The rest...
Title: Depth Perception
Fandom: SGA
Pairing: John/Rodney
Rating: NC-17
Summary: John and Rodney are stranded on a planet together, and Rodney finds out John isn't exactly the guy he thought he was.
Notes: Your basic, straight-up romance. Smut-filled comfort fic, for me, at least, because writing it made me happy. Much thanks to mmmchelle for the beta and to her and wickdzoot both for the support and cheerleading and general sweetness and fun.
ETA: Contains minor spoilers for "Siege III".
Depth Perception Part II
***
Day 12.
Rodney stepped out of the jumper late in the afternoon and stretched. It had been a long day of hiking yesterday, plus other assorted activities, of the naked kind, and his body was tired and stiff. It had been a bit of a relief to sit and finish his subroutines.
He found John out on the beach, barefoot, his pants rolled up. Water rushed up, foaming around his feet, and it must have been cold, but John didn't seem to notice. Instead he stared out to sea, a steady wind rippling his shirt. Rodney admired the sight before realizing he didn't have to admire from a distance, he could get right up close to admire if he wanted to. He could even touch.
He could also wait until John finished looking at whatever it was he was studying out there, and then admire him inside the warm, dry jumper. He kept on thinking that as he unlaced his boots, pulled off his socks and rolled up his pants.
The water was indeed icy cold and Rodney's feet sank into the wet sand. But when John smiled over his shoulder, Rodney no longer noticed or cared. He reached John and asked, "What are you doing out here? Keeping an eye out for those elusive fish?"
"I'm done fishing for the day. Now I'm just watching the water."
"Not to mention getting wet," Rodney said, as water splashed up over their feet, "and cold."
John leaned back against Rodney's chest and guided Rodney's hand under his shirt and onto his stomach. "You're nice and warm."
"I'm a warm kind of guy." Rodney kissed the back of his neck, then licked the skin directly below his hairline. Water swirled around his ankles, making him sink deeper into the sand. "Ask anyone."
John snorted.
"What, is that funny?" Rodney nipped at his neck.
"Very." John pushed his ass against Rodney's groin. "I like funny."
"Should I be flattered?"
"Absolutely."
Truth was, Rodney was enormously flattered. John seemed to inexplicably like everything about him. He mouthed the side of John's neck. John's skin was cold and he tasted of the sea.
"I think there's a storm coming in. Surf's rough. Do those look like rain clouds to you?" John pointed out to the horizon.
Rodney peered over John's shoulder. All he saw was a dark shadow. "What am I, a weatherman now?"
John shrugged. "Just wondering. I'm not so fond of storms anymore."
His voice was quiet and Rodney barely heard him over the wind, but he understood. The thought of it brought a flood of memories, none of them pleasant. "We'll be fine in the jumper," he said, which was a pretty pointless thing to say, because John already knew that.
John lifted Rodney's left arm, tracing a finger along the pale, twisted scar remaining on his wrist. It used to bother Rodney how quickly he had broken, that it was a sign of weakness. But not anymore. Once the Wraith ships started coming, things like that didn't matter. He took John's hand in his, turning John around to face him. "It's faded," he said. "See? Can barely make it out anymore."
John's face was still troubled, much to Rodney's consternation. So Rodney kissed him, soft, gentle kisses, one hand cupping the side of his face. When John sighed and leaned into his touch, Rodney felt gratified. And when John kissed him harder, hugging him close and pressing his growing erection against Rodney's hip, Rodney was surprised and touched by John's response. He wouldn't have predicted that he could affect John this way, get him aroused and excited and make him stop thinking about what might have been.
Comfort had never exactly been Rodney's forte.
Rodney slid his hands down over John's ass, squeezing, and John moaned, clutching at Rodney's shoulders. Rodney dove in and kissed his neck, reaching down to stroke John's thickening cock.
"Rodney, please," John sighed. He pushed forward, into Rodney's hand.
Next thing Rodney knew he was down on his knees, in the icy surf, unzipping John's pants. He could hear John's laughing protestations, but John wasn't making any move to stop him. He freed John's erect cock from his boxers. It was all warmth and smooth skin in his hand, and he could feel John tremble as he took it into his mouth. He sucked down the length of the shaft and back up again, with slow, firm strokes of his tongue, over and over again, as John cupped his head with gentle hands. Rodney thought he heard John say something, but his voice was unintelligible over the wind. Rodney sucked harder, until John's hips jerked and his cock swelled in Rodney's mouth. A little more sucking and John quivered and flooded Rodney's mouth with warm come. Rodney swallowed him down eagerly and without hesitation.
When he finished, he rose to his feet, cold and numb from his knees on down. John chuckled, leaning on him. "I can't believe you did that after complaining about the cold." John hugged him and leaned against Rodney's chest, further unsteadying him.
"I can't believe it, either," Rodney said. "Because I think my feet are frozen into ice cubes. Can we go in now?"
"You mean you want your blowjob inside a nice, warm jumper?"
Rodney nodded. "That's exactly what I mean."
"I thought you were made of sterner stuff, Rodney."
"You do know this is me you're talking about?" Rodney pointed out, to John's laughter.
They didn't bother with their socks, just shoved their feet directly into their boots and slowly made their way back up to the jumper. Rodney's feet began to ache as the feeling in them returned, but before he could complain John had stripped him of his clothes and laid him down on the sleeping bags. His warm, wet mouth started at Rodney's feet, warming them, then worked his way up Rodney's legs. By the time it descended on his cock Rodney was no longer cold. And all he could think was that John was getting really, really good at blowing him. Astoundingly good.
Day 13.
The rain thrummed steadily on the roof, and a gust of wind rocked the craft. Nonetheless the only thing Rodney was aware of was John. John straddling his lap, John's hands stroking his cock. John's warm, sweaty body encompassing him. "Oh, god, you're wonderful," Rodney moaned. "Just what you're doing, it's good, good, good."
"Damn right I'm wonderful." John squeezed harder, rubbing his sunscreen-slicked thumb over the tip of Rodney's cock.
"Oh, jeeze--" Rodney tightened his hold around John's waist, pulling him closer, until he could feel the knuckles of John's hand rubbing against his stomach. "More. Do it faster." He raised his head and received a rough kiss, the force of it pushing him back against the bench. He tried to shove his hips up, wanting to thrust into John's fist but John's weight held him down. It was strangely exhilarating, trapped in the bench seat of the jumper by John. John could hold him and keep him there forever, as long as his clever hands kept moving, pulling up pleasure from deep inside his body.
"Like this?" John asked, picking up the pace with a twist of his wrist that left Rodney gasping.
"Oh, oh, yes, like that, like that."
"Or like this?" John slowed his movements, and leaning back to reach a second hand down to tug gently at Rodney's balls.
"That's--that's good, too." Rodney managed. "Oh god, do anything you want to me." Rodney truly meant it, and that was a little frightening. Then the thought was gone, because John was stroking both his balls and his cock and it all went spiraling out of control. He came with a loud moan, fingers scrambling at John's back.
Breathless and shaken, Rodney leaned his head back as the last waves of pleasure faded. He opened his eyes to see John watching him with a delighted grin. "Have I mentioned how much I like making you come?"
Rodney licked his lips, not sure if he could make his mouth work again. "Um", he said intelligently. He liked it too. He liked it a lot.
"It's fun. And satisfying." John furrowed his brow. "And it's much easier with guys. But mostly because it's you," he finished earnestly.
A small laugh bubbled up inside of Rodney. He was happy, because John liked having sex with him, because John was naked in his lap, because he was stuck in a jumper in the rain with a naked John who liked having sex with him. He pulled John's head down to his and kissed him.
"Does that mean you like it, too?" John asked when Rodney released him.
Rodney smiled. "It's like finding out wormhole travel exists all over again, that's how amazing it is."
John made a face. "Oookay," he said.
"Oh come on, didn't you get all excited when we first told you about it?" Rodney poked John's shoulder with a finger.
"No, I was overwhelmed and confused," John said. "Suddenly everyone was all excited and making a fuss over me, and I wasn't really sure why, except that this weird equipment kept responding to me, weird *alien* equipment that I could work with my mind, and *that* was pretty damn freaky."
"Please, don't remind me, I was incredibly jealous of you."
"Really? Of me?"
"Yes, of you, with your 'I'm so cool' hair and sexy slouch and hyperactive ancient gene." Rodney sighed. "I didn't know if I wanted to slap you or sleep with you."
