the shoe's indecisiveness on whether or not to drop
Ok, so to make up for the slew of downer posts, I figure I'd post some bullets of some of the actual good things just to remind those that nothing is nearly as angsty-emo-y as it seems when I decide to write. The thing I keep telling anyone who reads through these is that whenever anything smacks of angsty, simply think of Soft Cell's "Bedsitter" and you're actually closer towards the truer vibe. Anyway, without further ado:
1. To solve the problem of making sure I don't feel deprived of creative output, energy this month will be put into procuring a desk to make a workspace of some kind. This will be my Xmas gift for myself. Most of the things that have needed to be cleared out are indeed cleared out. Desks I have in mind are around $30-50 on Craig's List granted there is the double issue of not necessarily having cash this month and needing a van to transport said desk. Nonetheless, baked goods are apparently just as good as paying money where borrowing a van is concerned and I have a talent of making anything good despite whatever allergy/dietary restriction gets thrown my way it seems. This is fine by me since thankfully spelt and brown rice flour are cheap and easier to obtain now.
2. I may have missed Blonde Redhead, but Dan has decided to take it upon himself to make sure I don't miss Peter Hook (that's right, THE Peter Hook) coming into town to perform Joy Division's "Unknown Pleasures" with guests. I owe him big for this. There's a bit of irony that I'll be going with Dan (of all people) to hear a performance of what's basically my "coming-out" album. Granted Hookie is nowhere near as he appeared in 1981, I'm still squeeing at the prospect of seeing him perform "Disorder" before my very eyes and ears.
3. I'm right now having my vacation time for next year scheduled and it seems I'll be making my way into Pittsburgh in June, presumably around my brother's birthday, when Spring finals are over and done with. I'm also thinking about spending another Halloween in ABQ and if all things go accordingly, I would like to make a trip to the UK and see zingibar in her new surroundings though I'm not sure when (summer/early fall maybe??). More on this as things flesh themselves out.
4. As for fellow I was angsting over? I won't get into it now, but let's say I started to take my own usual advice of not dating/dealing with assholes and I basically (but politely) told fellow to f*** off. Further musings will be for later, but I will say there was a bit of a realization after stumbling onto Curve's "Pink Girl With The Blues" for the first time in a long while that there are times when "I forget I'm strong and proud." Much of the angstiness surrounding that was mostly coming to that realization while putting my emotions on the line for people who don't deserve my doing such.
5. Xmas will be celebrated this year, granted my lack of cash will cause folks' gifts to be more creatively concocted.
6. I'm realizing that if I didn't tack on the second-language stuff, I'd be done with school in two more terms (I just had to add the second language, didn't I??). Still, I have a little bit more than a year left. Plus, there's apparently a stack of internships and potential job positions looking for folks with basic-to-intermediate Russian skills that I have to start poking through. I'm also now at the point where I have to start taking literature classes in Russian. I'm both thrilled and terrified about this, but I'll be reading Gogol in the original Russian.
I was going to write more, but this should suffice. There's still grocery shopping to do, then practicing with Dan afterwards, and my promising to step out to Hive for a drink. The sun has started to set by 4pm. I seem to be plenty prepared for the SAD this year.
1. To solve the problem of making sure I don't feel deprived of creative output, energy this month will be put into procuring a desk to make a workspace of some kind. This will be my Xmas gift for myself. Most of the things that have needed to be cleared out are indeed cleared out. Desks I have in mind are around $30-50 on Craig's List granted there is the double issue of not necessarily having cash this month and needing a van to transport said desk. Nonetheless, baked goods are apparently just as good as paying money where borrowing a van is concerned and I have a talent of making anything good despite whatever allergy/dietary restriction gets thrown my way it seems. This is fine by me since thankfully spelt and brown rice flour are cheap and easier to obtain now.
2. I may have missed Blonde Redhead, but Dan has decided to take it upon himself to make sure I don't miss Peter Hook (that's right, THE Peter Hook) coming into town to perform Joy Division's "Unknown Pleasures" with guests. I owe him big for this. There's a bit of irony that I'll be going with Dan (of all people) to hear a performance of what's basically my "coming-out" album. Granted Hookie is nowhere near as he appeared in 1981, I'm still squeeing at the prospect of seeing him perform "Disorder" before my very eyes and ears.
3. I'm right now having my vacation time for next year scheduled and it seems I'll be making my way into Pittsburgh in June, presumably around my brother's birthday, when Spring finals are over and done with. I'm also thinking about spending another Halloween in ABQ and if all things go accordingly, I would like to make a trip to the UK and see zingibar in her new surroundings though I'm not sure when (summer/early fall maybe??). More on this as things flesh themselves out.
4. As for fellow I was angsting over? I won't get into it now, but let's say I started to take my own usual advice of not dating/dealing with assholes and I basically (but politely) told fellow to f*** off. Further musings will be for later, but I will say there was a bit of a realization after stumbling onto Curve's "Pink Girl With The Blues" for the first time in a long while that there are times when "I forget I'm strong and proud." Much of the angstiness surrounding that was mostly coming to that realization while putting my emotions on the line for people who don't deserve my doing such.
5. Xmas will be celebrated this year, granted my lack of cash will cause folks' gifts to be more creatively concocted.
6. I'm realizing that if I didn't tack on the second-language stuff, I'd be done with school in two more terms (I just had to add the second language, didn't I??). Still, I have a little bit more than a year left. Plus, there's apparently a stack of internships and potential job positions looking for folks with basic-to-intermediate Russian skills that I have to start poking through. I'm also now at the point where I have to start taking literature classes in Russian. I'm both thrilled and terrified about this, but I'll be reading Gogol in the original Russian.
I was going to write more, but this should suffice. There's still grocery shopping to do, then practicing with Dan afterwards, and my promising to step out to Hive for a drink. The sun has started to set by 4pm. I seem to be plenty prepared for the SAD this year.