Horseshoes and hand gernades...
So lately I have been changing...
I really fucked up my life, and that kinda opened my eyes to a lot of things..Things I really dont want to talk about on lj...
On Tuesday night I went to the fair with my dad and stepmom....I had sucha shitty time there...I pretty much just walked around for 2 hours doing nothing....What a waste of a 15 dollar wrist band! Joe Serra, Justin Demarco, Sarah Justin and a couple other people were there as well...I chatted with them a little bit...The only person there I really cared to talk to, I got some bad vibes off of.We Walked around a little bit, but I got the feeling that I annoyed her or something, and that was only confirmed when she just walked away from me without saying goodbye or anything and left with her friends to go on a ride..Shes a really cool person and friend but it sucks to know that shes not interested in anything more, I felt I could really talk to her, maybe one day I'll find someone who thinks I'm special too.... I also saw a lot of the drama people there, It was as if every time I turned around there they were.....Everytime it killed me just a little more....I dont know how I'm gonna go back to school...I am burdened with a veil of shame with those people who once called me their friend, I look at them and I see how big of a piece of shit I am.
So tomorrow my dad is gonna let me have a night of freedom, kind of a trial run to see if i'm gonna get arrested if I breath fresh air again....I wanna go to a party and not party for once...maybe getting a 3rd person perspective might put a new light on things. Idk, but I dont feel like writing anymore.....Feel free to get ahold of me and make some plans!
Later
I really fucked up my life, and that kinda opened my eyes to a lot of things..Things I really dont want to talk about on lj...
On Tuesday night I went to the fair with my dad and stepmom....I had sucha shitty time there...I pretty much just walked around for 2 hours doing nothing....What a waste of a 15 dollar wrist band! Joe Serra, Justin Demarco, Sarah Justin and a couple other people were there as well...I chatted with them a little bit...The only person there I really cared to talk to, I got some bad vibes off of.We Walked around a little bit, but I got the feeling that I annoyed her or something, and that was only confirmed when she just walked away from me without saying goodbye or anything and left with her friends to go on a ride..Shes a really cool person and friend but it sucks to know that shes not interested in anything more, I felt I could really talk to her, maybe one day I'll find someone who thinks I'm special too.... I also saw a lot of the drama people there, It was as if every time I turned around there they were.....Everytime it killed me just a little more....I dont know how I'm gonna go back to school...I am burdened with a veil of shame with those people who once called me their friend, I look at them and I see how big of a piece of shit I am.
So tomorrow my dad is gonna let me have a night of freedom, kind of a trial run to see if i'm gonna get arrested if I breath fresh air again....I wanna go to a party and not party for once...maybe getting a 3rd person perspective might put a new light on things. Idk, but I dont feel like writing anymore.....Feel free to get ahold of me and make some plans!
Later