John's smile bordered on smirk. "I was pretty sure you were an arrogant ass, but one who became oddly cute when excited. All I could think was thank god I gave up doing guys, because no way was I going to get a big dumb crush on you."
"Oh. Smart thinking." Rodney touched John's lips with a finger, then leaned in and kissed him.
"Not successful, by the way."
"Thank god."
"Not that this is a crush," John said quickly. "It might have started like that, because even though you were obnoxious you were smart and cute and would kind of bounce when you got excited, but then you know, it's like--not only that, okay?"
Rodney nodded. "Okay. Because--yeah, not only that." God, it was more than that, if John knew how much more he might panic, and that wouldn't be good, not when they were trapped in a small jumper together. "I'm just glad that you ended up there, touching equipment that you weren't supposed to. Serendipity. Not that I believe in such things."
"No, of course not."
"How did you end up at stationed at McMurdo anyway?" Rodney asked.
John stiffened in his arms. "I managed to piss off a few people," John said, his cool tone matching his body language.
"No kidding. You?"
"Shocking, isn't it?" John climbed off his lap, abruptly.
"All right, clearly, a bad subject," Rodney said, holding up his hand. He already missed the warmth of John's body. "Forget I asked." He watched as John turned away, wiping his hands on a towel. "So, looks like rain, huh?"
"Rodney," John started, and Rodney was startled by the sadness in his voice. But before John's could continue, the jumper's warning system beeped. "Huh. That's can't be good."
Rodney scrambled off the bench as John slid into the pilot's seat. Rodney took the one beside him. "Energy burst detected, source right below the horizon," Rodney said, calling up the readouts. He looked at John. "The gate was just activated."
John's face showed his dismay. "I'm thinking this isn't going to be a good thing."
Rodney nodded. "I'm glad we decided to stay cloaked." He watched as a blip appeared on the screen. "Crap. It's wraith. A wraith dart."
"I'm only seeing one so far."
They watched in silence, the red dot moving slowly across the schematic of the sky. Rodney became very aware of his naked ass on the seat, and that the seats weren't intended to be sat in naked. The fabric was rough and uncomfortable. He stole a glance at John, taking in the incongruity of his nakedness as he fiddled with the controls, expression grim. Somehow, he managed to look less naked than Rodney felt.
"Gate just deactivated," John informed him. "Still detecting only one dart."
"Right. Reconnaissance, you think? He's keeping a pretty high orbit." Rodney drummed his fingers on the console.
"Must be."
"If he doesn't leave, you know, if he stays on the planet for another 7 days, and it comes time to activate the gate--"
"I know, Rodney. We'll be detected," John said. "How is the weapons system looking?"
"If I have to power the weapons, it's possible the replacement conduit will blow, and we won't be able to power up the transmitter. Or maybe we can. I can't predict what's going to happen, not completely," Rodney finished, frustrated. Even though cloaked, he felt exposed as he watched the dart maintain orbit. He looked up through the windshield at the clouds and rain, as if expecting to see it appear in front of them.
"Well, let's hope that once he figures out no one is here, he'll leave." John turned to face Rodney, looking him up and down. "In the meanwhile, I think I'd feel more comfortable if we were dressed."
"Of course--uh--" Rodney almost addressed him as "Colonel" again, because the situation called for it, or at least he thought so until John surprised him by leaning over and pressing a hard, swift kiss on his lips. "John," he said. "Clothes. Good idea."
He did feel better once he was dressed, lacing up his boots, and, following John's lead, latching up his vest. "Colonel", he said, as they returned to their seats.
John shot him an odd look.
"Right," Rodney said under his breath.
They sat quietly, the sound of the rain filling the room. Then, staring at the screen, John spoke. "I disobeyed direct orders."
It took Rodney a moment to understand what John was referring to. "I'm sure you had good reason to," he finally said.
In an even, quiet voice, John told him everything, how he disobeyed orders because he had to rescue his people, but it all went wrong, and he ended up rescuing no one. His buddies were dead, and he found himself demoted, in deep trouble, with only a sympathetic commanding officer keeping him from being booted out completely.
He told Rodney how he liked being at McMurdo, because no one bothered him, and he wasn't responsible for anyone, how he wasn't expected to save them. Then he had been tapped to transport one General O'Neill to a research station, and everything had changed. Next thing he knew he was in Atlantis, shooting his own commanding officer.
Rodney's heart felt tight. "John, you had to--"
"I know, I know," John snapped. "But that doesn't make it any better, okay?"
"I'm sorry," Rodney said.
John fell silent.
"You kept us all alive," Rodney said at last. "Maybe you didn't want to be the hero, but you were, and you were damn good at it. Aside from that whole suicide run thing. Don't ever do that again, okay?"
"Rodney, I can't ever promise that." John didn't sound angry anymore.
"You could at least pretend to."
"Would it make you feel better?"
Rodney nodded. "Yes, it would."
John shook his head and his smile was sad. "Doesn't matter what I say. I can't save everyone. Hell, I couldn't save Ford. What if it's you next time?"
"If you can't save someone? Then they are unsavable."
John shook his head. "I can't believe that."
"You know what? You have a team. There are four of us--"
"And I’m sleeping with one of them."
"Yes, yes, the wisdom of which can be debated, but what I'm saying is, you can't go running off by yourself because you have to work with your team, because that's what being part of a team is all about." Rodney was sure that he was babbling now, and not making any sense at all, but he was also sure that Teyla and hell, even Ronon would say the exact same thing. "Think about it. Don't make us have to save you from yourself."
John leaned back in his chair. "And when did you become so soldierly?"
"Me?" Rodney asked, startled. "I'm no soldier. You know that."
But John kept looking at him, face speculative.
Day 15.
The dart remained in orbit for ten hours before leaving.
"Thank god," Rodney sighed, as the gate deactivated. "What the hell was he looking at? How long does it take to scan a planet? One that you already culled?"
"It makes you wonder. I don't think they're all of a kind, you know? Maybe one community had culled, and this guy didn't know it yet." John stood and stretched.
It looked like a good idea. Rodney stood and did the same, listening as his spine popped and joints crackled. They had remained at their stations the entire time, watching and waiting, listening to the rain, and now Rodney was restless and exhausted all at the same time.
"I don't know about you," John said, "but I need to get out of here for a while. The walls are closing in on me."
Rodney looked out the windshield at the steady rain. "You mean, like outside 'out of here'?" He thought John didn't like storms.
"That's exactly what I mean." John opened a locker and retrieved two rain ponchos. "Come on Rodney, a little water never hurt anyone." He tossed one to Rodney.
"Why do I always wind up getting wet with you?" Rodney griped, shaking out the poncho. He looked up to see John grinning slyly. "Oh, what are you, twelve?" Still, he smiled too. It was nice to have John being John again. He pulled the poncho over his head. "Shall we?"
Once they got out into the wind, Rodney had to hold the wildly flapping poncho close. The hood bothered him, restricting his vision, but when he pulled it down, the wind blew rainwater directly into his ear. "Great," Rodney muttered, pulling the hood back up.
They squelched through the grass, marching over the dunes. John walked fast, seemingly unfazed by the hood or the rain and the wind. Rodney had to hurry to keep up. It felt strangely exhilarating, to be out in the wind and the weather, the sound of the waves crashing on one side, the whistle of wind through grass and scrub on the other. The tide was high, the surf surging up to touch the base of the dunes, and water encompassed the entire beach area.
John stopped short. "Oh, damn it, the berries. I'll bet they got blown away."
"Don't tell me you were really going to eat those?"
"Yes, I was. Or, at least, taste them." John turned and headed for the path leading into the forested area.
As they traveled inland, the wind eased. They reached the area just past the stream, where they had previously found a low cluster of berry bushes and John shook his head, water dripping off his nose. They had been stripped clean of ripe berries, a few remaining green ones lingering on the lower branches "Aw, they're all gone," he cried out in dismay.
"That's all right. They were probably poisonous," Rodney told him.
"What is with you and the poison thing? You know, Rodney, not everything is out to get you."
"But it could be, hmmm? Better safe than sorry."
"Oh really? What about me, then? I'm definitely out to get you." John poked a finger into Rodney's chest.
"But that's completely different definition of 'get'." Rodney backed away as John advanced on him, because John was dripping wet, and he looked like trouble. "One that I actually like very much, even though it doesn't seem to be very safe."
"You're not sorry though, are you?" John smiled, blinking water out of his eyes.
"What do you think?"
John drew closer, still smiling.
