It gets better.

[thefabone]

I recently joined a discussion with friends whether or not gay celebrities should come out of the closet. Some people say it wouldn't matter since "they're still the same person and I'm a fan of them, no matter if they're straight or gay". You can see the same reactions every time someone asks about an actor's sexual preference on IMDb. "It wouldn'

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[long_tianshi]

Enter Thomas Beatie and Balian Buschbaum. It was interesting to see how much controversy ensued over Thomas Beatie within the community itself. Can a transman bear a child after his transition and still (be allowed to) call himself trans? IMO it's very simple. Of course he can. It's his body, therefore it's his decision. And his alone. Honestly, how many men do you know who would, given the ability, bear a baby themselves because their girlfriend/wife couldn't? Probably not that many. So kudos to him. Can I identify with him? Do I feel properly represented to the public eye by him? Somewhat.

Now, Balian Buschbaum. Much controversy about him within the community as well. He's not ugly, he's not stupid, he's not a freak show. He looks like a "real" man. That's the blessing and the curse. Not every transman aspires to become a man's man. Some actually like their androgynous appearance or their feminine streaks. Some are gay, some are straight, some play for both teams. But the public tends to be stupid. If they only know Buschbaum and he is a (very outspoken) transman then surely every transman must be like that... There are other issues why not every transman is happy to see Balian on every other talk show but I digress.

I wonder what would happen if a wider public would be introduced to Buck Angel... lol

Lucky for me I don't have to find role models in celebs, partly because I don't really need them anymore and partly because I know some really cool transguys in real life to help me out on that front. And while I hope, more media present transmen will eventually lead to more understanding and acceptance, I won't hold my breath just now.

The one thing every young transman should know, though, and here having out and about celebrities certainly helps, there are very happy, successful men out there who just happen to have been born biologically female. And there even is a nifty little page out there to remind oursevles of that (http://ai.eecs.umich.edu/people/conway/TSsuccesses/TransMen.html) Not all of them are very media present but it's nice to know they are there.

So there. I apologize for this lengthy comment but I actually felt like I had something to say which doesn't happen too often :P

[thefabone]

Absolutely no need to apologize, I'm really, really thankful for these two comments since I didn't dare to speak for anyone else in my post. I'm sympathetic with other causes, but I'm not part of them and don't really have the insight. I've never even heard of Balian Buschbaum, only of Thomas Beatie.

Lucky for me I don't have to find role models in celebs, partly because I don't really need them anymore and partly because I know some really cool transguys in real life to help me out on that front.

That's great! I'm happy for you. That's the best case scenario.

I just wanna state once again that I've never said celebrities don't have the right to decide about their own coming out just because they're usually living a public life. I'm with you on that point.

And yeah, I often think the public got more accepting and coming outs generate less and less buzz, but then we still have news about teen bullying and gay suicides and violence against all sorts of identities. These are very confusing times we live in.

[long_tianshi]

That's great! I'm happy for you. That's the best case scenario.

It is and thank you :) I also had great luck in the way that testosterone enhanced the "Screw it, I'm doing things the way that feels right to *me*"-attitude I came with factory-set. lol

I just wanna state once again that I've never said celebrities don't have the right to decide about their own coming out just because they're usually living a public life.

I didn't want to imply you did and to be perfectly honest I wasn't too happy with the way I phrased that particular paragraph. But unfortunately, I had already hit post and couldn't edit it any more. :/

These are very confusing times we live in.

Too true. Here's hoping that it will get better indeed, on a grand scale. ;)