justprompts: Perspective
After this. If anyone wants to call him/run into them later that evening, feel free to tag, etc.
Caleb waited till his friend had taken off on the bike before he started back home. He even smiled as he watched man and machine whiz off in a synchrony that felt right. Or that he had gotten so used to that it was as good as. Either way, Pogue's way to blow off some of the steam from the last couple of days looked good to him.
His own drive home wasn't anywhere near that releasing. More like careful and contained; he'd been doing careful and contained ever since Chase managed to bring him into that kind of low boil for the first time. The jerk hadn't even done it on purpose, he didn't think, not judging by what he'd said afterwards.
Which means the problem isn't Chase, doesn't it. It's you.
He snorted quietly. Chase had beaten him up pretty good, by sheer brute force; since he'd come back, he'd gotten him tired, drained, confused, and a little scared, for his friends - but the only reasons for him to end up curled up, half-paralyzed with... being overwhelmed? Was himself. His thoughts, his emotions. The power coursing through his veins, tempting, taunting, breath-taking and deadly. Memories, fears...
The bike wreck, broken bones and ...
Chase had been talking about what he'd felt. But he'd thrown it towards Pogue, eyes ... something. As though it had been Pogue's fault. Or something like that. And Caleb had wanted to smash his face in, almost as bad as after he'd pulled that one on Ginny.
Idiot.
Yeah. He was.
He pulled into the driveway, into the garage. Went inside. His mother was reading; he neared her seat and kissed her cheek, a small smile returning at the absence of the once-too-familiar scent of alcohol. Some days, it was there again. More, it wasn't there. That was good.
Caleb wanted to hide, let himself really calm down. Figure it out, do research. Something.
Instead, he found himself asking his mother if she wanted to dine out. He had as good as promised Pogue he would make sure to eat, and closing up in his room ran the risk of skipping again; and it would, he knew, bring her joy. Make somebody gladder, with so very little effort, and no strings attached. He could do that, and the idea of something like that brought a bit of... soothing.
Evelyn smiled and agreed; Caleb smiled and said he'd be out on the grounds for a bit, until it was time for that. She said she'd be ready; he did go back outside for a walk.
He didn't wander for long. The sun's reflection from one of the upstairs windows caught his eye, and he only barely thought about it. Just enough to look around, out of habit. Then powered up, and leaped up on the rooftop. It wasn't anything that would register with the rest, too little and too short and too harmless for that. But he felt it.
By the time his feet thunked on the tiles, he was laughing. At himself, for consciously indulging, a bit. But mostly at the sheer joy of this.
Magic. It burned away the anger from his veins. He turned back to look upon the vista that opened up from this vantage point, breathing deep, even the scent different through the crackling of power.
Another breath, and he very, very deliberately focused and. let. go. Released the power completely.
It left him gasping and shivering in the wind, yearning to reach back for it, sink into it and stay there.
But he didn't.
He stood there until he'd caught his breath, until he'd caught back his control. Then walked around the roof, then sat, back against one of the chimneys, looking over the grounds.
Letting the silence, the peace seep into him.
Letting his mind drift. Away and around the issues and person who'd gotten him all worked up. Letting his eye drift, over the drying green of later summer; over the murky reflected sunlight from the lake.
Right here and now, he didn't have to try to be there for anybody, in any - straightforward or twisted - way. Right here and now, he wasn't weighing down on anybody, no matter how willing they were to take up that burden when he needed it.
It was an odd perspective, but in a good way.
He sat there, letting himself not think for a long time. Until the setting sun was bringing out the promise of coming fall in the maples. Until sitting in the shade, in the wind, got him to feel the boiling heat of earlier leave him to a cool calm, more than skin-deep.
When he stood, he stretched a bit. Then carefully made his way to the trapdoor down into the attic and let himself in, not even needing or reaching for a single trickle of magic. Came downstairs to his room; dialed Sarah's number and left a message so that she wouldn't worry, since she might worry, and he didn't want that. Took a shower and changed, then came downstairs.
His mother was ready.
He took her to her favorite restaurant. They both knew whom they would meet there; what topic would be discussed. What they would have - and he had to admit, it was nice; she always did have good taste.
Simple, effortless by now. One of his father's old associates reminded him he was coming of age in less than a month; Caleb and his mother looked at each other, and laughed a little, properly as surprised, not ridiculing the acquaintance, of course. When left to their own, they talked about that.
There didn't seem to be any spikes of magic use coming from anywhere around him. He was glad.
Tonight was simple. Maybe the problems weren't all solved, and it was likely to get even worse before it got any better?
