Terezi: Prepare for your slow and unpleasant demise.

[lawfullibrarian]

It's been a couple days since your visit with Karkat, when you realized your sense of smell wasn't operating as well as it could have been. Your strange illness started to show new symptoms, progressing at a speed unheard of in troll pathology. Your belly expanded to the point where leaving the tree was simply inadvisable, for you were too clumsy

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[downassclown]

Gamzee is mercifully unaware of the weird shenanigans between Karkat and Terezi. Most of them, anyway. And the ones he knows about just amuse him to no end, because he is in complete awe of the insane miracles that led to his best friend finding a good dark romantic whatever it is. He doesn't know, but Karkat loves to talk about troll relationships, and for his part Gamzee tries hard to listen and not fall asleep because he's a good friend.

Sometimes he even succeeds.

But that's not important today.

Today Gamzee finds himself in the park for some reason. He's not sure when or how he got there, but it's fine. It's a warm afternoon and he was just enjoying the day when the sound of shrill troll screaming piques his curiosity. He swings himself up into Terezi's treehive and wanders through before finally poking his head in the bathroom with a cheerful "Honk honk, motherfucker."

If the bloody scene before him puts him off at all, he doesn't show it.

[lawfullibrarian]

Nnngh. Ugh, gog

[downassclown]

Gamzee follows her gaze to the egg and crouches down for a closer look. It smells like her, which isn't surprising, but it also makes him think of Karkat. He's vaguely aware of what he's looking at and thinks it's cool as hell, but it doesn't occur to him that this should not have happened. Life's just funny that way. Always throwing the most insane shit, and a smart motherfucker learns to roll with it.

"Nah, man, I just fuckin got up in here like a second ago."

He looks back up at her, decent or not, and grins.

"God damn, you want me to be all like bringing you a towel or some shit?"

[lawfullibrarian]

Breathe.

Exhale a big sigh of relief. It sure would be indignifying if anyone witnessed her grunting and screaming while pushing a tumor out and furiously typing into a poorly-balanced laptop as she's doing so

[downassclown]

Gamzee obediently gets up, nearly slipping in blood and assorted fluids, and edges around the toilet to check Terezi for monstrous protruding body parts or whatever it was she was looking for. Then he remembers something and gives her an apologetic shrug and a smile.

"Terezi, I don't really even like to have any idea what the motherfuckin' grub would even all look like."

Pause.

"Fuck, I mean the mother grub."

[lawfullibrarian]

Terezi looks nonplussed. Eh, if there's nothing immediately off then she guesses she's fine. She doesn't feel anything else inside her since that thing on the floor right now, and even pats down her gooshy empty belly to make sure. No more weird tumors, nothing, just soft fat. She is thankful.

But it still doesn't do anything about that egg on the floor. Not yet, anyway. She nudges it again, looking up at Gamzee. Not that she held any real stock in the juggalo as a reality check, he's still better than having nobody to ask questions at a time like this.

And he's certainly better to have around than Karkat right now.

"...Do you have any idea what this thing is? Besides a motherfucking miracle. Which it's not."

[downassclown]

"A mira--"

He laughs as he's cut off and feels a little sorry for her not being able to appreciate what a beautiful miracle he's gone back to staring at. But then again, he knows she's really smart, and after all it takes all kinds of trolls working together to make magic truly happen. He accepts her no-nonsense approach to problems even if he could never adopt it himself.

The egg pulses gently. There's something alive in there. And he's seen enough things in Alternia lay eggs to solve this mystery.

"I guess you all up and went and laid a fuckin' egg."

[lawfullibrarian]

"I hope you're fucking joking," Terezi frowns, knowing deep down this is exactly what had happened. For lack of any other logical explanation, she really did just went and laid a fuckin' egg. "You and I both know trolls can't lay eggs. That's the Mother Grub's thing. We only supply the genetics

[downassclown]

Gamzee is silent, listening to her work through this on her own. He's learned that a lot of his friends ask questions and make statements they don't really want a reply to, and anyway listening is a lot easier than trying to keep up with a rapidfire conversation.

He looks up at her, sleepily meeting her gaze, and shrugs mildly.

"'S got his fuckin smell all up on on it, though. I ain't gonna have to even being like opening my meal tunnel for him to know it's his."

[lawfullibrarian]

The female troll growls under her breath, still holding the egg to her like something precious. She really doesn't know why she feels this way, and in all honesty should just put it back down before she finds herself getting too attached to it. Still, did Gamzee think she was stupid or was he just--

Oh, right. It's Gamzee.

"Of course it's his and I don't know what he's going to do with it if he finds out." Without thinking she hugs the egg closer to her, curling protectively around it as she flashes her teeth at nothing in particular.

"I don't-- I don't know what to do with this stupid thing. Can you get my laptop out of the slime and talk to Moloch for me? He does that weird animal breeding stuff all the time, he probably has a better idea of what to do because I sure as fuck don't."