"Oh, no, I'm going to end up soaking wet, aren't I?" Rodney came up short as his back touched against a tree.
John didn't stop until he was leaning right up against Rodney, pushing him against the tree. He pressed in to lick Rodney's cheek. "Maybe." He kissed Rodney's mouth delicately. "Probably."
John tasted like the rain, and Rodney clung to his poncho, moving into the kiss. John caressed his head, pushing Rodney's hood back. Cold water trickled down Rodney neck. "Oh, damn it--" Rodney yanked the hood back up.
"Sorry, that was an accident, I swear," John said, backing away with his hands up.
"Right." Rodney glared at him, but John's expression remained perfectly innocent.
"All right. No berries, no getting wet," John paused to sigh dramatically, "how about we head back?"
Rodney nodded, still wary. "Yes, thank you."
The trek back was into the wind, and Rodney had to narrow his eyes against the onslaught of the rain. His legs were wet from the knees down, his feet were soaked, and all he could think of was the nice dry jumper, with the warm, soft sleeping bags. And John, naked. Despite all the sex they'd had in the past five days, the idea of being naked with John still thrilled him. He didn't think the novelty of it would ever wear off. He didn't know if the same were true for John, if John would eventually lose interest. Although for some reason John seemed to like him a great deal, certainly more than any of his other lovers ever did. None of his other relationships were ever long-term, especially with the men--those relationships were basically only for the sex, and this was not like that at all. He was different, too, doing things he never thought he could, like stepping through a Stargate with a P90 in his hand. Therefore it was entirely possible, albeit improbable, that a genuine relationship might actually be occurring, and that was really cool.
He was brought out of his thoughts when he realized they had reached the dunes, and that he had unthinkingly followed John to the edge, overlooking the sea. The ocean was frothing below, waves splashing up directly below them.
"Wow," John shouted over the noise. "Pretty wild, huh?"
Rodney put a hand on John's shoulder. "We'd better be careful--it's possible the wave action has eroded the base of the dunes."
"What?"
"I said," Rodney shouted, struggling to be heard over the wind and crashing surf. "I think the--"
And then the ground beneath his feet gave way. Rodney flailed wildly, cursing as he slid down the crumbling slope onto his ass. Icy cold water rushed up to greet him, flowing up under his poncho, churning up the sand.
John had splashed down next to him. "Whoa," He righted himself with a great deal of splashing, then grabbed Rodney's arm. "Are you alright?" he shouted as the water receded.
Rodney glared as his initial panic faded and irritation set in. "Oh, just fine, I'm fine really, this is just *fine*." He climbed to his feet, tried to right his poncho, then finally pulled it off over his head in disgust. "Cold! This is cold, absolutely, no doubt about it, cold."
Another wave came up, almost knocking Rodney off his feet. It didn't help that John grabbed his arm again, tugging hard, throwing him off-balance. "Rodney, over here," John yelled. "We can climb this way."
It was rough going, the sand crumbling away beneath their feet. By the time they made it back to the top, Rodney's heart was pounding. His hands and knees were covered with sand, and he was soaked to the skin. "I knew I'd get wet out there," he yelled to John. "I could have stayed in the nice warm jumper, hiking has never been my thing. I don't know why I thought it would be."
John was ahead of him, patting his pockets with a look of consternation.
"What?" Rodney asked.
"You wouldn't have the remote opener for the jumper, would you?"
Rodney's heart dropped. "You're kidding me." Alarmed, he gazed in the direction of the cloaked, and very securely locked down jumper, then back down the dune at the water. "You've got to be kidding. No, I don't have it, you had it, and we cannot get into the jumper without it. I'm wet and miserable and cold and if you think I'm going down there to look for it you are absolutely insane--"
He turned back around and John, device in hand, was lowering the ramp of the decloaked jumper. "Just kidding," John said, with a bright grin.
Speechless, Rodney stared at John.
John's grin grew broader. "But you totally fell for it, didn't you?"
Rodney found his voice as he marched up the ramp. "I don't believe you," he burst out. "Of all the childish, ridiculous--I'm cold and wet and I have sand in my underwear, I'm *chafing* right now, damn it, and you--you--you're so--" Safely inside, he spun around and glared at John, who looked remarkably unrepentant, not to mention exceedingly proud of himself. "You know, you may be brave, you may insanely self-sacrificing and courageous but I'm coming to the conclusion you're also the biggest damn goof I've ever met." When John opened his mouth to speak, Rodney cut him short with a raised finger. "Ah--and don't deny the brave part, because you're sleeping with me, and if that doesn't say brave, I don't know what does."
John nodded, still grinning as he pulled off his poncho, his jacket, and then his shirt.
"Don't try and change the subject." Rodney's eyes dropped to John's bare chest. "Did I mention childish? And ridiculous?" he asked with a huff.
"I think you did." John unlaced his shoes and kicked them off.
"How about unrepentant? I'm definitely detecting a lack of repentance."
"I'm afraid you're right," John said. He unfastened his pants and then dropped first his pants and then his underwear down to his ankles.
"And that you've totally destroyed the mythical, heroic impression I had previously held of you?"
John peeled off his wet socks. "Good." He padded toward Rodney, starkly naked, sand smeared across one thigh, wet hair plastered against his head. "I'm me, Rodney," he said, arms spread. "Just--me."
"For which I'm profoundly thankful," Rodney said, and pulled him into a kiss, heedless of his own cold, wet clothes.
Day 17.
"Do it," John said, spreading his legs.
"If it feels uncomfortable, we can go back to what we were doing."
"Rodney, I said I wanted to try it, didn't I?"
"Yes, you did." Rodney slid his fingers behind John's balls, then, reaching further back, circled John's opening with a slick finger. When John sighed and lifted his hips, Rodney eased his fingertip inside. Muscles contracted, fighting the intrusion for a brief moment, then relaxed, allowing Rodney's finger to slide all the way in.
"Oh," John said. "Weird."
"It gets better, I promise." Rodney captured John's cock again with his mouth, sweeping his tongue along the underside while stroking John on the inside with his finger. John felt warm and smooth like silk, Rodney's finger moving easily as he pulled out and pushed back in.
"Mmm. I'm getting the 'better' part now." John pulled his knees up and spread his legs, lifting his hips further. "Wow. That's really...can you push harder?"
Pleased, Rodney reached in deep, his finger sliding over a slight bump, and John let out a strangled cry. "Ah, there it is. You know, I've never been quite sure before if I've actually located the prostate." Rodney ran his finger over it again, and looked up. "That was good, right?"
John stared down at him, panting. "Yes. Good."
"Hmmm. I thought so." Rodney moved his finger around some more, while cradling John's cock in his other hand and sucking down the side. Soon John began to squirm, shoving his ass down onto Rodney's hand, so Rodney decided it was time to work in a second finger, squeezing it in past his index finger. John grunted, digging his feet in and shoving his hips forward.
Rodney didn't bother to ask if that one was okay, too.
Instead he kept his mouth busy on John's balls, sucking lightly, first one, then the other, to John's moaned encouragement. Muscles trembled, then clenched and released around Rodney's fingers, and every time Rodney reached deep inside John let out a delighted gasp.
It was fun.
Rodney couldn't remember ever being this relaxed and comfortable with someone, taking the time to explore, to find out exactly what his partner liked. He actually couldn't remember being all that concerned over what he partner liked, being too busy with the "oh my god, I'm actually having sex" kind of thoughts to even consider it.
With John, things were different. He was finding it pretty damn cool that he could cause John to make all sorts of crazy noises, that he could suck on John's cock and shove with his fingers and John would squirm frantically beneath him.
As John's moans became shorter and more intense, Rodney backed off. He let John's cock slip from his mouth, and moved to lick and nip at John's thigh.
John grabbed his shoulder. "Rodney, oh god, please--don't stop," he pleaded, voice ragged.
"Stopping? Who said anything about stopping?" Rodney squeezed John's cock, then pulled it back to lick from John's balls all the way up to the head with one long swipe of the tongue. "I'm just taking my time, enjoying myself."
With a pained noise, John rocked down onto Rodney's hand. Rodney held his hand steady, letting John fuck himself, ass slamming against Rodney's hand. "Oh, god. Can you come like this?" Rodney asked.
"No," John whimpered. "I--I have to--" He grabbed his cock.
