TRUTH
After talking to Joel I realized exactly why I lie to people so much... its because Im afraid to let anyone get too close to me. Im afraid that theyll hurt me like all those before them. At least if someone leaves me their leaving the lies and not ME. I know its sad to say but its true. Ive not told the truth in a long time and its because Im afraid to get hurt. People always seem to leave you when you need them most and Im not prepared to let that happen to me again. My dad leaving broke me for such a long time that its been hard to let anyone in my life for real. But I realize that has to change. Im dying without true contact and I cant stand it anymore. I have to put everything in the past behind me and let go of the old pain and scars. Ive got to learn how to be ME and not lies that Ive come up with to block people out of my life. So starting now and from here on Im going to try to tell the truth.