jtc
I met a new guy. Most amazing guy ive ever met. Treats me better than anyone ive ever been with. We have the best sex. BEST sex. And hes a freak so I don’t freak him out. We seem to fit so freaking well. Everytime youre supposed to say I love you or it felt right I said it in my head ever since the first night we were together. Its just that feeling you know? I have no idea how I can love him right now but I do. He is the greatest. Im completely nuts about him. I told him I love you to really sweet crickets if that makes sense. He didn’t say it back but it wasn’t like…bad bad cuz I know he has feelings for me. Hes still in love with his ex. Who treated him like shit and they didn’t…fit. Its so hard for me. Her shit is all over still and you know how I love that. Pfft. And he told me he still loves her. How much does this suck. He talked about how he feels like he could be with me forever….but hes still into her. Jkahdiuag ugh it hurts so bad. He says hes scared and that’s why he cant bring himself to say I love you too. But he has. He did last night. But idk maybe hes just sayin it cuz I did. Like im not scared too. Like I haven’t been hurt. I sure have! I told myself I would never let myself love someone after Michael. That he was it. Third time was the charm. Matt ben and Michael. I had 3 shots and none of them worked and I wasn’t gonna try again. Wasn’t even trying. But I cant help it and im so scared im gonna get so hurt. I wanna pull away but I cant. Although he does make it easier by always talking about her and showing me pics and stuff. Im not sure if he just wants me for sex either….but that would almost be okay because the sex is amazingggggggg. Ugh idk what to do. I want to be around him always but I feel like that’s worse.krghajugfhdfggsfajsgf I LOVE YOU!!