"Wait, wait--." But before Rodney could stop him, John brought himself off with three quick, hard strokes, his entire body stiffening, the muscles in his neck cording. Rodney felt an odd lurch in his stomach because it was an astonishing thing to see, John totally open and exposed, skin sheened with sweat, face twisted in a grimace of pleasure, hand wrapped around his cock and come oozing out between his fingers.
When John's body went limp, Rodney slid his fingers free, making John shake again. "Ooh, sorry," Rodney murmured, bending to kiss John's stomach.
John opened his eyes and gave a weak laugh. "S'okay. Especially after that."
Rodney ran his hand down John's thigh. "So, the finger-fucking goes on the list?"
John nodded. "I think it goes straight to the top of the list."
"This is going to be a long list." Rodney grabbed the nearby towel, wiped his hands, then handed it to John, who scrubbed lazily at his belly.
"Wow, totally wiped out." John stretched his arms out over his head, looking up at the ceiling. "Have you ever had this much sex before?"
Rodney snorted. "Not even close. Maybe if you added up all the sex I've ever had, it would equal this week."
"You said you thought I looked like I got a lot of sex." John poked Rodney with a toe. "Why is that?"
Rodney sighed. "Must you have such a good memory? Because you are good-looking, not to mention charming. And cocky. You have that whole cocky thing going on."
John grinned.
"Yeah, like that."
"Of course I'm cocky. I have a really cute boyfriend, and he's good in bed, too." He squeezed Rodney with his legs, knees bumping Rodney's arms.
"You're kind of nuts," Rodney said, flustered. "But I like it." He climbed over John's legs, and leaned down to kiss his mouth, which took a great deal of time to do properly. When he was done John simply smiled up at him, dopey and content. Rodney shook his head, not wanting to admit how much that look got under his skin. "I have to wash up, okay?"
He returned to find John under the blankets, eyes closed, chest exposed. Rodney crawled and laid down next him, sliding under the blankets and pressing himself against John's warm skin. John stirred, then rolled over, his ass tucked into Rodney's lap. Rodney put his arm around John's waist and rested his hand on John's chest.
"John," he whispered into the thick black hair tickling his nose. Then, "Colonel", even more quietly, just for the hell of it, just because it was almost funny to think how little he had actually seen of John before all this.
Day 20.
"Nervous?" John asked.
Rodney rubbed his hands together, leaning forward in his seat. "No." He took a breath. "Yes. Maybe."
"Me, too. But this is going to work."
Rodney watched the red blip move across the screen, edging slowly toward the vector indicating the range of the transmitter. "And how do you know that?"
"Because you'll make it work."
"No pressure, huh?"
"You're tough," John said with a wave of his hand. He was leaning back in his chair, the very picture of nonchalance. "You can handle it."
"I'm not tough. I'm soft and kind of squishy." Rodney wiped his palms on his thighs. "Okay, it's in range."
"Then let's do it."
Rodney dialed the sequence for home. "Dialing," he said, needlessly. He felt as though all the air had gone from the jumper.
"Try to do it right this time," John teased.
Rodney pressed the last symbol, and waited, watching the readouts. Then relief flooded his body. "It worked--the gate just activated. It worked," he said excitedly. He grinned at John. "We're going home."
John's head bobbed as he nodded rapidly. "We are. We really are. Nice job Rodney." He grinned back.
Rodney pointed to the mike. "Maybe we should say something?"
John's brows rose and his mouth made a little round "o" as he sat forward. Activating the mike, he announced, "Hello, Atlantis? This is Colonel Sheppard. Anybody home?"
Silence first, then Elizabeth's voice came though, her disbelief evident. "John? Oh my god, John is that you?"
"Yes, it is," John said smoothly. "And I've got McKay right here next to me. We seem to be in need of a lift home."
Rodney added, "Elizabeth, I'm transmitting the coordinates right now."
"Rodney? You're both all right. Wait--we're receiving the coordinates right now. Colonel, we didn't know what happened to you, how--?" Her voice rose in pitch then broke off.
Rodney could picture her face as she struggled for composure. His own throat got tight, and he felt a little guilty for having enjoyed himself so much while she had to cope with their disappearance.
"We're safe, and we've been safe, just stuck. The jumper is out of commission. And I'm sorry but we weren't able to make contact sooner," John told her.
"Sit tight," she said. "I have a team on the way."
They spoke a little further, then signed off. Rodney shut down the gate, falling back into his chair with a sigh of relief. His hands felt shaky as he rubbed his forehead, watching the screen until the gate activated again. "It's one of ours," Rodney informed John. "We're finally going home."
As they headed out the jumper, John took one last look around the tidied up interior. "We got rid of all the incriminating evidence, right?"
"Incriminating," Rodney said quietly. He knew that was what their relationship would become on Atlantis. It was going to be different between them from now on. It had to be.
Home
Rodney figured people would be happy to see them, but he wasn't prepared for level of enthusiasm that engulfed them the moment they stepped into the city. Elizabeth hugged them both, blinking rapidly, then hugged Rodney again. Teyla bumped her forehead against his and held him there, her delicate hands digging into his shoulders. Rodney saw Ronon grab John's shoulder and shake him like a puppy with a toy, grinning wildly. Rodney tried to dodge him, but Ronon was quick, and promptly did the same to him. Before Rodney could recover his balance Radek grabbed his hand and shook it, almost as roughly.
Everyone was talking at once, asking questions, demanding to know what happened to them, how they survived on the planet, and Rodney was pretty certain he caught something about "managing to survive without strangling each other". John smiled at everyone surrounding him, at ease with the all attention. The returning hero, enjoying himself.
Next thing Rodney knew Carson was hustling them into the infirmary for a checkup, despite Rodney's protestations that they were fine. "I'll be the judge of that," Carson told him sternly. "Now both of you, sit."
The curtain closed around him, and the usual exam took place--cold stethoscope, sharp needles, a bright light shining in his eyes. He was declared healthy, and his head, hard as a rock, with no ill effects from the blow.
Rodney could have told him that.
Just as Carson finished, Elizabeth returned, insisting they all go to the commissary for a bite to eat. Rodney was astonished to find they had pulled together an impromptu party, complete with a freshly baked cake. As he listened to Radek describe a new technology they had found in the city, a device they couldn't decipher, Rodney caught sight of John, draped over a chair across the room, laughing and talking with his compatriots.
Rodney couldn't shake off the odd feeling that the past three weeks were a dream. That they had never been naked together, that it was crazy to even think Lieutenant Colonel John Sheppard's mouth had been on his cock.
As soon as he could, Rodney begged off from the party, claiming exhaustion, that he only wanted a hot shower and to sleep in his own bed, which was the truth, at least partially. He was surprised to find himself escorted back to his room by a happy crowd, and when someone shoved a big plateful of cake into his hands as he said goodnight, he was touched and more than a little overwhelmed.
Finally, he was alone in his room, with his pictures of himself and his cat, clothes tossed about messily. "Home at last," he murmured. Back to normal. He had meetings the next day, he had reports to read, devices to figure out, missions in his future--nothing had changed.
He lingered under the shower for a half hour or more, the hot water relaxing his tense muscles, even though he would have preferred to be sitting in a cold stream on another planet. When he finished, he padded out into his room, barefoot, towel--a *clean* towel wrapped around his waist. "Oh," he said, as he caught sight of his visitor.
John stood in the middle of his room, freshly showered himself, in a clean tee-shirt and light-colored pants. "I let myself in," he said, only it was more of a question.
"I noticed. You being here, and all." Rodney's heart began to beat faster.
"It's nice to be home, isn't it?"
"Yes, it is."
John leaned one hip up against Rodney's desk. "Listen, I know we've been living in each other's back pockets, so you probably want to get some space to yourself." He idly traced a finger through the frosting on the slice of cake. "Not to mention I'm sure you have a ton of Rodney-type things to do, but I just wanted to stop in, and say 'goodnight' before I went to bed."
Rodney eyed the slouch, the studied coolness, the casual shrug, and tried not to smile. He might have been fooled by it at one time, but now he knew better. He marched up, slid one arm around John's waist, wrapped the other around his shoulders, and kissed him, hard, leaning into it and dipping John back. John hung onto him fiercely, his grip bruisingly tight.
"Space? Highly overrated," Rodney said, with a grin he suspected was pretty cocky. "How about I sweep you off your feet and into my bed, instead?"
John nodded rapidly. "That would be cool, too." He reached down to Rodney's waist. "Hey, look, your towel fell off. How'd that happen?"
"Oh, that was smooth," Rodney told him.
They stumbled toward the bed, hands getting entangled as they both tried to open John's pants.
