All these pieces of me

May 15, 2007 08:43

It seems that, along with my inner hermit (who is quite the nature-goer, it appears; she led me to walk the dog around in the rain; needless to say, we are both very wet), my inner kitchen witch has come out. I thought it only a whim when I cleaned the bathroom; indeed, I did not stop for a break for I feared I'd never have the will to start again ( Read more... )

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thefinestmusic May 15 2007, 19:45:59 UTC
I'm hoping it is, but at the very least, it shall probably not hurt to try, and trying is better than sitting in the muck my self has decided to become.

(I actually identify as a pagan, too, though I'm very generalist about it and have yet to settle down and figure out how exactly I want this whole relation with the Higher Powers thing to go. I've got my morals and my philosophy, of course, but I haven't a name to put to it, though I'd like to find one, someday.

I suppose I've just dealt with too many people that- I suppose give the whole thing a bad name. There are the people who are in it because it's popular, there are the people that go 'OMG BURNING TIMES I'M OPPRESSED BECAUSE OF MY RELIGION,' the ones that think 'magic's going to solve all my problems!,' the ones that swear they've 'met Odin in ritual' and then have little freakouts because someone imagines him differently than they do...so I end up being very skeptical of anyone who says they are 'pagan.' I have a few pagan friends I do respect in terms of their beliefs, but that's because we've gone through and talked about it, and I can see that it's not any of those things, that they've got a sane head on their shoulders, and such.)

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gileonnen May 15 2007, 20:02:06 UTC
(Ah--that's totally understandable, and I know a few of these, as well. I'm inclined to believe that things take on the significance that we give them, and so working magic merely means imbuing items with significance (deciding that a clearing is sacred because you say it is, for instance) or acknowledging the significance that they already possess (using PineSol for a cleansing, for example). Most pagans tend not to like me because I'm so slapdash about everything--but I feel that life is inherently sacred, and everything we encounter is, too. You can put fancy names on something (Odin, the Holy Grail, sacred dagger), but if you do so, you have to acknowledge that you have given the things that you encounter those names. You have chosen to separate out these elements of your experience of the sacred world. In the end, you make your own way in the spiritual world, and you're better off acknowledging that straightaway than assuming that someone else's path and terminology will solve your problems.

... and that's my big pagan rant for the day. ^_~)

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thefinestmusic May 15 2007, 20:12:14 UTC
(...and a quite excellent one it is! :D It rather better explains something I've been thinking about for a long while. It ties into my belief about God- I use the singular because it's just easier when I'm not even sure of everything I've decided about him/her/them (and the male form, because hey, it's shorter and I have enough problems mistyping things) -; I think that God reaches out to us each in a different way, according to how we need it, and thus all our ways of reaching back are different. "Many paths to the peak of the mountain" sort of thing. Thus anyone saying, "You're doing it wrong!" rubs me the wrong way. XD

I think another part of my problem with most pagans is that I feel it's unbalanced. So many pagans are like, "OMGGODDESS!!!111!ELEVENTY-ONE! -- and oh yeah, there's the God, but he's her suitor and lover and totally not as important as she is." Which- a big part of my belief is that balance is everything, and also that it just ends up feeling like it's all because they're being anti-Christian, not pagan. Though I associate better with male authority figures a lot of times anyway, so maybe I'm biased.)

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gileonnen May 15 2007, 20:20:22 UTC
(Exactly, exactly--you make my day with that. ^___^

Me, I have real trouble with gender self-identification; although I've got a distinctly female body, and I dress it in a culturally female way, I identify as neither male nor female, and I'm not sure how other people can do otherwise--even though I acknowledge that they do. For this reason, I have a much easier time perceiving the divine/sacred in the world as genderless, and so the Goddess-preference rankles at me, too.)

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thefinestmusic May 15 2007, 20:29:21 UTC
(:D!

I can understand both, really, because I'm in the middle of the two myself. I haven't put much thought into gender self-identification, really, because I am physically female, I wouldn't be male if I had the choice, and rather content myself with luck of the draw. However, if we go by stereotypical mental setups, even the modern day ones, I'm extremely androgynous mentally. Thus I don't get alone well with either girly-girls or feminists and I don't manage to be a tomboy (though I admit to being a little wrestly at points >_>). I've never had much problem with it, per se, so I haven't analyzed it much; really, typing this is the most I've done.

I don't so much perceive said divine/sacred as being genderless; I think of it as both. I think gender is a major sliding scale, not a clean cut, so nothing's really genderless, it's just got some sort of balance between the two, even if that balance is dead neutral.)

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gileonnen May 15 2007, 20:38:26 UTC
(See, that gender-perception is what I don't understand. A friend once said, "So you'd be a 3 on the Kinsey Scale of gender?" To which I replied, with illustrations:

Say this is the scale, with masculine on one side and feminine on the other--

0---3---6

I am here. X

He didn't seem impressed by my disassociation from the continuum, but that's how I feel. ^_^;;)

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thefinestmusic May 15 2007, 20:44:49 UTC
(*snugs* I can't say I understand it, but I also don't see anything you'll be missing out on for lack of it.

Seriously, because I'm trying to think of something gender related to make a joke of you missing, but no, really, it's not with the coming. ;)

At least we can agree to be confused by each other?)

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gileonnen May 15 2007, 20:47:05 UTC
(*giggles* Sounds good! Although I'll just say, you're less confusing than most. I'm so very glad we friended one another!)

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thefinestmusic May 15 2007, 20:50:26 UTC
(I'm happy to hear it-! I feel I just go through my days being odd and confusing, sometimes. XD And I'm just as glad, if not more! It's so very rare I get to have conversations like this, and I enjoy them immensely. )

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dreamsofstars May 16 2007, 00:15:44 UTC
I am keeping Eris muzzled with great difficulty. *loves on*

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