right?" wheezed Miranda, unable to sit up from where she had collapsed back against the pillows after the last push, all her energies being focused on drawing in one breath after the other so that she didn't pass out as lights appeared to pop and flash before her eyes.

"Please," Miranda's voice cracked, and after quickly glancing over at the doctor, who nodded her go-ahead, Andy moved forward on the bed and lay the messy bundle she was cradling carefully in her arms on top of Miranda's belly.

Blinking away the spots, Miranda could only stare down at her daughter, barely registering the tear damp lips that pressed themselves to her forehead, murmuring "You did so good."

Andy's arms encircled her as she eased herself onto the bed behind Miranda, helping her to hold their tiny, squalling daughter.

She couldn't believe how small the little girl was, although she was so perfectly formed. Worried that the little body would get chilled, Miranda quickly undid one of her bra straps so that she could hold the baby against her chest for the skin to skin warmth, looking up again and registering Andrea and the others' presence as a warmed receiving blanket was gently placed around the baby girl and Miranda quickly re-adjusted her hold, her breath catching as she watched a tearful Andrea cut the final physical bond she had with her daughter and the cord tied off.

It was over. Her babies were out, she had done it. They were here, and with everything considered, they appeared remarkably healthy, although she had yet to receive word back on her son, and her daughter was as yet uncleared.

The squeaking, snuffling sounds of the newborn against her chest brought Miranda's mind back to the present, and she looked around in some confusion for Andrea, who had left again after gently settling her back against the pillows when a blue blanket came into sight as the younger woman returned with a second squeaking bundle.

"Oh"

"There we are now," Andy resumed her place on the bed, making sure both babies were in Miranda's sight as she beamingly took in the exultant expression on Miranda's face, not knowing if she had ever seen it as such before as it took in the two new precious faces with every bit of careful and exacting scrutiny its owner was known and renowned for.

"Ohh, princess, look how tiny you are…and all these months you've been the one beating up mommy." Andy was perched on the side of the bed, facing Miranda and reached out to gently brush her finger against the little one's hand curled up against her chest from where she was nestled between Miranda's breasts.

Miranda gave a half-laugh, half-sob as she tilted her head back, trying not to let her tears fall on the baby's skin and chill her more. A nurse was approaching now to take the new addition and clean her up and do the same preliminary rundown of tests and bloodwork they had just performed on her brother and a third physical ache bloomed in her chest as her daughter was lifted out of her arms, just as painful as the aches between her legs or in her abdomen as she watched as her baby was taken away from her.

Now that her arms were empty again, Miranda's eyes immediately went to her son once more, eager for the reunion although the hours since she had last and first held him had been rather full with her second labour and delivery.

Andy saw this and instantly moved in so that Miranda could reach for their son without strain.

Miranda brushed her lips against the other baby's forehead. "Hello, my little prince. You're going to be the man of the house now, although your sisters may have something to say about that."

Miranda let her eyes flutter closed as she felt the tiny heart beat next to hers and she sent a silent prayer of thanks God had seen fit for them to be delivered safely, with no apparent major surgical intervention or applications needed.

While the babies were both back in their incubators and being readied to be taken to the NICU, Dr. Jansen came back over to the bedside and began to feel Miranda's belly, pressing against the still rounded sides and causing an uncomfortable pressure that felt almost like another contraction.

Oh, Miranda shut her eyes and grimaced as she realized her ordeal wasn't quite over. There was still the afterbirth to deliver.

Both hands still pressed into Miranda's belly, Dr. Jansen seemed satisfied when the organ beneath her fingertips began to contract on its own, hardening until it resembled a deflated ball of muscle and sinew that once more drew downwards and out of her belly. Checking Miranda internally to make sure everything was progressing as it should and the placenta was detaching normally, Dr. Jansen then nodded to the second attending obstetrician before addressing Miranda once more, a gloved hand resting on the older woman's elevated knee.

"I'm gonna run down to the NICU with the babies and see that they're started on their treatments and tests okay, and then I'll be back to check on you, alright? Chances are, by the time I get back you'll have passed the afterbirth already and we can get you all fixed up. There's only one tear that's going to require stitches, and it sounds like that was a result of baby A's expedient delivery."