Fandom: SGA
Pairing: John/Rodney
Rating: NC-17
Summary: John and Rodney are stranded on a planet together, and Rodney finds out John isn't exactly the guy he thought he was.
Notes: Your basic, straight-up romance. Smut-filled comfort fic, for me, at least, because writing it made me happy. Much thanks to mmmchelle for the beta and to her and wickdzoot both for the support and cheerleading and general sweetness and fun.
ETA: Contains minor spoilers for "Siege III".
Depth Perception Part II
***
Day 12.
Rodney stepped out of the jumper late in the afternoon and stretched. It had been a long day of hiking yesterday, plus other assorted activities, of the naked kind, and his body was tired and stiff. It had been a bit of a relief to sit and finish his subroutines.
He found John out on the beach, barefoot, his pants rolled up. Water rushed up, foaming around his feet, and it must have been cold, but John didn't seem to notice. Instead he stared out to sea, a steady wind rippling his shirt. Rodney admired the sight before realizing he didn't have to admire from a distance, he could get right up close to admire if he wanted to. He could even touch.
He could also wait until John finished looking at whatever it was he was studying out there, and then admire him inside the warm, dry jumper. He kept on thinking that as he unlaced his boots, pulled off his socks and rolled up his pants.
The water was indeed icy cold and Rodney's feet sank into the wet sand. But when John smiled over his shoulder, Rodney no longer noticed or cared. He reached John and asked, "What are you doing out here? Keeping an eye out for those elusive fish?"
"I'm done fishing for the day. Now I'm just watching the water."
"Not to mention getting wet," Rodney said, as water splashed up over their feet, "and cold."
John leaned back against Rodney's chest and guided Rodney's hand under his shirt and onto his stomach. "You're nice and warm."
"I'm a warm kind of guy." Rodney kissed the back of his neck, then licked the skin directly below his hairline. Water swirled around his ankles, making him sink deeper into the sand. "Ask anyone."
John snorted.
"What, is that funny?" Rodney nipped at his neck.
"Very." John pushed his ass against Rodney's groin. "I like funny."
"Should I be flattered?"
"Absolutely."
Truth was, Rodney was enormously flattered. John seemed to inexplicably like everything about him. He mouthed the side of John's neck. John's skin was cold and he tasted of the sea.
"I think there's a storm coming in. Surf's rough. Do those look like rain clouds to you?" John pointed out to the horizon.
Rodney peered over John's shoulder. All he saw was a dark shadow. "What am I, a weatherman now?"
John shrugged. "Just wondering. I'm not so fond of storms anymore."
His voice was quiet and Rodney barely heard him over the wind, but he understood. The thought of it brought a flood of memories, none of them pleasant. "We'll be fine in the jumper," he said, which was a pretty pointless thing to say, because John already knew that.
John lifted Rodney's left arm, tracing a finger along the pale, twisted scar remaining on his wrist. It used to bother Rodney how quickly he had broken, that it was a sign of weakness. But not anymore. Once the Wraith ships started coming, things like that didn't matter. He took John's hand in his, turning John around to face him. "It's faded," he said. "See? Can barely make it out anymore."
John's face was still troubled, much to Rodney's consternation. So Rodney kissed him, soft, gentle kisses, one hand cupping the side of his face. When John sighed and leaned into his touch, Rodney felt gratified. And when John kissed him harder, hugging him close and pressing his growing erection against Rodney's hip, Rodney was surprised and touched by John's response. He wouldn't have predicted that he could affect John this way, get him aroused and excited and make him stop thinking about what might have been.
Comfort had never exactly been Rodney's forte.
Rodney slid his hands down over John's ass, squeezing, and John moaned, clutching at Rodney's shoulders. Rodney dove in and kissed his neck, reaching down to stroke John's thickening cock.
"Rodney, please," John sighed. He pushed forward, into Rodney's hand.
Next thing Rodney knew he was down on his knees, in the icy surf, unzipping John's pants. He could hear John's laughing protestations, but John wasn't making any move to stop him. He freed John's erect cock from his boxers. It was all warmth and smooth skin in his hand, and he could feel John tremble as he took it into his mouth. He sucked down the length of the shaft and back up again, with slow, firm strokes of his tongue, over and over again, as John cupped his head with gentle hands. Rodney thought he heard John say something, but his voice was unintelligible over the wind. Rodney sucked harder, until John's hips jerked and his cock swelled in Rodney's mouth. A little more sucking and John quivered and flooded Rodney's mouth with warm come. Rodney swallowed him down eagerly and without hesitation.
When he finished, he rose to his feet, cold and numb from his knees on down. John chuckled, leaning on him. "I can't believe you did that after complaining about the cold." John hugged him and leaned against Rodney's chest, further unsteadying him.
"I can't believe it, either," Rodney said. "Because I think my feet are frozen into ice cubes. Can we go in now?"
"You mean you want your blowjob inside a nice, warm jumper?"
Rodney nodded. "That's exactly what I mean."
"I thought you were made of sterner stuff, Rodney."
"You do know this is me you're talking about?" Rodney pointed out, to John's laughter.
They didn't bother with their socks, just shoved their feet directly into their boots and slowly made their way back up to the jumper. Rodney's feet began to ache as the feeling in them returned, but before he could complain John had stripped him of his clothes and laid him down on the sleeping bags. His warm, wet mouth started at Rodney's feet, warming them, then worked his way up Rodney's legs. By the time it descended on his cock Rodney was no longer cold. And all he could think was that John was getting really, really good at blowing him. Astoundingly good.
Day 13.
The rain thrummed steadily on the roof, and a gust of wind rocked the craft. Nonetheless the only thing Rodney was aware of was John. John straddling his lap, John's hands stroking his cock. John's warm, sweaty body encompassing him. "Oh, god, you're wonderful," Rodney moaned. "Just what you're doing, it's good, good, good."
"Damn right I'm wonderful." John squeezed harder, rubbing his sunscreen-slicked thumb over the tip of Rodney's cock.
"Oh, jeeze--" Rodney tightened his hold around John's waist, pulling him closer, until he could feel the knuckles of John's hand rubbing against his stomach. "More. Do it faster." He raised his head and received a rough kiss, the force of it pushing him back against the bench. He tried to shove his hips up, wanting to thrust into John's fist but John's weight held him down. It was strangely exhilarating, trapped in the bench seat of the jumper by John. John could hold him and keep him there forever, as long as his clever hands kept moving, pulling up pleasure from deep inside his body.
"Like this?" John asked, picking up the pace with a twist of his wrist that left Rodney gasping.
"Oh, oh, yes, like that, like that."
"Or like this?" John slowed his movements, and leaning back to reach a second hand down to tug gently at Rodney's balls.
"That's--that's good, too." Rodney managed. "Oh god, do anything you want to me." Rodney truly meant it, and that was a little frightening. Then the thought was gone, because John was stroking both his balls and his cock and it all went spiraling out of control. He came with a loud moan, fingers scrambling at John's back.
Breathless and shaken, Rodney leaned his head back as the last waves of pleasure faded. He opened his eyes to see John watching him with a delighted grin. "Have I mentioned how much I like making you come?"
Rodney licked his lips, not sure if he could make his mouth work again. "Um", he said intelligently. He liked it too. He liked it a lot.
"It's fun. And satisfying." John furrowed his brow. "And it's much easier with guys. But mostly because it's you," he finished earnestly.
A small laugh bubbled up inside of Rodney. He was happy, because John liked having sex with him, because John was naked in his lap, because he was stuck in a jumper in the rain with a naked John who liked having sex with him. He pulled John's head down to his and kissed him.
"Does that mean you like it, too?" John asked when Rodney released him.
Rodney smiled. "It's like finding out wormhole travel exists all over again, that's how amazing it is."
John made a face. "Oookay," he said.
"Oh come on, didn't you get all excited when we first told you about it?" Rodney poked John's shoulder with a finger.
"No, I was overwhelmed and confused," John said. "Suddenly everyone was all excited and making a fuss over me, and I wasn't really sure why, except that this weird equipment kept responding to me, weird *alien* equipment that I could work with my mind, and *that* was pretty damn freaky."
"Please, don't remind me, I was incredibly jealous of you."
"Really? Of me?"
"Yes, of you, with your 'I'm so cool' hair and sexy slouch and hyperactive ancient gene." Rodney sighed. "I didn't know if I wanted to slap you or sleep with you."