[downassclown]

Gamzee nods, but he goes for his own portable communication device instead of the bloody slime-drizzled laptop Terezi left on the bathroom floor.

terminallyCapricious [TC] began trolling adiosToreador [AT]

TC: HeY, mOtHeRfUcKiN BuLlHoNkEy
TC: YoU aRoUnD?
AT: oHHH, hOWDY THERE,
TC: Oh GoOd.
TC: ChEcK tHiS MoThErFuCkIn ShIt OuT
TC: Im aLl GeTtIn Up On My ChIlL aT TeReZiS kIcKiN pAd RiGhT
AT: yEAH, i HEAR YOU,
TC: AnD sHeS hElLa SaLtY tAlKiN bOuT hOw YoUd BeSt Be FiRiN uP tHaT mIrAcLe RiDe Of yOuRs AnD gEt OvEr HeRe.
TC: HaHaHaHaHaha.
AT: wAIT, uHHHHH, wHAT DID YOU JUST SAY,
TC: ShIt Is JuSt NoT eVeN tO bE bElIvEd, BrOsEiDoN.
TC: UHhHhHhH hAnG oN.
TC: oK
TC: sHe SaYs If YoU aRenT uP iN tHiS fInE aSs tReE iN tEn MinUtEs YoUrE a DeAd TroLl.
TC: SoMeThInG hApPeNeD dUdE
TC: iTs A mIrAcLe BuT nOt ThE kInD i wAs EvEn LiKe tO Be aLl KnOwInG aBoUt.
TC: oH
TC: aNd
TC: YoU hAvE tO pRoMiSe yOu WoN't TeLl KaRkAt AnYtHiNg.
AT: tHEN i NEED TO BE LEAVING RIGHT NOW BECAUSE i LIKE MY ABILITY TO BREATHE AND MOVE AND THINK AND, uHHHH, mOVE MY UPPER BODY,

[paraplegicrhino]

Moloch was telling the truth, almost immediately turning off his husktop before literally jetting from his balcony to the treehive that Terezi lived in. He didn't land his rocket-powered wheelchair on her mostly-flammable home, instead landing on a lift as he waited to be pulled up and level with everyone else. The troll was panting, as well, using all the force he could muster to propel his multi-wheeled ride to the location of his friends.

"Wha-What is the problem, are you hurt or-" Just as it began, the sentence stopped, Ahlkok's jaw agape as his eyes focused on Terezi and her strange new friend. "Uh.... Is... that it? I was expecting something more than you finding a, errr, ball. Gamzee made it sound like it was a really big issue." An honest opinion, not finding a lot about her spherical object to really be of note, save for how slimy it was and how messy the floor was. "Pl... Please tell me that isn't from the, ummm, toilet."

[lawfullibrarian]

The bull-troll is allowed to live another day. Terezi is thankful for the smell of chocolate and hay along with the creak of wheels on her floorboards, and it's a relief to find out he's just as in disbelief as she was. At least someone else is sane around here! It's so silly that she was almost ready to accept the fact that she laid an egg here.

"It-- it's not a ball, believe me," she tells him, uncurling herself and holding the egg out so Moloch can see it. It's not spherical at all, but kind of longish, like something that was designed to be tucked away in a cell until it hatched.

"From the toilet?" Terezi laughs sardonically, "Worse than that, Speedy. It's from my nook. I'd just throw it out the damn window if it came out of the toilet!"

[downassclown]

"It's a motherfuckin' egg," Gamzee supplies helpfully. "Fuckin miracles, Moloch, I'm tellin' you. First we all get this crazy place full of great people, then Terezi lays an egg. They just don't ever cease to be stopping."

Gamzee nods wisely at his wheelchair-bound friend. Everything he just said makes perfect sense to him.

[paraplegicrhino]

He blinked at the object, keeping his focus on it as he rolled a bit closer. From her arms, to the slime, to her own face, Moloch gulped and shivered, cracking a nervous smile at the blind girl. "W-Wh-what happened? Errr... What's happened in these past coupla' days, iffin' I may ask?" Worry was his only emotion at the time, heartbeat increasing slightly out of worry for what he would get as an answer.

"The-There's probly reasonin' fer this lil' thing, I reckon." Already his accent was pushing its way through, worry and anxiety forcing themselves to control his thought process.

[lawfullibrarian]

"That's a really good question!" Terezi begins to recap the past few days with Moloch, laying out in gross detail of every symptom that culminated to her sprawled out pantsless on this fucking bathroom floor wallowing in her own slime and blood with an unholy egg in her arms. She'd have mentioned the glitch if she thought it applied to her. Which it totally didn't. Really.

With that said, she really needs to get up off the floor now. And she needs to clean up.

"Hey, Gamzee... can you do me a big favor? On top of not telling Karkat about all this, can you get a towel or three?"

She shifts the egg over to one arm, bracing the other on the rim of the nearby bathtub and slowly, achingly rising to her feet. It hurts, and she doesn't go easy on her legs, but sitting there sprawled out simply didn't look good. Carefully making sure her feet aren't about to slip on the mess, she leans heavily on one side against the wall.

All this in the name of dignity.