The Future
I've been really bothered lately about what the hell I'm doing with my life, feeling like I am just becoming a waste of space. So I figured I'd just rant here for a bit because it's been a while and, hey, it's almost therapeutic. (haha who's still reading this anyways really)
I read somewhere that it's good to think about what you ultimately want, and I realized I haven't done that in... a while. Lately, I haven't thought much about what kind of life I ultimately want to lead. I've just... been working, trying to manage, attempting to be independent, and hoping things get better. I realized this the other day, it occurred to me that I had no idea what I wanted. SO, let's try to establish that.
I'm looking back on my life, and there's one thing that has consistently been fulfilling time and again, and that's entertaining people. I love making people laugh, more than anything. Yeah, that's it. That's what I want to do with my life; I want to make people happy. Making others feel good, getting that reaction out of people... I'd never felt more accomplished in my life. But I have multiple venues and I can't friggin' pick one. I can draw funny crap, but I rarely ever get a reaction from it. On the other hand, acting (especially on stage) engages people directly and is guaranteed a reaction, and it's empowering. However, drawing is just more freeing in a way. Imagination runs rampant! I don't know.
What's more, I'm not terribly good at either.
Jack of all trades, master of none, you know how it is.
Aside from that, I really want to experience the world, see interesting, beautiful things and places, have crazy adventures, have fun, and have someone to share it all with! A cute girl with an appreciation of art and life and a bizarre sense of humor who likes to go out and DO STUFF but also can enjoy being lazy sometimes and is challenging and engaging and stubborn sometimes and will play in the rain and laugh without shame. SIGH.
Boy, it's nice to dream.
I read somewhere that it's good to think about what you ultimately want, and I realized I haven't done that in... a while. Lately, I haven't thought much about what kind of life I ultimately want to lead. I've just... been working, trying to manage, attempting to be independent, and hoping things get better. I realized this the other day, it occurred to me that I had no idea what I wanted. SO, let's try to establish that.
I'm looking back on my life, and there's one thing that has consistently been fulfilling time and again, and that's entertaining people. I love making people laugh, more than anything. Yeah, that's it. That's what I want to do with my life; I want to make people happy. Making others feel good, getting that reaction out of people... I'd never felt more accomplished in my life. But I have multiple venues and I can't friggin' pick one. I can draw funny crap, but I rarely ever get a reaction from it. On the other hand, acting (especially on stage) engages people directly and is guaranteed a reaction, and it's empowering. However, drawing is just more freeing in a way. Imagination runs rampant! I don't know.
What's more, I'm not terribly good at either.
Jack of all trades, master of none, you know how it is.
Aside from that, I really want to experience the world, see interesting, beautiful things and places, have crazy adventures, have fun, and have someone to share it all with! A cute girl with an appreciation of art and life and a bizarre sense of humor who likes to go out and DO STUFF but also can enjoy being lazy sometimes and is challenging and engaging and stubborn sometimes and will play in the rain and laugh without shame. SIGH.
Boy, it's nice to dream.