backgammon anyone?
i love my boyfriend. He is the most amazing guy in the whole wide world....somehow that doesn't stop me from being a crazy flirt, eventally i migh learn but for now lets just enjoy the boy drama shall we?
currently there are 3 players all of differenting weights:
-Trouble is the most dangerous, and the least all at the same time. Most dangerous because i absolutely adore him. He has the potential to be one of my best friends, and he is the one that loosing him i have the most to loose. friendship first and foremost i can not afford to loose especially becaiuse i'm just getting that kind of trust, let alone the inner circle i really hope he will become (equally, not just him in mine who would want that?). He also has power over me, i gave it to him i know, but at this point i can't get it back...so fuck. least so because he has a girlfriend of more than a year (some long distance) that he adores, he's not looking for anything else, and he's really geniuinely a flirt as far as i can tell, this is all relatively without conswquence because neither of us would ever jepordize our current relationships.
-yates is less dangerous because i'm not unwillingly attracted to him the way i am w/ trouble. he's cute i won't deny, but i don't feel like i'm being pulled toward him against my will like i do w/ trouble. That means i'm more in controll of the situation which is awesome for me. but i'm concerned that he has the most potential for being hurt. He's seen me "in my game" and that apparently isn't a turn-off. Not only that but, i'm most unlike anyone he knows. i realize that the things i'm not....i'm not into fashion, i don't care what he looks like, or status, or whatever is probably very unlike most girls he's used to. I enjoy his company because i actually respect his ability in a kitchen, again which i dont think he gets a lot of, and i expect him to rise above his "status quo" and be the smarter, more productive member of school/society and i think that is different too....thats not good. All of it i would never change, but being "i've never met anyone like you" always seems to cause more touble.
-matt is just cute, innocent, and exactally like i was at his 18-19. i kinda want to be his mentor, but its always nice to be appreciaited for being a girl too. pretty low threat, the x-taking, trance youngins aren't really my style anymore. if he was 4-6 years older we'd have a problem, thank god he's not cute enough for real trouble.
despite everything, i still want reeeeeeeeeeeeally bad to make out w/ a girl in front of any or all 3 of the boys. i think it would be amazing. really, blow their minds and set in stone just an image ya know? its too bad that so many girls in the south/my circle seem so...well set in stone about that. even the lesbo wouldn't be into just making out, especially for the reaction of straight boys......alas
currently there are 3 players all of differenting weights:
-Trouble is the most dangerous, and the least all at the same time. Most dangerous because i absolutely adore him. He has the potential to be one of my best friends, and he is the one that loosing him i have the most to loose. friendship first and foremost i can not afford to loose especially becaiuse i'm just getting that kind of trust, let alone the inner circle i really hope he will become (equally, not just him in mine who would want that?). He also has power over me, i gave it to him i know, but at this point i can't get it back...so fuck. least so because he has a girlfriend of more than a year (some long distance) that he adores, he's not looking for anything else, and he's really geniuinely a flirt as far as i can tell, this is all relatively without conswquence because neither of us would ever jepordize our current relationships.
-yates is less dangerous because i'm not unwillingly attracted to him the way i am w/ trouble. he's cute i won't deny, but i don't feel like i'm being pulled toward him against my will like i do w/ trouble. That means i'm more in controll of the situation which is awesome for me. but i'm concerned that he has the most potential for being hurt. He's seen me "in my game" and that apparently isn't a turn-off. Not only that but, i'm most unlike anyone he knows. i realize that the things i'm not....i'm not into fashion, i don't care what he looks like, or status, or whatever is probably very unlike most girls he's used to. I enjoy his company because i actually respect his ability in a kitchen, again which i dont think he gets a lot of, and i expect him to rise above his "status quo" and be the smarter, more productive member of school/society and i think that is different too....thats not good. All of it i would never change, but being "i've never met anyone like you" always seems to cause more touble.
-matt is just cute, innocent, and exactally like i was at his 18-19. i kinda want to be his mentor, but its always nice to be appreciaited for being a girl too. pretty low threat, the x-taking, trance youngins aren't really my style anymore. if he was 4-6 years older we'd have a problem, thank god he's not cute enough for real trouble.
despite everything, i still want reeeeeeeeeeeeally bad to make out w/ a girl in front of any or all 3 of the boys. i think it would be amazing. really, blow their minds and set in stone just an image ya know? its too bad that so many girls in the south/my circle seem so...well set in stone about that. even the lesbo wouldn't be into just making out, especially for the reaction of straight boys......alas