oh, how things have changed...

May 05, 2007 10:40

Haha, well, it didn't take long for me to reach a breaking point at work. This past week, on Monday, Alicia called after I scheduled her for a full day, and said that she had other appointments that day starting at 1pm-after, thus making it impossible for her to be at her afternoon appointments. This is all fine and good, but in my hurry to try to process everything that didn't get done in the previous week, I forgot to call the homeowners that we had scheduled appointments with and ask them if we could reschedule for Tuesday. That was a big no-no.

I know this whole fiasco was my fault, however I feel like I caught the end of a raw deal before this whole thing happened. Last week, on Thursday, after that full day of work when I felt like bawling again, I wrote an email to Tom and Kara about the situation. Granted, I didn't come right out and say "I AM OVERWHELMED AND NEED HELP," but I thought it was conveyed in the email.


That email.

Hi Kara and Tom,

I'm a little concerned about my time management skills at present, and was wondering if I could get some advice. In attempting to train Tracey to process Champaign orders, Peoria and Champaign both have suffered a bit in the "transition," so to speak. I know for certain that the billing hotsheets have fallen gravely behind in both markets, simply due to lack of time to complete them. Processing orders has slowed as well - I know that this is partially caused by my inept computer and having difficulties locating all the programs needed to get the new machine up to par - but at present, there are at least five Champaign orders that Alicia sent on Tuesday that have yet to be processed, as well as four Peoria orders sent either Tuesday or yesterday that are all in need of completion. Given that we're expecting at least another ten to fifteen orders in Champaign and Peoria to come in tomorrow, this is a bit unnerving to me.

I'm not sure how my time can be better spent to get these orders completed as soon as possible, so that is the area that I was looking for a bit of advice in. At present, I am processing as much as I can in the given day, but it just doesn't seem to be working as well as I feel it should (i.e. I feel that a lot more should be getting done than actually is). Again, I'm sure this is partially because, until today, I was without a computer of my own to work on and was jumping from open machine to open machine to complete what I couldn't. (This one seems to be up to par now - I am still in need of Adobe Acrobat, as I am unable to convert floor plans to .pdf documents and add watermarks to them. Otherwise I am good to go.)

If either of you have any bits of advice to help me out, I would greatly appreciate it - if not, I'll keep on doing the same as I have been, and see how things go.

Thanks a bunch,
-Joanne-

Anyway, I sent that email last week, on Thursday, and NEITHER ONE BOTHERED TO REPLY. That's what pissed me off the most. Even a reply that said "At the present, we need you to keep doing what you're doing until we hire more people" would have worked... but I received nada. Nothing. That really, really pissed me off.

Every day at work since that email I'd been on pins and needles, upset that neither superior in the office bothered to care about my situation, and also consistantly overwhelmed with the amount of work I do and exactly how much was not getting done. (The last few paychecks that I've received, I've wanted to cry... I know all of it goes to debts, loans, and bills, and then I'm left to work my ass off until the next pay period, when the next check goes toward bills in its entirety.) It's just... really frustrating to hear other people in the office saying at the end of the day "oh yay! I got all my stuff done!" when I have at least one-two days' worth of work still to be done, only to catch up to ground zero before the whole thing starts over again.

I like having a lot to do at work, but that was fucking rediculous.

At any rate, this past Tuesday of last week (notice that it didn't take long for me to fully lose it at work), I was only in the office for about 5 minutes (I was the first one there, again) and I took a call from a crabby homeowner, one that I'd forgotten to call about Alicia not being able to go there on Monday. I apologized, saying it was my fault that I didn't call to reschedule, but that lady kept me on the phone for close to 10 minutes, bitching about every last thing we do. And I lost it. 8:15 in the morning, and I lost it.

At that point, I was already bawling at work - Tracey was the only other one in the office at present, and here I was going on and on like "I'm overwhelmed," "This is fucking rediculous," "I sent a fucking email to Tom and Kara, and neither one bothered to reply," everything. I went to the bathroom and tried to calm myself down.

Later on that morning, about 10am or so, I took another call from a crabby homeowner, then the real estate agents' assistants that those owners had called after calling me, so I got to listen to what I'd done wrong about 10 different times or so. I lost it again - just crying this time, there were other people in the office. Dawn K. told me to go take a walk outside. I did.

