love is a fragile word
it's not unusual for lauren and i to scratch, bite, and smack each other at various times (i'm not really the scratcher or biter). a few days ago a fight escalated far past where it normally would, including eye gouging, stomping on broken feet, and hitting. all bullshitting aside, i reacted in a very unmanly and redneck way and lauren ended up getting a mild concussion from me hitting her in her ear. when i heard about her going to the hospital the next day because she was throwing up and felt horrible, i figured it couldn't have anything to do with me. i couldn't imagine how an open-handed hit could cause that much damage, but then i think about it and i'm probably double lauren's strength.
let's add in the fact i've got drunk three days in a row like it was no big deal, but tonight i've spent all night in excrutiating pain because of my stomach ulcer. she was right, drinking won't just make things go away.
i don't think at any point in my life i've ever felt this low or this similar to my dad. five years ago if someone would have told me where my life would be, i wouldn't have believed them. i seem to have lost all convictions i've ever had and am permanently just looking for some escape - music, drugs, money. for the first time in my life i think i'm realising that i need to just deal with all the issues that've plagued me since i was young. if i don't, i'm even more likely to end up exactly like my dad.
the only plus of all of this is i haven't shot up.
AND I HAVE THIS SICK ASS FADE FROM NO GREASE.
let's add in the fact i've got drunk three days in a row like it was no big deal, but tonight i've spent all night in excrutiating pain because of my stomach ulcer. she was right, drinking won't just make things go away.
i don't think at any point in my life i've ever felt this low or this similar to my dad. five years ago if someone would have told me where my life would be, i wouldn't have believed them. i seem to have lost all convictions i've ever had and am permanently just looking for some escape - music, drugs, money. for the first time in my life i think i'm realising that i need to just deal with all the issues that've plagued me since i was young. if i don't, i'm even more likely to end up exactly like my dad.
the only plus of all of this is i haven't shot up.
AND I HAVE THIS SICK ASS FADE FROM NO GREASE.