John's smile bordered on smirk. "I was pretty sure you were an arrogant ass, but one who became oddly cute when excited. All I could think was thank god I gave up doing guys, because no way was I going to get a big dumb crush on you."
"Oh. Smart thinking." Rodney touched John's lips with a finger, then leaned in and kissed him.
"Not successful, by the way."
"Thank god."
"Not that this is a crush," John said quickly. "It might have started like that, because even though you were obnoxious you were smart and cute and would kind of bounce when you got excited, but then you know, it's like--not only that, okay?"
Rodney nodded. "Okay. Because--yeah, not only that." God, it was more than that, if John knew how much more he might panic, and that wouldn't be good, not when they were trapped in a small jumper together. "I'm just glad that you ended up there, touching equipment that you weren't supposed to. Serendipity. Not that I believe in such things."
"No, of course not."
"How did you end up at stationed at McMurdo anyway?" Rodney asked.
John stiffened in his arms. "I managed to piss off a few people," John said, his cool tone matching his body language.
"No kidding. You?"
"Shocking, isn't it?" John climbed off his lap, abruptly.
"All right, clearly, a bad subject," Rodney said, holding up his hand. He already missed the warmth of John's body. "Forget I asked." He watched as John turned away, wiping his hands on a towel. "So, looks like rain, huh?"
"Rodney," John started, and Rodney was startled by the sadness in his voice. But before John's could continue, the jumper's warning system beeped. "Huh. That's can't be good."
Rodney scrambled off the bench as John slid into the pilot's seat. Rodney took the one beside him. "Energy burst detected, source right below the horizon," Rodney said, calling up the readouts. He looked at John. "The gate was just activated."
John's face showed his dismay. "I'm thinking this isn't going to be a good thing."
Rodney nodded. "I'm glad we decided to stay cloaked." He watched as a blip appeared on the screen. "Crap. It's wraith. A wraith dart."
"I'm only seeing one so far."
They watched in silence, the red dot moving slowly across the schematic of the sky. Rodney became very aware of his naked ass on the seat, and that the seats weren't intended to be sat in naked. The fabric was rough and uncomfortable. He stole a glance at John, taking in the incongruity of his nakedness as he fiddled with the controls, expression grim. Somehow, he managed to look less naked than Rodney felt.
"Gate just deactivated," John informed him. "Still detecting only one dart."
"Right. Reconnaissance, you think? He's keeping a pretty high orbit." Rodney drummed his fingers on the console.
"Must be."
"If he doesn't leave, you know, if he stays on the planet for another 7 days, and it comes time to activate the gate--"
"I know, Rodney. We'll be detected," John said. "How is the weapons system looking?"
"If I have to power the weapons, it's possible the replacement conduit will blow, and we won't be able to power up the transmitter. Or maybe we can. I can't predict what's going to happen, not completely," Rodney finished, frustrated. Even though cloaked, he felt exposed as he watched the dart maintain orbit. He looked up through the windshield at the clouds and rain, as if expecting to see it appear in front of them.
"Well, let's hope that once he figures out no one is here, he'll leave." John turned to face Rodney, looking him up and down. "In the meanwhile, I think I'd feel more comfortable if we were dressed."
"Of course--uh--" Rodney almost addressed him as "Colonel" again, because the situation called for it, or at least he thought so until John surprised him by leaning over and pressing a hard, swift kiss on his lips. "John," he said. "Clothes. Good idea."
He did feel better once he was dressed, lacing up his boots, and, following John's lead, latching up his vest. "Colonel", he said, as they returned to their seats.
John shot him an odd look.
"Right," Rodney said under his breath.
They sat quietly, the sound of the rain filling the room. Then, staring at the screen, John spoke. "I disobeyed direct orders."
It took Rodney a moment to understand what John was referring to. "I'm sure you had good reason to," he finally said.
In an even, quiet voice, John told him everything, how he disobeyed orders because he had to rescue his people, but it all went wrong, and he ended up rescuing no one. His buddies were dead, and he found himself demoted, in deep trouble, with only a sympathetic commanding officer keeping him from being booted out completely.
He told Rodney how he liked being at McMurdo, because no one bothered him, and he wasn't responsible for anyone, how he wasn't expected to save them. Then he had been tapped to transport one General O'Neill to a research station, and everything had changed. Next thing he knew he was in Atlantis, shooting his own commanding officer.
Rodney's heart felt tight. "John, you had to--"
"I know, I know," John snapped. "But that doesn't make it any better, okay?"
"I'm sorry," Rodney said.
John fell silent.
"You kept us all alive," Rodney said at last. "Maybe you didn't want to be the hero, but you were, and you were damn good at it. Aside from that whole suicide run thing. Don't ever do that again, okay?"
"Rodney, I can't ever promise that." John didn't sound angry anymore.
"You could at least pretend to."
"Would it make you feel better?"
Rodney nodded. "Yes, it would."
John shook his head and his smile was sad. "Doesn't matter what I say. I can't save everyone. Hell, I couldn't save Ford. What if it's you next time?"
"If you can't save someone? Then they are unsavable."
John shook his head. "I can't believe that."
"You know what? You have a team. There are four of us--"
"And I’m sleeping with one of them."
"Yes, yes, the wisdom of which can be debated, but what I'm saying is, you can't go running off by yourself because you have to work with your team, because that's what being part of a team is all about." Rodney was sure that he was babbling now, and not making any sense at all, but he was also sure that Teyla and hell, even Ronon would say the exact same thing. "Think about it. Don't make us have to save you from yourself."
John leaned back in his chair. "And when did you become so soldierly?"
"Me?" Rodney asked, startled. "I'm no soldier. You know that."
But John kept looking at him, face speculative.
Day 15.
The dart remained in orbit for ten hours before leaving.
"Thank god," Rodney sighed, as the gate deactivated. "What the hell was he looking at? How long does it take to scan a planet? One that you already culled?"
"It makes you wonder. I don't think they're all of a kind, you know? Maybe one community had culled, and this guy didn't know it yet." John stood and stretched.
It looked like a good idea. Rodney stood and did the same, listening as his spine popped and joints crackled. They had remained at their stations the entire time, watching and waiting, listening to the rain, and now Rodney was restless and exhausted all at the same time.
"I don't know about you," John said, "but I need to get out of here for a while. The walls are closing in on me."
Rodney looked out the windshield at the steady rain. "You mean, like outside 'out of here'?" He thought John didn't like storms.
"That's exactly what I mean." John opened a locker and retrieved two rain ponchos. "Come on Rodney, a little water never hurt anyone." He tossed one to Rodney.
"Why do I always wind up getting wet with you?" Rodney griped, shaking out the poncho. He looked up to see John grinning slyly. "Oh, what are you, twelve?" Still, he smiled too. It was nice to have John being John again. He pulled the poncho over his head. "Shall we?"
Once they got out into the wind, Rodney had to hold the wildly flapping poncho close. The hood bothered him, restricting his vision, but when he pulled it down, the wind blew rainwater directly into his ear. "Great," Rodney muttered, pulling the hood back up.
They squelched through the grass, marching over the dunes. John walked fast, seemingly unfazed by the hood or the rain and the wind. Rodney had to hurry to keep up. It felt strangely exhilarating, to be out in the wind and the weather, the sound of the waves crashing on one side, the whistle of wind through grass and scrub on the other. The tide was high, the surf surging up to touch the base of the dunes, and water encompassed the entire beach area.
John stopped short. "Oh, damn it, the berries. I'll bet they got blown away."
"Don't tell me you were really going to eat those?"
"Yes, I was. Or, at least, taste them." John turned and headed for the path leading into the forested area.
As they traveled inland, the wind eased. They reached the area just past the stream, where they had previously found a low cluster of berry bushes and John shook his head, water dripping off his nose. They had been stripped clean of ripe berries, a few remaining green ones lingering on the lower branches "Aw, they're all gone," he cried out in dismay.
"That's all right. They were probably poisonous," Rodney told him.
"What is with you and the poison thing? You know, Rodney, not everything is out to get you."
"But it could be, hmmm? Better safe than sorry."
"Oh really? What about me, then? I'm definitely out to get you." John poked a finger into Rodney's chest.
"But that's completely different definition of 'get'." Rodney backed away as John advanced on him, because John was dripping wet, and he looked like trouble. "One that I actually like very much, even though it doesn't seem to be very safe."
"You're not sorry though, are you?" John smiled, blinking water out of his eyes.
"What do you think?"
John drew closer, still smiling.