Miranda nodded at the unsure looking younger woman. "Andrea, you don't need to bear witness to this. Go with them," Miranda instructed the brunette as she exhaled deeply and ran her fingers over her stomach, feeling the organ beneath turn from convex to concave beneath her fingertips. Thankfully now unattended in this moment of utter and abhorrent unpleasantness, Miranda groaned and shut her eyes tightly, panting again as the contraction worked to dislodge the fused placenta from her womb. Her legs still in position for the birth, she felt a heaviness and familiar pressure at the entrance of her body that brought on the urge to push. Before she could bear down for more than a second though, the room blurred and dimmed, fading quickly to black and then nothingness within the space of a second.

Andy had left Miranda's side at her request to see Dr. Jansen off with the incubators as she went with the babies to the NICU for a full postpartum workup. In addition to the TTTS, they were also still considered premature and therefore warranted additional monitoring for the first night or so even if they passed all the tests.

Already rife with separation anxiety the moment the babies were out of her sight, Andy turned around as she heard a familiar voice give a hoarse gasp and then it seemed like every monitor lit up and chimed and chirped and beeped. Andy was by Miranda's side almost instantly, panicking, her voice shrill as she wasn't able to wake the older woman. Looking over her body in wide-eyed panic, Andy registered a wetness under her hand and lifted the folded sheet covering Miranda's hips for modesty to find the linens soaked with blood, spreading to the sides of the mattress where Andy's hand had been resting.

"Please! Someone!" Andy looked around wildly, pleading even as every RN in the room began pulling off the sheets and calling for different doses of drugs Andy had never even heard of to be injected into her IV.

Andy could only watch in horror, her own stomach rising into her throat as she watched the second attending doctor press his hands into the swollen remnants of Miranda's belly, kneading the flesh so hard she was sure it would bruise and digging meaty hands into the fragile body of her love, making it seem as though he was forcing more blood out of her body.

Dr. Jansen jogged in through the door, presumably having run straight from the NICU where she'd been with the babies when her pager had gone off and took over from the resident.

"Come on Miranda," the older woman muttered as her gaze travelled quickly between the shrilly beeping monitor and the lifeless white of her patient's face.

"Goddammit, Miranda!"

Andy could only watch from her position at the head of the bed as a team of white lab coats swarmed around the precious body that was being pulled from Andy's arms and hooked up to a fresh IV and an oxygen mask shoved haphazardly over her face.

Andy felt the body next to her shudder and a dark clotted mass slide out from between Miranda's stirruped legs that was quickly gathered up by the nurses and examined for completeness until it was signalled to Dr. Jansen that the organ was whole and that nothing was left inside that could cause infection. Despite the alarming surge of crimson that had washed over the mattress as the afterbirth was delivered, the atmosphere of the room seemed to have calmed as far as Andy's own panicked, feverish mind was able to decipher through the veil of terror that had descended when Miranda had lost consciousness.

Sure enough, the beeping of the monitors slowed, returning to normal levels along with some slight colour in the cheeks of the editor. Blue eyes, bloodshot from the broken blood vessels she had burst while pushing, opened once more. Andy opened her mouth to speak, but closed it again as a hysterical sob escaped her lips and she slid down the wall until she hit the floor beside the bed, knees pulled to her chest and head bowed as awful, painful sobs forced their way from her lungs in an alarming succession.

"Andy," Dr. Jansen was kneeling in front of her now, taking the younger woman gently by the hands. But all Andy could see were the bloodstains on her scrubs - blood that had come from Miranda, blood that wasn't SUPPOSED to have come from Miranda.

"Andy, Andy it's over. I know it looked scary for a moment but Miranda's going to be fine, I swear. The babies are going to be fine. Everyone is okay. You did it, it's over…But Miranda and those babies still need you so you can't go losing it on me now."

"Andrea." In a voice that was so weak it was nearly indistinguishable as hers, Miranda spoke the younger woman's name.

"They're okay. They're in the NICU."

"Why aren't you with them?"

Andy stared blankly at the older woman from where she was still seated on the floor. "Are you insane? Miranda you almost DIED, you were hemorrhaging!" Her voice caught again, "there was so much blood. There was so much blood…" Andy's eyes were haunted as she stared past Miranda to the pile of blood-stained linen that was being separated into laundry carts.

"But you heard the doctor, I'm fine," Miranda grimaced as pain shot through her body from the simple act of speaking. "I will be fine. Go, go to our children, Andrea. I promise I'll be here when you get back."

