(no subject)

Jun 20, 2008 01:41

Just like rain in Forks, there was La Push, and Jacob Black.

He said he's always there to wait, but it had been literally half a century since we'd spoken. Edward had changed me, and Victoria killed him. My last act of vampirism was to kill her with my newborn strength, and I had done that with only my love for him in mind. That was the last time I'd ever spoken with a Cullen. When Edward was finally gone, the Cullens were gone too.

I had lost everything that meant life to me. Now my immortality was useless, and I wished for nothing but what Edward originally wanted me to have. The simple concept of an easy death.

Still, I was driving to nowhere, without a clue. I wanted to go somewhere, see something that might stir some hope. For the first time since the change took place, I felt absolutely helpless, and truly alone.

I spotted the road that led to the Cullen's home in Forks, but smelled nothing that said they had been there since. I couldn't imagine that house in its prime, with Esme as decorator and the family to inhabit it, making sure it was safe for a clumsy human being like me. It was more like a vampire haven now that they had left.

I didn't even bother seeing if anything had changed, for I knew what would happen. It would be like they had never been there in the first place.

I stopped, and pulled over. It was almost ironic, the fact that I was driving Edward's Volvo, when he was newly dead and I hated fast cars. I missed my truck, but I missed him more. I was going to my meadow.

Jump, duck, run. Twist, turn, weave. It was the mere act of running and jumping that ignited my feral senses. I was thirsty, but not that thirsty. I could wait. I remembered the last time I was here, and tears came to my eyes. Tears that couldn't be shed, for fear of blinding me.

It wasn't until I reached the meadow that I heard him.

"Bells, is that really you?" a soft rasping voice echoed around me. I sniffed the air, confirming that I wasn't going insane. Jacob Black was alive, and here in my meadow with me. I closed my eyes, wishing that I knew how to answer. I'm sorry, Jacob, Bella Swan doesn't exist anymore. Here, I'm a filthy bloodsucking leech that I'm sure repulses you simply by scent. Want a hug?

All I could muster was a whispered sob.

Jacob was a foot away from me in less than a second. His look radiated pain, and... joy? He was happy to see me? After all, I had broken his heart and basically left him for dead. His nose scrunched up, I could tell. "Bella, honey, why are you here? Where's... why... you know what I'm saying, right?" I forced myself to look up at him.

"Jake, Edward is dead. I'm all alone, and immortal. He changed me once we left for Juneau." I hung my head, barely able to breathe, even when I really didn't need to. "Not to sound cruel, but you kind of reek." I looked up immediately, my eyes slits. I could barely gasp, he had his arms around me.

"Please don't leave me again. I never imprinted, I never phased back. When you left with...him, I couldn't take being human. This is the first time I've walked on two legs since, Bells. I've been wolf this whole time."

It was only a few minutes until we were back in Forks, and I was crying. "Why can't we be simple again? It would be so much easier if we could just die, and be happy. Jake, I miss being human. Why can't we make things work?"
An awkward silence ensued.

"Technically, Bells, we aren't supposed to exist."

It was all uphill from there.

fanfiction

Previous post Next post
Up