"Oh, no, I'm going to end up soaking wet, aren't I?" Rodney came up short as his back touched against a tree.
John didn't stop until he was leaning right up against Rodney, pushing him against the tree. He pressed in to lick Rodney's cheek. "Maybe." He kissed Rodney's mouth delicately. "Probably."
John tasted like the rain, and Rodney clung to his poncho, moving into the kiss. John caressed his head, pushing Rodney's hood back. Cold water trickled down Rodney neck. "Oh, damn it--" Rodney yanked the hood back up.
"Sorry, that was an accident, I swear," John said, backing away with his hands up.
"Right." Rodney glared at him, but John's expression remained perfectly innocent.
"All right. No berries, no getting wet," John paused to sigh dramatically, "how about we head back?"
Rodney nodded, still wary. "Yes, thank you."
The trek back was into the wind, and Rodney had to narrow his eyes against the onslaught of the rain. His legs were wet from the knees down, his feet were soaked, and all he could think of was the nice dry jumper, with the warm, soft sleeping bags. And John, naked. Despite all the sex they'd had in the past five days, the idea of being naked with John still thrilled him. He didn't think the novelty of it would ever wear off. He didn't know if the same were true for John, if John would eventually lose interest. Although for some reason John seemed to like him a great deal, certainly more than any of his other lovers ever did. None of his other relationships were ever long-term, especially with the men--those relationships were basically only for the sex, and this was not like that at all. He was different, too, doing things he never thought he could, like stepping through a Stargate with a P90 in his hand. Therefore it was entirely possible, albeit improbable, that a genuine relationship might actually be occurring, and that was really cool.
He was brought out of his thoughts when he realized they had reached the dunes, and that he had unthinkingly followed John to the edge, overlooking the sea. The ocean was frothing below, waves splashing up directly below them.
"Wow," John shouted over the noise. "Pretty wild, huh?"
Rodney put a hand on John's shoulder. "We'd better be careful--it's possible the wave action has eroded the base of the dunes."
"What?"
"I said," Rodney shouted, struggling to be heard over the wind and crashing surf. "I think the--"
And then the ground beneath his feet gave way. Rodney flailed wildly, cursing as he slid down the crumbling slope onto his ass. Icy cold water rushed up to greet him, flowing up under his poncho, churning up the sand.
John had splashed down next to him. "Whoa," He righted himself with a great deal of splashing, then grabbed Rodney's arm. "Are you alright?" he shouted as the water receded.
Rodney glared as his initial panic faded and irritation set in. "Oh, just fine, I'm fine really, this is just *fine*." He climbed to his feet, tried to right his poncho, then finally pulled it off over his head in disgust. "Cold! This is cold, absolutely, no doubt about it, cold."
Another wave came up, almost knocking Rodney off his feet. It didn't help that John grabbed his arm again, tugging hard, throwing him off-balance. "Rodney, over here," John yelled. "We can climb this way."
It was rough going, the sand crumbling away beneath their feet. By the time they made it back to the top, Rodney's heart was pounding. His hands and knees were covered with sand, and he was soaked to the skin. "I knew I'd get wet out there," he yelled to John. "I could have stayed in the nice warm jumper, hiking has never been my thing. I don't know why I thought it would be."
John was ahead of him, patting his pockets with a look of consternation.
"What?" Rodney asked.
"You wouldn't have the remote opener for the jumper, would you?"
Rodney's heart dropped. "You're kidding me." Alarmed, he gazed in the direction of the cloaked, and very securely locked down jumper, then back down the dune at the water. "You've got to be kidding. No, I don't have it, you had it, and we cannot get into the jumper without it. I'm wet and miserable and cold and if you think I'm going down there to look for it you are absolutely insane--"
He turned back around and John, device in hand, was lowering the ramp of the decloaked jumper. "Just kidding," John said, with a bright grin.
Speechless, Rodney stared at John.
John's grin grew broader. "But you totally fell for it, didn't you?"
Rodney found his voice as he marched up the ramp. "I don't believe you," he burst out. "Of all the childish, ridiculous--I'm cold and wet and I have sand in my underwear, I'm *chafing* right now, damn it, and you--you--you're so--" Safely inside, he spun around and glared at John, who looked remarkably unrepentant, not to mention exceedingly proud of himself. "You know, you may be brave, you may insanely self-sacrificing and courageous but I'm coming to the conclusion you're also the biggest damn goof I've ever met." When John opened his mouth to speak, Rodney cut him short with a raised finger. "Ah--and don't deny the brave part, because you're sleeping with me, and if that doesn't say brave, I don't know what does."
John nodded, still grinning as he pulled off his poncho, his jacket, and then his shirt.
"Don't try and change the subject." Rodney's eyes dropped to John's bare chest. "Did I mention childish? And ridiculous?" he asked with a huff.
"I think you did." John unlaced his shoes and kicked them off.
"How about unrepentant? I'm definitely detecting a lack of repentance."
"I'm afraid you're right," John said. He unfastened his pants and then dropped first his pants and then his underwear down to his ankles.
"And that you've totally destroyed the mythical, heroic impression I had previously held of you?"
John peeled off his wet socks. "Good." He padded toward Rodney, starkly naked, sand smeared across one thigh, wet hair plastered against his head. "I'm me, Rodney," he said, arms spread. "Just--me."
"For which I'm profoundly thankful," Rodney said, and pulled him into a kiss, heedless of his own cold, wet clothes.
Day 17.
"Do it," John said, spreading his legs.
"If it feels uncomfortable, we can go back to what we were doing."
"Rodney, I said I wanted to try it, didn't I?"
"Yes, you did." Rodney slid his fingers behind John's balls, then, reaching further back, circled John's opening with a slick finger. When John sighed and lifted his hips, Rodney eased his fingertip inside. Muscles contracted, fighting the intrusion for a brief moment, then relaxed, allowing Rodney's finger to slide all the way in.
"Oh," John said. "Weird."
"It gets better, I promise." Rodney captured John's cock again with his mouth, sweeping his tongue along the underside while stroking John on the inside with his finger. John felt warm and smooth like silk, Rodney's finger moving easily as he pulled out and pushed back in.
"Mmm. I'm getting the 'better' part now." John pulled his knees up and spread his legs, lifting his hips further. "Wow. That's really...can you push harder?"
Pleased, Rodney reached in deep, his finger sliding over a slight bump, and John let out a strangled cry. "Ah, there it is. You know, I've never been quite sure before if I've actually located the prostate." Rodney ran his finger over it again, and looked up. "That was good, right?"
John stared down at him, panting. "Yes. Good."
"Hmmm. I thought so." Rodney moved his finger around some more, while cradling John's cock in his other hand and sucking down the side. Soon John began to squirm, shoving his ass down onto Rodney's hand, so Rodney decided it was time to work in a second finger, squeezing it in past his index finger. John grunted, digging his feet in and shoving his hips forward.
Rodney didn't bother to ask if that one was okay, too.
Instead he kept his mouth busy on John's balls, sucking lightly, first one, then the other, to John's moaned encouragement. Muscles trembled, then clenched and released around Rodney's fingers, and every time Rodney reached deep inside John let out a delighted gasp.
It was fun.
Rodney couldn't remember ever being this relaxed and comfortable with someone, taking the time to explore, to find out exactly what his partner liked. He actually couldn't remember being all that concerned over what he partner liked, being too busy with the "oh my god, I'm actually having sex" kind of thoughts to even consider it.
With John, things were different. He was finding it pretty damn cool that he could cause John to make all sorts of crazy noises, that he could suck on John's cock and shove with his fingers and John would squirm frantically beneath him.
As John's moans became shorter and more intense, Rodney backed off. He let John's cock slip from his mouth, and moved to lick and nip at John's thigh.
John grabbed his shoulder. "Rodney, oh god, please--don't stop," he pleaded, voice ragged.
"Stopping? Who said anything about stopping?" Rodney squeezed John's cock, then pulled it back to lick from John's balls all the way up to the head with one long swipe of the tongue. "I'm just taking my time, enjoying myself."
With a pained noise, John rocked down onto Rodney's hand. Rodney held his hand steady, letting John fuck himself, ass slamming against Rodney's hand. "Oh, god. Can you come like this?" Rodney asked.
"No," John whimpered. "I--I have to--" He grabbed his cock.
"Wait, wait--." But before Rodney could stop him, John brought himself off with three quick, hard strokes, his entire body stiffening, the muscles in his neck cording. Rodney felt an odd lurch in his stomach because it was an astonishing thing to see, John totally open and exposed, skin sheened with sweat, face twisted in a grimace of pleasure, hand wrapped around his cock and come oozing out between his fingers.