But he could use the rest.
And it was also good, anyway.
Caleb waited till his friend had taken off on the bike before he started back home. He even smiled as he watched man and machine whiz off in a synchrony that felt right. Or that he had gotten so used to that it was as good as. Either way, Pogue's way to blow off some of the steam from the last couple of days looked good to him.
His own drive home wasn't anywhere near that releasing. More like careful and contained; he'd been doing careful and contained ever since Chase managed to bring him into that kind of low boil for the first time. The jerk hadn't even done it on purpose, he didn't think, not judging by what he'd said afterwards.
Which means the problem isn't Chase, doesn't it. It's you.
He snorted quietly. Chase had beaten him up pretty good, by sheer brute force; since he'd come back, he'd gotten him tired, drained, confused, and a little scared, for his friends - but the only reasons for him to end up curled up, half-paralyzed with... being overwhelmed? Was himself. His thoughts, his emotions. The power coursing through his veins, tempting, taunting, breath-taking and deadly. Memories, fears...
The bike wreck, broken bones and ...
Chase had been talking about what he'd felt. But he'd thrown it towards Pogue, eyes ... something. As though it had been Pogue's fault. Or something like that. And Caleb had wanted to smash his face in, almost as bad as after he'd pulled that one on Ginny.
Idiot.
Yeah. He was.
He pulled into the driveway, into the garage. Went inside. His mother was reading; he neared her seat and kissed her cheek, a small smile returning at the absence of the once-too-familiar scent of alcohol. Some days, it was there again. More, it wasn't there. That was good.
Caleb wanted to hide, let himself really calm down. Figure it out, do research. Something.
Instead, he found himself asking his mother if she wanted to dine out. He had as good as promised Pogue he would make sure to eat, and closing up in his room ran the risk of skipping again; and it would, he knew, bring her joy. Make somebody gladder, with so very little effort, and no strings attached. He could do that, and the idea of something like that brought a bit of... soothing.
Evelyn smiled and agreed; Caleb smiled and said he'd be out on the grounds for a bit, until it was time for that. She said she'd be ready; he did go back outside for a walk.
He didn't wander for long. The sun's reflection from one of the upstairs windows caught his eye, and he only barely thought about it. Just enough to look around, out of habit. Then powered up, and leaped up on the rooftop. It wasn't anything that would register with the rest, too little and too short and too harmless for that. But he felt it.
By the time his feet thunked on the tiles, he was laughing. At himself, for consciously indulging, a bit. But mostly at the sheer joy of this.
Magic. It burned away the anger from his veins. He turned back to look upon the vista that opened up from this vantage point, breathing deep, even the scent different through the crackling of power.
Another breath, and he very, very deliberately focused and. let. go. Released the power completely.
It left him gasping and shivering in the wind, yearning to reach back for it, sink into it and stay there.
But he didn't.
He stood there until he'd caught his breath, until he'd caught back his control. Then walked around the roof, then sat, back against one of the chimneys, looking over the grounds.
Letting the silence, the peace seep into him.
Letting his mind drift. Away and around the issues and person who'd gotten him all worked up. Letting his eye drift, over the drying green of later summer; over the murky reflected sunlight from the lake.
Right here and now, he didn't have to try to be there for anybody, in any - straightforward or twisted - way. Right here and now, he wasn't weighing down on anybody, no matter how willing they were to take up that burden when he needed it.
It was an odd perspective, but in a good way.
He sat there, letting himself not think for a long time. Until the setting sun was bringing out the promise of coming fall in the maples. Until sitting in the shade, in the wind, got him to feel the boiling heat of earlier leave him to a cool calm, more than skin-deep.
When he stood, he stretched a bit. Then carefully made his way to the trapdoor down into the attic and let himself in, not even needing or reaching for a single trickle of magic. Came downstairs to his room; dialed Sarah's number and left a message so that she wouldn't worry, since she might worry, and he didn't want that. Took a shower and changed, then came downstairs.
His mother was ready.
He took her to her favorite restaurant. They both knew whom they would meet there; what topic would be discussed. What they would have - and he had to admit, it was nice; she always did have good taste.
Simple, effortless by now. One of his father's old associates reminded him he was coming of age in less than a month; Caleb and his mother looked at each other, and laughed a little, properly as surprised, not ridiculing the acquaintance, of course. When left to their own, they talked about that.
There didn't seem to be any spikes of magic use coming from anywhere around him. He was glad.
Tonight was simple. Maybe the problems weren't all solved, and it was likely to get even worse before it got any better?
But he could use the rest.
And it was also good, anyway.