Milf wants a good time? Oh, she's got a good time.
So I step out my apartment and there's this gay dude walking this dog with this hot milf and the gay guy is like "Oh. My. God! Like....your fucking dog fucking loves me!" as I pass them, and then this girl stops mid-sentence talking about her dog and looks at me and goes "HEY GORGEOUS." She was slurring a little. There's this bar right next to where I live called Murphy's and they have these drinks that are incredibly strong. Like if you asked for some Jack, they'll give it to you in this giant glass. There's usually a bar fight around 2 a.m. I'm just waiting for it so I don't have to be awakened.
