(no subject)
im going to california soon. ahh. i miss my grandma. the way she smells. the way she laughs. the way she talks. my grandma is going to pass away soon. i can feel it. slowly, i see her get weaker and weaker. but her heart and mind remain the same. of course, i have faith in that. she is absolutely beautiful. stunning, this woman. she's never got uglier in my eyes. even when the skin around her throat stopped being so tight, when the lines around her eyes suddenly grew, she was still beautiful. she dyes her hair though. she's 80 something, and she still dyes her hair. yuck. im always telling her how beautiful she is and why does she dye her hair?? ew. *sighs* oh well. *chuckles* she says she enjoys it. ... allright then. :D
when my grandma dies, what am i going to do? oh im going to be sad. but life goes on. im going to remember her for all the things she taught me. im going to remember her for the person she is. the person she wanted me to me, (though at times i resented it, but i learned alot along the way). when i go to visit her, im going to be strong. oh its gonna be hard. she'll fuss if i start to cry. i hate it when she fusses. hahah. i get a little cut on my arm from brushing it a tad too hard against a wall, man this woman fusses. she wants to call the ambulance! no im not kidding. whew. there was a time when i choked on a fish bone. she was crying. oh my god. let me tell you it wasnt that bad. she almost called an ambulance. but i coughed it up. she fell to the floor clutching her heart telling me to come to her and she hugged me so tight, i was choking again. hahah. after that, she never cooked fish again. with a passion.
there was one time i was a little girl. we used to go to this park all the time. well i saw this dog alone way in the back of the park. i thought the doggy must be lonely im going to go right up to it and give it a hug. well what do you know the dog growled and bit me. it wasnt that bad. but jesus you should have seen my grandma. she was cursing everyone out on the park, WHOS DOG IS THIS! WHOS DOG IS THIS! WHY DID YOU LET MY BEAUTIFUL GRANDAUGHTER GET BIT! she was looking for someone to blame. after a minute of cursing and ranting, she finally took me to the hospital. afterwards, never took me to the park again. i told her it was allright. i made a mistake. i shouldnt have done that anyway. i liked that park. its a good thing that happened, i learned. she clutched my head and held it to her breasts and said, "oh, rosie. rosie.' hahah. she kept referring that park as "the bad park." *chuckles* and still to this day. when i mention it, she turns her head away in bitterness and curses under her breath. "no that was a bad park. you got bit by that dog remember??? i never took you there again!" then id be sorry i asked her cuz i would have to spend the next several minutes listening to how bad that park was. hahah.
and now its my turn to drive her around. its my turn to take her to the park. its my turn to make sure she puts on make up even if shes feeling bad. its my turn to compliment her. its my turn to look out for those doggies and those walls that might scrape her. and i do it with pride. i do it with the knowledge of the love we have for eachother. i do it because im thankful. i do it because i want to, and i love being around her.
when she dies. im going to thank the angels for taking her away at such a perfect time. im growing up. her hunsband has passed away, and she misses him sorely. and right now, me and her are coming to terms with eachother. we also have alot of issues with eachother. but ive learned how to treat them with delicacy, and she's learned how to treat them with patience. she's lead such a great life this woman. and she knows it. she's taught me that life is really simpler than it seems. she's taught me the beauty of things.
when she dies, im looking foward to the speech im going to give. its going to be a beautiful funeral. and im going to celebrate her death. i dont care how this looks, but this is the way it should be. especially with the life she has lead, and shes satisfied. and shes ready to pass away i think. the speech im going to give will be so beautiful, that even the angels will bow their heads and cry. hahah. that was horrible. <3 <3
when my grandma dies, what am i going to do? oh im going to be sad. but life goes on. im going to remember her for all the things she taught me. im going to remember her for the person she is. the person she wanted me to me, (though at times i resented it, but i learned alot along the way). when i go to visit her, im going to be strong. oh its gonna be hard. she'll fuss if i start to cry. i hate it when she fusses. hahah. i get a little cut on my arm from brushing it a tad too hard against a wall, man this woman fusses. she wants to call the ambulance! no im not kidding. whew. there was a time when i choked on a fish bone. she was crying. oh my god. let me tell you it wasnt that bad. she almost called an ambulance. but i coughed it up. she fell to the floor clutching her heart telling me to come to her and she hugged me so tight, i was choking again. hahah. after that, she never cooked fish again. with a passion.
there was one time i was a little girl. we used to go to this park all the time. well i saw this dog alone way in the back of the park. i thought the doggy must be lonely im going to go right up to it and give it a hug. well what do you know the dog growled and bit me. it wasnt that bad. but jesus you should have seen my grandma. she was cursing everyone out on the park, WHOS DOG IS THIS! WHOS DOG IS THIS! WHY DID YOU LET MY BEAUTIFUL GRANDAUGHTER GET BIT! she was looking for someone to blame. after a minute of cursing and ranting, she finally took me to the hospital. afterwards, never took me to the park again. i told her it was allright. i made a mistake. i shouldnt have done that anyway. i liked that park. its a good thing that happened, i learned. she clutched my head and held it to her breasts and said, "oh, rosie. rosie.' hahah. she kept referring that park as "the bad park." *chuckles* and still to this day. when i mention it, she turns her head away in bitterness and curses under her breath. "no that was a bad park. you got bit by that dog remember??? i never took you there again!" then id be sorry i asked her cuz i would have to spend the next several minutes listening to how bad that park was. hahah.
and now its my turn to drive her around. its my turn to take her to the park. its my turn to make sure she puts on make up even if shes feeling bad. its my turn to compliment her. its my turn to look out for those doggies and those walls that might scrape her. and i do it with pride. i do it with the knowledge of the love we have for eachother. i do it because im thankful. i do it because i want to, and i love being around her.
when she dies. im going to thank the angels for taking her away at such a perfect time. im growing up. her hunsband has passed away, and she misses him sorely. and right now, me and her are coming to terms with eachother. we also have alot of issues with eachother. but ive learned how to treat them with delicacy, and she's learned how to treat them with patience. she's lead such a great life this woman. and she knows it. she's taught me that life is really simpler than it seems. she's taught me the beauty of things.
when she dies, im looking foward to the speech im going to give. its going to be a beautiful funeral. and im going to celebrate her death. i dont care how this looks, but this is the way it should be. especially with the life she has lead, and shes satisfied. and shes ready to pass away i think. the speech im going to give will be so beautiful, that even the angels will bow their heads and cry. hahah. that was horrible. <3 <3