After 15-20 minutes, I still felt like crying, and Tom met me before I went upstairs and we talked outside. He went on about how he knew he had put a lot of faith and work on my shoulders, and that "[we] have been leaning on you a lot in the last few months, because you're the best processor," but that he now knew that I had too much on my plate. (Gee, you remember that email I sent last week?) Long story short, he wanted to convey to me that he didn't want me to think that there was anybody in the office who didn't appreciate me, because I do a good job. That helped, but... when he said to me that if I'd felt this way, to let him know... it didn't click right away to mention that email I sent last week, and now I regret saying so. (Ah well, what can you do now?)

So, as of right now, I am not doing Champaign anymore, and not primarily training Tracey. I did take over Bloomington, and am learning, but balancing that and Peoria at present is the right amount of work for me. Tom also gave me a raise... imagine that. (It's kind of a good thing he did... when I was walking around before coming back, I just kept telling myself that no job should make me feel as stressed out as this one was at present... I know I probably stressed myself out about it a lot more than I should have, but I'm only 23 years old, damnit. Nothing should be that stressful in my life.)

Anyway... the rest of the week was better. I was sick on Thursday, all achy and stuff, but Friday went well. I even stayed until 6ish, but I got all my stuff done. Everything. I hadn't felt like that in a long time.

And now it's the weekend. :) Yay.

I think part of my outburst at work can be attributed to my birth control. Since I started working out again last November or so, I've had to switch birth control from the patch to two different pills. (I really miss the patch, because I didn't have any adverse effects from it, but when they started falling off after I was working out daily, I thought that I could no longer rely on it like I was. Haha, either work out to manage my weight, or stay on the patch and be lazy. Hmm.)

Anyway, the first set of pills I took, Ortho-Novum, made my heart pound, and the doc told me that my blood pressure was elevated... that's never happened before. Those pills I was on for a few months, during which time I felt... angry. I would drop something on the floor, and scream at the top of my lungs when no one else was in the house... or I'd do something else that shouldn't matter to me, maybe take out the trash and have something fall out of the bag onto the floor, and the same thing would happen. I knew that stuff was trivial, but couldn't stop myself from being so angry.

Sooo, I stopped taking those early one month (and was really, really scared for a few weeks, until my period came again, haha) and then I decided to try one other brand of pills, Levlen. These are worse... thankfully, today is the last pill to take before week 4. These make me weepy and my heart pound. Haha, yeah... those homeowners and realtors have been really getting to me for a few months, and I *know* they shouldn't. I *know* some people are just crabby and think they're always right. But I couldn't stop myself.

That one day I came home bawling from the office, Andrew came home for his lunch hour, and saw me... then I dropped a plate on the floor and shattered it, and cried more... haha, then I got mad at myself for getting so bent out of shape over a damn plate, which made me cry more... Andrew was just like "I'll abstain! Just get off those pills!" I kind of agree with that assessment.

So. Next week, I'm going in to the PP on Wednesday to find something different... I'd spoken to the last doctor about my symptoms, and she seemed to think that any birth control pill I'd take would do the same, since all primarily use the same hormones to regulate that stuff. She suggested Depo (the shot), which I'm kind-of eyeing now - those shots last for three months, so if any adverse effects come with it, I'm stuck with that one until the meds run their course. Hmm.

I'm going to do some research online about that one... as well as the low-dose pills out there. I know some don't use the same hormones as every other kind out there. (They might be meant for skinnier people though, I'm unsure.)

Haha, I was talking to my mom about all this, and she offered to teach me natural family planning... I was like... no. Thanks anyway. :) My mom's funny.

Anyway, that's been my past week. Things are looking up, though I'm very happy it's the weekend.

Prom Gone Wrong is next weekend, and I'm excited. :) I think the following weekend I'm going to take Thursday and Friday off (I've got the time), so that I can just get out of the office for a little while. Tom's graduation is the Sunday the week after Prom Gone Wrong, so I'll be home for that, as well as Lizzie's graduation party the Saturday before. I'm ready.

Anyway! That's all. I love and miss you all. Thanks for the comments on my last message too, they meant a lot. :)
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