vip
Right, well, people are actually reading this, so i should start writing every once in a while, i'm somewhere with really expensive internet, so i'm going to cheat and just post a mass email i wrote the other day.
here it is:
I've been terrible about writing lately so thought I would just go the easy route and send a mass email. Just to update those for whom it's been a long while, I've been traveling around south east asia for the past three or four months, sometimes by myself, sometimes with family, and recently miriam joined up with me (if you want a brief of the last two years you can read this: http://upspolitics.blogspot.com/2007/02/julia-grant-05-all-across-asia.html). Some of you may have heard that last month I went to a ten day Vipassana course (non sectarian meditation course). I've been out for only two days now and it feels pretty surreal to look back on that time, it was really the most difficult and foreign experience. For ten days I wasn't allowed to talk (not even look someone in the eye), I two meals a day, one at six thirty and one at noon, with a snack at six. I would wake at 4am, meditate for two hours (well, actually, i ended up skipping the morning meditation a lot, closing your eyes so soon after opening them is a little tough), have breakfast, meditate for three hours, have lunch and an hour long break, meditate for four hours, have tea, meditate for two hours, have discussion, and go to bed at nine. That was exactly my day for nine days, the last day we only meditated for three hours, which seemed weird.
The grounds were beautiful, there was a canal around the perimeter, with lily pads, frogs, flowers, and so many deafening birds it was at times difficult to concentrate. There were two sides, the male and the female sides, and they were absolutely not to mix. There were different entry ways, even the color of the cushioned were segregated, though to me that made absolutely no sense. We all had our own rooms, very efficient wood-slab beds with thin mattresses and a table and stool. We also had "cells" which are little meditation rooms, though everyone is given theirs at different times. These are located in the pagoda, which is the coolest building I've ever been in.
In the back of the building, behind the meditation hall are layers of these cells (also segregated; women on the right, men on the left) and there are stair cases in odd places, leading to open spaces and hallways and rooms with unknown purposes. At the very top was a room where Goenka and his wife meditate, under the dome of the pagoda, and with cells for the teacher and assistant teachers connected by a slated door on each side. Exploring this building was the most external excitement i got the entire time.
The front half is the meditation hall, which is a wide open space with numbered cushions where we all meet. In the meditation hall everyone has their specific cushion and if anyone leaves in the week the cushion is simply removed, so little open spots suddenly appear throughout the week, and each time it feels like a miniature defeat. At the front are two large seats, for S.N. Goenka (the "teacher" though he's actually off in India somewhere doing something else) and in front of that is another smaller chair where our teacher sits. She doesn't do much besides for play the tapes where Goenka gives instructions and sings songs about Buddha and happiness and answer questions at certain times. There are fans all over, but they aren't turned on enough and I always end up sweating profusely throughout the day. Sometimes the heat and the monotony are too much and I end up sleeping just a little bit, though it's difficult when you're sitting up.
Sitting for 11 hours a day was the biggest struggle for the first two days. We sat on cushions on the floor, and everyone had their little way of folding the pillows to support their knees, butt, and what have you. But it was impossible to be comfortable for longer than ten minutes at the beginning, and the last two sessions were so painful I actually cried once. So I wanted to leave, all we did for the first three days was "observe respiration" that's 33 hours of breathing! One difficult part was that everyone else seemed to sit so comfortable, like little statues of Buddha. But me? I have terrible posture, and would only be cross legged for about ten minutes, after which i'd be tucking my legs this way and that, contorting my body as much as possible to alleviate the slightest bit of pain.
You might be a little surprised at how long I can go on about sitting, but it was the biggest struggle for those three days, and it's such a big part of your consciousness to get used to being in such a constant pain.
After sitting wasn't as big of a deal we progressed a bit in the meditation, and it became so much more difficult for me. I went through such a series of emotions, but I feel like I've come out a better person. Now I plan on continuing the practice, meditating once in the morning, and once in the evening, I find it weird that it can make such a difference, but this has actually been the most specific life changing thing I've ever done.
Of course I haven't done the course real justice, I don't really want to go into the specifics of what i felt or what we did, I can just sum it up by saying that it was wonderful, and i suggest that absolutely everyone does this. Of course it's hard, but it pays off so much.
So now I'm meditating once in the morning, and once at night, and it's made me a happier, more balanced person. I think it's just crazy that it would make a difference at all, but hey, you can't argue with what works whether it makes sense or not. I can say that I still don't believe in god, reincarnation, or any of that spiritual stuff, but I do believe that meditation helps for whatever reason... there's more to it than that, but it's just easier to simplify.
Right now i'm leaving bangkok, headed for the islands in the south, then I'll be going through malaysia and back to New Zealand (i hope) by early april. Yay! Then (for those who didn't know), I'll be enrolling in school to earn my teachers certificate, so in a year I'll be able to teach high school kids english. I'm really happy with my decision, I think it will help support a balanced and fulfilling life for me.
