Safe and alone
I think being single has its ups and downs.
For one-DO NOT bother talking to people in committed relationships about your mens(or womens). As soon as people find a person they settle down with(not alway forever) they think they write the book about finding the right guy. If something doesn't work out with the person you are currently smitten with, ah plenty of fish in the sea! Just move on to a new one. And for someone who has been in a committed relationship, trust me I KNOW that thought process and the desire to just push someone single to move on.
Um hello? Things don't work that easily. Some of us love without being loved in return. And it's the worst. Sometimes we think we find the loves of our lives and it fails. For me, I think I'm particularly strong but never given credit for it. And I'm going to shout out to the ladies in the same boat. I DON'T have kids who love me, I DON'T have my family near by, fuck I don't really feel I have that strong a close friend base. I don't have a great support system at all. I'm also surrounded by people who have all those things and don't have the understanding of what that's like. I'm not complaining, all I'm saying is, I'm in love with a good guy but who could never get over his fears enough to fully commit to me. I knew in my heart I deserved better. Annnd, I didn't settle, despite all the odds being against me, I moved myself on. I'm strong all on my own.
The thing is, I immediately feel this obligation that I should be going out to look for the right person for me, or whatever. But quite frankly I know I won't want to for a really long time. And I'm ok with that. For me, I joke about being a cat lady, but the thought DOESN"T depress me. Is that weird? I feel comforted? The only thing that does, is the fact that I feel pressure to want a person, what if I'm happy by myself? Is that allowed?
The truth is...I don't need a one person to spend every night with. I just want the comfort of friends and to spend time with people.
The idea of being with another guy is absolutely disgusting to me. And maybe that's weird to most people. But what if, after some point, you feel you are just over it all? Why isn't it okay to want to be single and surrounded by friends for a life time? The only thing that wants to keep me searching is the pressure society brings on a woman that being alone is the worst thing ever. I feel like I'm letting down "them" even if I myself I'm happy.
I want to be single. I want to be surrounded by great friends, but I want to be alone for a very long time. I'm disgusted with most men. I don't want to be told my Prince Charming will come along, cuz quite frankly shut up. That works for some people but not for others, is that really so bad? I don't think I get why being single seems to be the worst crime.
Don't try to change my mind, it will only irritate me. Maybe I just need time, but for now, I don't want to hear the Prince Charming talk, I just want to be safe and alone. I've always been my happiest...alone. And what's so damn wrong with that?
For one-DO NOT bother talking to people in committed relationships about your mens(or womens). As soon as people find a person they settle down with(not alway forever) they think they write the book about finding the right guy. If something doesn't work out with the person you are currently smitten with, ah plenty of fish in the sea! Just move on to a new one. And for someone who has been in a committed relationship, trust me I KNOW that thought process and the desire to just push someone single to move on.
Um hello? Things don't work that easily. Some of us love without being loved in return. And it's the worst. Sometimes we think we find the loves of our lives and it fails. For me, I think I'm particularly strong but never given credit for it. And I'm going to shout out to the ladies in the same boat. I DON'T have kids who love me, I DON'T have my family near by, fuck I don't really feel I have that strong a close friend base. I don't have a great support system at all. I'm also surrounded by people who have all those things and don't have the understanding of what that's like. I'm not complaining, all I'm saying is, I'm in love with a good guy but who could never get over his fears enough to fully commit to me. I knew in my heart I deserved better. Annnd, I didn't settle, despite all the odds being against me, I moved myself on. I'm strong all on my own.
The thing is, I immediately feel this obligation that I should be going out to look for the right person for me, or whatever. But quite frankly I know I won't want to for a really long time. And I'm ok with that. For me, I joke about being a cat lady, but the thought DOESN"T depress me. Is that weird? I feel comforted? The only thing that does, is the fact that I feel pressure to want a person, what if I'm happy by myself? Is that allowed?
The truth is...I don't need a one person to spend every night with. I just want the comfort of friends and to spend time with people.
The idea of being with another guy is absolutely disgusting to me. And maybe that's weird to most people. But what if, after some point, you feel you are just over it all? Why isn't it okay to want to be single and surrounded by friends for a life time? The only thing that wants to keep me searching is the pressure society brings on a woman that being alone is the worst thing ever. I feel like I'm letting down "them" even if I myself I'm happy.
I want to be single. I want to be surrounded by great friends, but I want to be alone for a very long time. I'm disgusted with most men. I don't want to be told my Prince Charming will come along, cuz quite frankly shut up. That works for some people but not for others, is that really so bad? I don't think I get why being single seems to be the worst crime.
Don't try to change my mind, it will only irritate me. Maybe I just need time, but for now, I don't want to hear the Prince Charming talk, I just want to be safe and alone. I've always been my happiest...alone. And what's so damn wrong with that?