(no subject)
The dark, raw and unprotected landscape, taut with a danger. The English countryside has no care for the sanity of its inhabitants.
I went back to Norfolk. A visit long overdue. Little has changed; and much has happened. This is the comfort of the place. It always has been. Confusion was the theme of the visit. A visit that was made in order to provoke answers created nothing but confusion. As frustrating as that sounds, I'd like to think that sometimes the sprouting of further questions are answers in themselves. A confirmation of life.
I recalled there this awful sense that my relationship with those people is indefinable. And I theorised that perhaps we have forever attempted to label our friendships with the nearest applicable roles, when really it has been nothing but destructive to do so. This was perhaps the closest to a conclusion that I came.
It was a long weekend with much thought and discussion and amusement and a great deal of worry, confusion and sadness. But as always, some of those moments I would gladly have been lost in forever.
Norfolk soothes everything that is happening elsewhere. It numbs Chris. It almost smirks at the Chris cloud. It is an older force, a more protective force. And as it turns out a more concrete one.
I perhaps needed a little more time to recover from that weekend. And yet maybe finding a new friend was exactly what I needed. I met up with him on Thursday. And it was good. A friend who is fun and confident while so apparently vulnerable and sentimental. And a friend who welcomes friendship. It can't be a bad thing.
So we went to Bath. We wandered and lurked and amused ourselves. A pasttime for which a city was designed. And we sat in The Porter, in that very familiar seat. Would it be patronising to say he is human? It was refreshing. A good person, though totally oblivious to the world of current affairs. Like I often say about Alex, it's personalities like that that should set the standard.
So he spent the weekend here. It was nice. God it feels so nice to talk and joke and giggle. A weekend that really made me regret that I am such an anti-social recluse. We drank red bull and watched Jonathan Creek. We ate candiefloss :D
I'm going to relax with some more JC now, and put the finishing touches to my college work. Because I want that out the way. In 24 hours I want to have tied up a number of loose ends. And make the others look tidy.
I went back to Norfolk. A visit long overdue. Little has changed; and much has happened. This is the comfort of the place. It always has been. Confusion was the theme of the visit. A visit that was made in order to provoke answers created nothing but confusion. As frustrating as that sounds, I'd like to think that sometimes the sprouting of further questions are answers in themselves. A confirmation of life.
I recalled there this awful sense that my relationship with those people is indefinable. And I theorised that perhaps we have forever attempted to label our friendships with the nearest applicable roles, when really it has been nothing but destructive to do so. This was perhaps the closest to a conclusion that I came.
It was a long weekend with much thought and discussion and amusement and a great deal of worry, confusion and sadness. But as always, some of those moments I would gladly have been lost in forever.
Norfolk soothes everything that is happening elsewhere. It numbs Chris. It almost smirks at the Chris cloud. It is an older force, a more protective force. And as it turns out a more concrete one.
I perhaps needed a little more time to recover from that weekend. And yet maybe finding a new friend was exactly what I needed. I met up with him on Thursday. And it was good. A friend who is fun and confident while so apparently vulnerable and sentimental. And a friend who welcomes friendship. It can't be a bad thing.
So we went to Bath. We wandered and lurked and amused ourselves. A pasttime for which a city was designed. And we sat in The Porter, in that very familiar seat. Would it be patronising to say he is human? It was refreshing. A good person, though totally oblivious to the world of current affairs. Like I often say about Alex, it's personalities like that that should set the standard.
So he spent the weekend here. It was nice. God it feels so nice to talk and joke and giggle. A weekend that really made me regret that I am such an anti-social recluse. We drank red bull and watched Jonathan Creek. We ate candiefloss :D
I'm going to relax with some more JC now, and put the finishing touches to my college work. Because I want that out the way. In 24 hours I want to have tied up a number of loose ends. And make the others look tidy.