Hell...
In...out...in...out...
It helped if she concentrated on her breathing. It helped her to concentrate on something other than the hairy belly inches away from her eyes. In the beginning she had tried to think of work, computer parts, theories...anything other than what was really going on. In the end, though, even the most complex problem couldn't keep the act out of her mind. It was all that she could do not to sigh, and she couldn't do that. Not now. No, it would interfere with technique. And he wouldn't allow anything to do that.
In...out...in...out...
It had always been like this, nothing special, nothing at all. She had always thought of herself as a sexless entity, nothing more than a martial creation that her father had made. Nothing more than a tool, much like the ones that she created for the military; a tool designed to bring nothing more than death and domination...and this. And why? Because you couldn't rape the willing.
She felt...numb inside. Hollow. A machine designed only for the use of others. An Automaton. Emotionless.
In...out...in...out...
His baton was slapping up against his side in time with the motion of his hips and her own movements. Up...down...up...down... It reminded her of the hands of a clock telling anyone who could read it that "Your Days are Numbered". Time was tick-tock-ticking away from her in the most boring way possible. Every day was the same. Orders. Research. Occasional operations where she would write out strategies for the people that were actually going to be there. Of course, she was never allowed to participate in those, not even in the Arrow. No...her place was in a lab with beakers and white boards and petrie dishes.
Or here...
In...out...in...out...
She was bored...cold...unfeeling. Beyond caring. Every machine has a breaking point, and today was her's. External stress and friction caused internal problems with any machine, and probably a lot sooner than she had. She was taught to be resilient. Yes, a very resilient meat machine. But a meat machine nonetheless.
In...out...in...out...
It was beginning, his uncontrollable frenzy of thrusting 4 minutes into the act. Like clockwork. It would be less than a minute before Bob would be finished, and then maybe she could go home. She put her hands on his hips in order to stave him off until the normal time. Like clockwork. Her mind wandered to give her something to do, wandering back to the laboratory that she had came from right before getting here again. Another day, another restricted area. But today it brought something new, a bright and shiny new deadly toxin that she had concealed in her pocket. The MPs hadn't even bothered to ask her what she was doing there, as she had been working late all this week. She even waved as she left, pretending to have some sort of feeling for the guys as she made her way to this moment here. It was a really beautiful agent, really. She had spent the whole week creating it just for him. A final act of devotion. It spread through mucous membrane contact and she couldn't wat to see the results. For the first time in a long time, she wanted to smile as his hips gyrated against her again.
In...out...IN...OUT...
5 minutes and 23 seconds...like clockwork. Here he came...ground zero...
She closed her eyes and swallowed for the last time...
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Eloise's eyes flew open and her hand flew instinctively towards her mouth. She took a deep breath and tried to sit up slowly. Her stomach heaved, and she covered her mouth harder as she crawled to the back of her room and opened the sliding rice paper wall. Below her, the Banana River flowed, swollen from the rains. With her sleeping kimono falling delicately off of her shoulders, the redheaded mage threw up into the water below, her stomach boiling as she thought of how easily she thought of killing someone else in her dream. How automated a response, how completely emotionless...
And the worst thing about it was, she knew that if she hadn't quit the Army, this might have actually been a reality...