(no subject)
“No.”
“You’ve got to give me more than a no, that’s not good enough.”
“It’s all you’re getting so…” she trailed off with a shrug.
I took a moment to study her face, the hard lines suddenly became very noticeable, as did the cruelty of the harsh grimace that was supposed to pass for a neutral expression. Until that moment I honestly didn’t realise how little she cared. And little is an exaggeration because she didn’t care at all. Not one single iota. Feeling sorry for myself didn’t help, but the feeling came natural and I didn’t fight it.
“Don’t look at me like I’ve kicked your puppy,” she chastised me, the cold smile still on that cruel face.
My own lips pressed firmly together, forcing my mouth shut and trying to quell the anger that bubbled inside my throat as a suppressed growl. She clearly was an idiot and my emotions were wasted on her. Still they were hard to swallow and scatter.
She looked at me, a grey and emotionless gaze meant to do…what? What did she want from me that wasn’t already hers?
“Fuck you,” I ended up telling her, my tongue overriding propriety. Then again if my current situation didn’t call for a curse word or two then I don’t know what does.
“Nice,” she grimaced. “Way to make yourself sound like a child.”
She was always so superior, or at least she thought she was. I gritted my teeth, imagining the sound carried and echoed between the housed facades surrounding us. Several snap, crude and harsh replies bounced around my mind, skimmed across my tongue, but for both our sakes fortunately managed to remain unspoken, but not by much.
“I’ll see you around,” she told me. I wasn’t sure whether it was a threat or a statement, or even my own wishful thinking. She gave me one last meaningful look, but I remained mute. I had a lot of things to say, but I didn’t know where to start, my thoughts too clouded and caught up in surprise and anger. Everything was a blur of hot and hard emotions. So I kept quiet. She continued to look at me for another second or a minute, I couldn’t tell time. Not in that moment at least. Then she turned slowly and walked away.
I didn’t watch her. I stared down at my shoes, mindlessly watching the frayed shoelaces and the dirty once white All Stars. Standing there like a fool, lost in thought only to be reawakened as a stranger jostled by and accidentally bumped into my shoulder.
A mumbled and distorted “sorry” carried across the white noise of a busy city and caught my ears long after the stranger had hurried past.
“You’ve got to give me more than a no, that’s not good enough.”
“It’s all you’re getting so…” she trailed off with a shrug.
I took a moment to study her face, the hard lines suddenly became very noticeable, as did the cruelty of the harsh grimace that was supposed to pass for a neutral expression. Until that moment I honestly didn’t realise how little she cared. And little is an exaggeration because she didn’t care at all. Not one single iota. Feeling sorry for myself didn’t help, but the feeling came natural and I didn’t fight it.
“Don’t look at me like I’ve kicked your puppy,” she chastised me, the cold smile still on that cruel face.
My own lips pressed firmly together, forcing my mouth shut and trying to quell the anger that bubbled inside my throat as a suppressed growl. She clearly was an idiot and my emotions were wasted on her. Still they were hard to swallow and scatter.
She looked at me, a grey and emotionless gaze meant to do…what? What did she want from me that wasn’t already hers?
“Fuck you,” I ended up telling her, my tongue overriding propriety. Then again if my current situation didn’t call for a curse word or two then I don’t know what does.
“Nice,” she grimaced. “Way to make yourself sound like a child.”
She was always so superior, or at least she thought she was. I gritted my teeth, imagining the sound carried and echoed between the housed facades surrounding us. Several snap, crude and harsh replies bounced around my mind, skimmed across my tongue, but for both our sakes fortunately managed to remain unspoken, but not by much.
“I’ll see you around,” she told me. I wasn’t sure whether it was a threat or a statement, or even my own wishful thinking. She gave me one last meaningful look, but I remained mute. I had a lot of things to say, but I didn’t know where to start, my thoughts too clouded and caught up in surprise and anger. Everything was a blur of hot and hard emotions. So I kept quiet. She continued to look at me for another second or a minute, I couldn’t tell time. Not in that moment at least. Then she turned slowly and walked away.
I didn’t watch her. I stared down at my shoes, mindlessly watching the frayed shoelaces and the dirty once white All Stars. Standing there like a fool, lost in thought only to be reawakened as a stranger jostled by and accidentally bumped into my shoulder.
A mumbled and distorted “sorry” carried across the white noise of a busy city and caught my ears long after the stranger had hurried past.