Friendships
I cant really remember whom i befriended in early primary school? Personally, I dont keep in constant contact with my primary school mates except my bestfriend; Kelly Goh Min Pei (whom btw, is all the way in Perth) because i didnt like the social circle i was surrounded in + i dont think i was mature enough for long-lasting friendships. Remember there was a period of time where we would bring our personal journals/diaries & ask our friends to fill its pages with their personal biography? I know there was always a section where we would write "Bestfriends:", 'Friends" & even "Enemies".
These so-called "Bestfriends", how would one define them? I would roughly sum it up as someone who understands my character, knows most of my habits + personal daily woes / problems / joys / activities, etc. Someone I trust enough and of course, want to divulge such information to. Someone whom obviously knows me well enough, but before a person knows you to such an extent, you would first have to allow such an person to enter into your life. That usually determines what role the person plays in my life - Whether he/she is simply an awkward 'hi,bye' friend or one whom I make small talk with (but its usually very superficial & shallow) or one whom I share my thoughts with on a personal level.
How do i assess the person before i allow him/herself to enter into my life? I am quite particular about my friends. I don't open up much to strangers so i definitely wont call myself a 'people person'. Why? Shyness used to be an issue but as i grew older (& wiser haha) , i realised that behind this 'shy' facade is actually a resistance on my part. I'm not sure on how to explain this resistance but its partly due to my sceptical nature and my idea of 'having a few good friends would do'.
I dont yearn for many friends or popularity. Though I do admit that i do get swayed at times & get a bit jealous when I see how 'popular' certain people are. But at the end of the day, i still stay true to what i believe in. - 'having a few good friends would do' They are hard to come by. Its not easy to find someone you can 'click' or 'connect' with or someone whom you would accept as a friend or someone respectable enough (to yourself) to earn your trust & respect.
But that's not all, I also feel quite strongly that it requires A LOT of effort & time to maintain a sustainable healthy friendship. And it cant be one-sided. And frankly, I get tired sometimes. So those 2 reasons, are mainly why i dont have/want too many good friends.
But when you do find that someone, hold on to them, treasure the friendship & dont let it wither. I probably have let go a couple over my life span, some of which i regret but I really do appreciate those that I have right now. Thank you friends. =D
These so-called "Bestfriends", how would one define them? I would roughly sum it up as someone who understands my character, knows most of my habits + personal daily woes / problems / joys / activities, etc. Someone I trust enough and of course, want to divulge such information to. Someone whom obviously knows me well enough, but before a person knows you to such an extent, you would first have to allow such an person to enter into your life. That usually determines what role the person plays in my life - Whether he/she is simply an awkward 'hi,bye' friend or one whom I make small talk with (but its usually very superficial & shallow) or one whom I share my thoughts with on a personal level.
How do i assess the person before i allow him/herself to enter into my life? I am quite particular about my friends. I don't open up much to strangers so i definitely wont call myself a 'people person'. Why? Shyness used to be an issue but as i grew older (& wiser haha) , i realised that behind this 'shy' facade is actually a resistance on my part. I'm not sure on how to explain this resistance but its partly due to my sceptical nature and my idea of 'having a few good friends would do'.
I dont yearn for many friends or popularity. Though I do admit that i do get swayed at times & get a bit jealous when I see how 'popular' certain people are. But at the end of the day, i still stay true to what i believe in. - 'having a few good friends would do' They are hard to come by. Its not easy to find someone you can 'click' or 'connect' with or someone whom you would accept as a friend or someone respectable enough (to yourself) to earn your trust & respect.
But that's not all, I also feel quite strongly that it requires A LOT of effort & time to maintain a sustainable healthy friendship. And it cant be one-sided. And frankly, I get tired sometimes. So those 2 reasons, are mainly why i dont have/want too many good friends.
But when you do find that someone, hold on to them, treasure the friendship & dont let it wither. I probably have let go a couple over my life span, some of which i regret but I really do appreciate those that I have right now. Thank you friends. =D