When John's body went limp, Rodney slid his fingers free, making John shake again. "Ooh, sorry," Rodney murmured, bending to kiss John's stomach.
John opened his eyes and gave a weak laugh. "S'okay. Especially after that."
Rodney ran his hand down John's thigh. "So, the finger-fucking goes on the list?"
John nodded. "I think it goes straight to the top of the list."
"This is going to be a long list." Rodney grabbed the nearby towel, wiped his hands, then handed it to John, who scrubbed lazily at his belly.
"Wow, totally wiped out." John stretched his arms out over his head, looking up at the ceiling. "Have you ever had this much sex before?"
Rodney snorted. "Not even close. Maybe if you added up all the sex I've ever had, it would equal this week."
"You said you thought I looked like I got a lot of sex." John poked Rodney with a toe. "Why is that?"
Rodney sighed. "Must you have such a good memory? Because you are good-looking, not to mention charming. And cocky. You have that whole cocky thing going on."
John grinned.
"Yeah, like that."
"Of course I'm cocky. I have a really cute boyfriend, and he's good in bed, too." He squeezed Rodney with his legs, knees bumping Rodney's arms.
"You're kind of nuts," Rodney said, flustered. "But I like it." He climbed over John's legs, and leaned down to kiss his mouth, which took a great deal of time to do properly. When he was done John simply smiled up at him, dopey and content. Rodney shook his head, not wanting to admit how much that look got under his skin. "I have to wash up, okay?"
He returned to find John under the blankets, eyes closed, chest exposed. Rodney crawled and laid down next him, sliding under the blankets and pressing himself against John's warm skin. John stirred, then rolled over, his ass tucked into Rodney's lap. Rodney put his arm around John's waist and rested his hand on John's chest.
"John," he whispered into the thick black hair tickling his nose. Then, "Colonel", even more quietly, just for the hell of it, just because it was almost funny to think how little he had actually seen of John before all this.
Day 20.
"Nervous?" John asked.
Rodney rubbed his hands together, leaning forward in his seat. "No." He took a breath. "Yes. Maybe."
"Me, too. But this is going to work."
Rodney watched the red blip move across the screen, edging slowly toward the vector indicating the range of the transmitter. "And how do you know that?"
"Because you'll make it work."
"No pressure, huh?"
"You're tough," John said with a wave of his hand. He was leaning back in his chair, the very picture of nonchalance. "You can handle it."
"I'm not tough. I'm soft and kind of squishy." Rodney wiped his palms on his thighs. "Okay, it's in range."
"Then let's do it."
Rodney dialed the sequence for home. "Dialing," he said, needlessly. He felt as though all the air had gone from the jumper.
"Try to do it right this time," John teased.
Rodney pressed the last symbol, and waited, watching the readouts. Then relief flooded his body. "It worked--the gate just activated. It worked," he said excitedly. He grinned at John. "We're going home."
John's head bobbed as he nodded rapidly. "We are. We really are. Nice job Rodney." He grinned back.
Rodney pointed to the mike. "Maybe we should say something?"
John's brows rose and his mouth made a little round "o" as he sat forward. Activating the mike, he announced, "Hello, Atlantis? This is Colonel Sheppard. Anybody home?"
Silence first, then Elizabeth's voice came though, her disbelief evident. "John? Oh my god, John is that you?"
"Yes, it is," John said smoothly. "And I've got McKay right here next to me. We seem to be in need of a lift home."
Rodney added, "Elizabeth, I'm transmitting the coordinates right now."
"Rodney? You're both all right. Wait--we're receiving the coordinates right now. Colonel, we didn't know what happened to you, how--?" Her voice rose in pitch then broke off.
Rodney could picture her face as she struggled for composure. His own throat got tight, and he felt a little guilty for having enjoyed himself so much while she had to cope with their disappearance.
"We're safe, and we've been safe, just stuck. The jumper is out of commission. And I'm sorry but we weren't able to make contact sooner," John told her.
"Sit tight," she said. "I have a team on the way."
They spoke a little further, then signed off. Rodney shut down the gate, falling back into his chair with a sigh of relief. His hands felt shaky as he rubbed his forehead, watching the screen until the gate activated again. "It's one of ours," Rodney informed John. "We're finally going home."
As they headed out the jumper, John took one last look around the tidied up interior. "We got rid of all the incriminating evidence, right?"
"Incriminating," Rodney said quietly. He knew that was what their relationship would become on Atlantis. It was going to be different between them from now on. It had to be.
Home
Rodney figured people would be happy to see them, but he wasn't prepared for level of enthusiasm that engulfed them the moment they stepped into the city. Elizabeth hugged them both, blinking rapidly, then hugged Rodney again. Teyla bumped her forehead against his and held him there, her delicate hands digging into his shoulders. Rodney saw Ronon grab John's shoulder and shake him like a puppy with a toy, grinning wildly. Rodney tried to dodge him, but Ronon was quick, and promptly did the same to him. Before Rodney could recover his balance Radek grabbed his hand and shook it, almost as roughly.
Everyone was talking at once, asking questions, demanding to know what happened to them, how they survived on the planet, and Rodney was pretty certain he caught something about "managing to survive without strangling each other". John smiled at everyone surrounding him, at ease with the all attention. The returning hero, enjoying himself.
Next thing Rodney knew Carson was hustling them into the infirmary for a checkup, despite Rodney's protestations that they were fine. "I'll be the judge of that," Carson told him sternly. "Now both of you, sit."
The curtain closed around him, and the usual exam took place--cold stethoscope, sharp needles, a bright light shining in his eyes. He was declared healthy, and his head, hard as a rock, with no ill effects from the blow.
Rodney could have told him that.
Just as Carson finished, Elizabeth returned, insisting they all go to the commissary for a bite to eat. Rodney was astonished to find they had pulled together an impromptu party, complete with a freshly baked cake. As he listened to Radek describe a new technology they had found in the city, a device they couldn't decipher, Rodney caught sight of John, draped over a chair across the room, laughing and talking with his compatriots.
Rodney couldn't shake off the odd feeling that the past three weeks were a dream. That they had never been naked together, that it was crazy to even think Lieutenant Colonel John Sheppard's mouth had been on his cock.
As soon as he could, Rodney begged off from the party, claiming exhaustion, that he only wanted a hot shower and to sleep in his own bed, which was the truth, at least partially. He was surprised to find himself escorted back to his room by a happy crowd, and when someone shoved a big plateful of cake into his hands as he said goodnight, he was touched and more than a little overwhelmed.
Finally, he was alone in his room, with his pictures of himself and his cat, clothes tossed about messily. "Home at last," he murmured. Back to normal. He had meetings the next day, he had reports to read, devices to figure out, missions in his future--nothing had changed.
He lingered under the shower for a half hour or more, the hot water relaxing his tense muscles, even though he would have preferred to be sitting in a cold stream on another planet. When he finished, he padded out into his room, barefoot, towel--a *clean* towel wrapped around his waist. "Oh," he said, as he caught sight of his visitor.
John stood in the middle of his room, freshly showered himself, in a clean tee-shirt and light-colored pants. "I let myself in," he said, only it was more of a question.
"I noticed. You being here, and all." Rodney's heart began to beat faster.
"It's nice to be home, isn't it?"
"Yes, it is."
John leaned one hip up against Rodney's desk. "Listen, I know we've been living in each other's back pockets, so you probably want to get some space to yourself." He idly traced a finger through the frosting on the slice of cake. "Not to mention I'm sure you have a ton of Rodney-type things to do, but I just wanted to stop in, and say 'goodnight' before I went to bed."
Rodney eyed the slouch, the studied coolness, the casual shrug, and tried not to smile. He might have been fooled by it at one time, but now he knew better. He marched up, slid one arm around John's waist, wrapped the other around his shoulders, and kissed him, hard, leaning into it and dipping John back. John hung onto him fiercely, his grip bruisingly tight.
"Space? Highly overrated," Rodney said, with a grin he suspected was pretty cocky. "How about I sweep you off your feet and into my bed, instead?"
John nodded rapidly. "That would be cool, too." He reached down to Rodney's waist. "Hey, look, your towel fell off. How'd that happen?"
"Oh, that was smooth," Rodney told him.
They stumbled toward the bed, hands getting entangled as they both tried to open John's pants.