So for now, everything seems wonderful, I'll let you know how things turn out.
here it is:
I've been terrible about writing lately so thought I would just go the easy route and send a mass email. Just to update those for whom it's been a long while, I've been traveling around south east asia for the past three or four months, sometimes by myself, sometimes with family, and recently miriam joined up with me (if you want a brief of the last two years you can read this: http://upspolitics.blogspot.com/2007/02/julia-grant-05-all-across-asia.html). Some of you may have heard that last month I went to a ten day Vipassana course (non sectarian meditation course). I've been out for only two days now and it feels pretty surreal to look back on that time, it was really the most difficult and foreign experience. For ten days I wasn't allowed to talk (not even look someone in the eye), I two meals a day, one at six thirty and one at noon, with a snack at six. I would wake at 4am, meditate for two hours (well, actually, i ended up skipping the morning meditation a lot, closing your eyes so soon after opening them is a little tough), have breakfast, meditate for three hours, have lunch and an hour long break, meditate for four hours, have tea, meditate for two hours, have discussion, and go to bed at nine. That was exactly my day for nine days, the last day we only meditated for three hours, which seemed weird.
The grounds were beautiful, there was a canal around the perimeter, with lily pads, frogs, flowers, and so many deafening birds it was at times difficult to concentrate. There were two sides, the male and the female sides, and they were absolutely not to mix. There were different entry ways, even the color of the cushioned were segregated, though to me that made absolutely no sense. We all had our own rooms, very efficient wood-slab beds with thin mattresses and a table and stool. We also had "cells" which are little meditation rooms, though everyone is given theirs at different times. These are located in the pagoda, which is the coolest building I've ever been in.
In the back of the building, behind the meditation hall are layers of these cells (also segregated; women on the right, men on the left) and there are stair cases in odd places, leading to open spaces and hallways and rooms with unknown purposes. At the very top was a room where Goenka and his wife meditate, under the dome of the pagoda, and with cells for the teacher and assistant teachers connected by a slated door on each side. Exploring this building was the most external excitement i got the entire time.
The front half is the meditation hall, which is a wide open space with numbered cushions where we all meet. In the meditation hall everyone has their specific cushion and if anyone leaves in the week the cushion is simply removed, so little open spots suddenly appear throughout the week, and each time it feels like a miniature defeat. At the front are two large seats, for S.N. Goenka (the "teacher" though he's actually off in India somewhere doing something else) and in front of that is another smaller chair where our teacher sits. She doesn't do much besides for play the tapes where Goenka gives instructions and sings songs about Buddha and happiness and answer questions at certain times. There are fans all over, but they aren't turned on enough and I always end up sweating profusely throughout the day. Sometimes the heat and the monotony are too much and I end up sleeping just a little bit, though it's difficult when you're sitting up.
Sitting for 11 hours a day was the biggest struggle for the first two days. We sat on cushions on the floor, and everyone had their little way of folding the pillows to support their knees, butt, and what have you. But it was impossible to be comfortable for longer than ten minutes at the beginning, and the last two sessions were so painful I actually cried once. So I wanted to leave, all we did for the first three days was "observe respiration" that's 33 hours of breathing! One difficult part was that everyone else seemed to sit so comfortable, like little statues of Buddha. But me? I have terrible posture, and would only be cross legged for about ten minutes, after which i'd be tucking my legs this way and that, contorting my body as much as possible to alleviate the slightest bit of pain.
You might be a little surprised at how long I can go on about sitting, but it was the biggest struggle for those three days, and it's such a big part of your consciousness to get used to being in such a constant pain.
After sitting wasn't as big of a deal we progressed a bit in the meditation, and it became so much more difficult for me. I went through such a series of emotions, but I feel like I've come out a better person. Now I plan on continuing the practice, meditating once in the morning, and once in the evening, I find it weird that it can make such a difference, but this has actually been the most specific life changing thing I've ever done.
Of course I haven't done the course real justice, I don't really want to go into the specifics of what i felt or what we did, I can just sum it up by saying that it was wonderful, and i suggest that absolutely everyone does this. Of course it's hard, but it pays off so much.
So now I'm meditating once in the morning, and once at night, and it's made me a happier, more balanced person. I think it's just crazy that it would make a difference at all, but hey, you can't argue with what works whether it makes sense or not. I can say that I still don't believe in god, reincarnation, or any of that spiritual stuff, but I do believe that meditation helps for whatever reason... there's more to it than that, but it's just easier to simplify.
Right now i'm leaving bangkok, headed for the islands in the south, then I'll be going through malaysia and back to New Zealand (i hope) by early april. Yay! Then (for those who didn't know), I'll be enrolling in school to earn my teachers certificate, so in a year I'll be able to teach high school kids english. I'm really happy with my decision, I think it will help support a balanced and fulfilling life for me.
So for now, everything seems wonderful, I'll let you know how things turn out.