"You can't promise me that," Andy whispered, rising up onto her knees and resting her fingers against a still ashen cheek. "Don't promise me that, Miranda, because I'll hate you if you're wrong," Andy parroted back the editor's words from months before when she had tried to reassure Miranda after the initial TTS diagnosis.

Miranda's eyelids were so heavy and she was quickly losing the battle to keep them open. Andrea saw this and quickly brushed her lips across the older woman's forehead before taking a last long look at the beeping monitors that only moments before had signalled disaster. This time however was different, and her eyes were only closed in sleep.

Andy's attention switched to the babies and she started down the hallway again, this time actually making it to the NICU. Already, the babies were hooked up to monitors in their individual incubators and Andy's gaze flicked over them watchfully before landing on the two precious faces that were already burned into her consciousness.

"Hi guys." She whispered, looking from one to the other and then back again. "You did so good. Your mom and I are so proud of you. You're little fighters, just like your mom." Andy's heart felt as though it had swelled too large for her chest. "We're so glad you're here. Your mom and I love you so much. She went through so much to get you guys here. And you have two big sisters who are going to love you. Do you remember how they read Harry Potter to you while you were still in mommy's tummy?"

"It certainly seems like they're coming in to this world with a lot of people rooting for them." Dr. Jansen's voice came from behind Andy as the two women stared silently at the incubators for a few long moments. "There's something I need to speak to you and Miranda about."

No. No, no, no. Andy's stomach rolled. Whatever this was wasn't going to be good. The fine lines around the doctor's eyes were tense even though she kept her tone light and conversational. But between being a journalist and being with Miranda, Andy had become an expert at knowing when someone was hiding something. She half hoped Miranda was still sleeping so that they could put this off. But of course, the moment the two women entered the room her eyes opened. Bloodshot and tired, her gaze was still piercing as she felt the strained atmosphere.

"What? What is it?"

"Miranda…Andy," Dr. Jansen sighed heavily, shaking her head ever so slightly as if to clear it before continuing.

"Even with the complications and Miranda's postpartum bleed, the birth went better than I had hoped. We didn't need to resort to surgery and both babies were born breathing."

"But." Miranda's voice was low and hoarse but threatening.

"There are several factors we need to discuss before deciding how to proceed with treatment. As you know, Baby A had been receiving a surplus of blood because of the Twin to Twin Transfusion. I'm still waiting on the results of the x-ray, but when I listened to his heart I could hear an arrhythmia.

Miranda's bloodless grip on Andrea's hand faltered.

"What does this mean?"

"Depending on the extent of the damage the MRI shows, we may need to perform exploratory surgery to know what additional procedures are needed. It may be that the arrhythmia is masking additional symptoms."

"Can't you simply find them with the MRI? Why do you have to cut into a newborn's chest only to go in again at a later date. Surely the number of surgeries should be limited given his size and condition."

"I never like to perform surgeries on babies this young, but if his heart is as bad as I think it is, it's only going to be the first in a long line of surgeries waiting for him."

Tears had started to leak from Andy's eyes but Miranda stayed strong, holding the doctor's gaze until she had seen enough to know that this woman was telling the truth about her son's fragile condition.

"I want to see him."

"Miranda, we can't move him out of the NICU, it's too risky."

Miranda gazed at the doctor for another long moment.

"Fine. Take me to him then."

"Miranda, we can't move the bed into the NICU."

"If that is the case, I'll simply go to him."

Andrea finally found her voice, "Miranda, sweetheart, you can't see him right now. You just gave birth. It's too risky for you."

"Nonsense," Miranda sniffed, "I'll be fine."

Miranda edged out of the bed, heavily supported by an extremely protective Andy and gingerly moved her legs off the mattress, displeased to find them shaky and weak like the rest of her."

"Miranda, I have to advise against this."

"If I am to understand that it is impossible to move one of these godawful contraptions into the confined space of the neonatal intensive care unit where my children are currently located and are unable to leave, then I am left with no other choice."

Even weak as she was from childbirth, there was a light and a strength that had returned to the editor that Andrea couldn't remember seeing since before the pregnancy. It was back and evidently, so was she.

BOOM! Oh, but we are FAR far from over for staying with me this long. And yes, this will end, the former was simply for dramatics...XO