TM: "There's enough sorrow in the world, isn't there, without trying to invent it."
(ooc: This response is based on the Five Years Gone episode of Heroes.)
She's not sure how long this will last. Everything that she hoped would be permanent in her life turned out to be temporary, and Claire knows that she only has herself to blame for it. Because of what she could do, her family had to go into hiding after the explosion. Her mom and brother tried to stick it out with her dad, but eventually it was too much to ask. They were being endangered for no reason; two innocent people paying for something that hadn't known they were signing up for until everyone was already in over their heads.
She would have been relieved for them when her mom had decided to move on if it hadn't felt like the last safe place in her life was being pulled out from under her. Even though she hadn't been allowed to be with them while they were together, knowing that she didn't have a family to go back to made the loneliness almost unbearable at times.
"Sandra, you're being awful quiet tonight. You okay?"
Claire looks over at Andy from the passenger seat of his truck, so lost in thought that she's not quite sure what was just said. Instead of admitting to once again being the girl with her head in the clouds, she gives him the best reassuring smile she can muster, and reaches over to brush her hand over his arm, her small engagement ring sparkling even in the dark.
Its not the life she thought she would have, but Andy makes her happy enough. He's good to her and he purposely does things that will make her smile. Her quiet moments are something he only teases her about out of concern, and he never pushes enough for her to have any reason to believe that he'll find out the truth about her.
That doesn't stop Claire from worrying that he will every single day, but it does make her want to try to move forward. It bothers her that he doesn't know her real name, but its Claire-Bear that she'd tell him about if she could. She'd also like to tell him about her mother's career breeding show dogs, and that her brother is so good at soccer that he got an athletic scholarship when he started in college despite having pretty crappy grades. If he could get to know the old Claire Bennet, she's almost positive that he would love her as much as he loves Sandra, but she'll never get to know for sure.
Thinking of these things doesn't do any good, but she's found that she can't not think of them when she's planning to walk down the aisle by herself instead of with her parents. The person who loves her thinks she's an orphan, not the biological offspring of the President of the United States and the daughter of Sandra and Noah Bennet. He doesn't know that the bravest man she ever met turned out to be her uncle, but if he knew how she failed Peter, he might wish they'd never met.
He won't have the chance to do that. He's not allowed to know her.
She studies Andy for a moment, until they stop at a red light and he notices that she's staring. Then she realizes she has to say something, and instead of trying to hide her thoughts, she gives herself a chance to voice this one. "Do you think we'll be together forever?," Claire asks, her tone unwavering and full of feigned hope.
He's going to lie to her and say yes, she knows that. Nothing can last in her world, no matter how much she wants it to. Eventually they're going to fall apart the same way that her parents did, there's no fighting that.
She'll never admit this, but its easier to love someone who you know you're going to lose than it is to lose someone who you thought would be around forever. All of the promises and wedding vows in the world won't change what she knows to be true, but they will let her pretend that it is, if only for a moment at a time.
"No, I proposed 'cause I think we'll be together for a week," he laughs, and Claire instantly feels a little better. "What do you think?"
"I think you should slow down," she replies, referring to the fact that he's going fifteen over the speed limit. "And I think I'd like forever." Her response is worded carefully, so that its not exactly a lie. She's better at lying now than telling the truth, but she tries to be honest wherever she can.
"Yes Ma'am," Andy teases, easing back on the gas pedal. "Now if you'd just pay half as much attention to me when I'm talking as you do when I'm driving..."
"I love you," Claire reminds him in a small voice, ruining the joke. When she thinks about how much she can't say, she tries to bring up the things that she can. She knows he considers it a little odd, just not odd enough to make him doubt her.
"I love you too."
For the moment, that's all she needs to hear.
Claire Bennet
Heroes
880 words
She's not sure how long this will last. Everything that she hoped would be permanent in her life turned out to be temporary, and Claire knows that she only has herself to blame for it. Because of what she could do, her family had to go into hiding after the explosion. Her mom and brother tried to stick it out with her dad, but eventually it was too much to ask. They were being endangered for no reason; two innocent people paying for something that hadn't known they were signing up for until everyone was already in over their heads.
She would have been relieved for them when her mom had decided to move on if it hadn't felt like the last safe place in her life was being pulled out from under her. Even though she hadn't been allowed to be with them while they were together, knowing that she didn't have a family to go back to made the loneliness almost unbearable at times.
"Sandra, you're being awful quiet tonight. You okay?"
Claire looks over at Andy from the passenger seat of his truck, so lost in thought that she's not quite sure what was just said. Instead of admitting to once again being the girl with her head in the clouds, she gives him the best reassuring smile she can muster, and reaches over to brush her hand over his arm, her small engagement ring sparkling even in the dark.
Its not the life she thought she would have, but Andy makes her happy enough. He's good to her and he purposely does things that will make her smile. Her quiet moments are something he only teases her about out of concern, and he never pushes enough for her to have any reason to believe that he'll find out the truth about her.
That doesn't stop Claire from worrying that he will every single day, but it does make her want to try to move forward. It bothers her that he doesn't know her real name, but its Claire-Bear that she'd tell him about if she could. She'd also like to tell him about her mother's career breeding show dogs, and that her brother is so good at soccer that he got an athletic scholarship when he started in college despite having pretty crappy grades. If he could get to know the old Claire Bennet, she's almost positive that he would love her as much as he loves Sandra, but she'll never get to know for sure.
Thinking of these things doesn't do any good, but she's found that she can't not think of them when she's planning to walk down the aisle by herself instead of with her parents. The person who loves her thinks she's an orphan, not the biological offspring of the President of the United States and the daughter of Sandra and Noah Bennet. He doesn't know that the bravest man she ever met turned out to be her uncle, but if he knew how she failed Peter, he might wish they'd never met.
He won't have the chance to do that. He's not allowed to know her.
She studies Andy for a moment, until they stop at a red light and he notices that she's staring. Then she realizes she has to say something, and instead of trying to hide her thoughts, she gives herself a chance to voice this one. "Do you think we'll be together forever?," Claire asks, her tone unwavering and full of feigned hope.
He's going to lie to her and say yes, she knows that. Nothing can last in her world, no matter how much she wants it to. Eventually they're going to fall apart the same way that her parents did, there's no fighting that.
She'll never admit this, but its easier to love someone who you know you're going to lose than it is to lose someone who you thought would be around forever. All of the promises and wedding vows in the world won't change what she knows to be true, but they will let her pretend that it is, if only for a moment at a time.
"No, I proposed 'cause I think we'll be together for a week," he laughs, and Claire instantly feels a little better. "What do you think?"
"I think you should slow down," she replies, referring to the fact that he's going fifteen over the speed limit. "And I think I'd like forever." Her response is worded carefully, so that its not exactly a lie. She's better at lying now than telling the truth, but she tries to be honest wherever she can.
"Yes Ma'am," Andy teases, easing back on the gas pedal. "Now if you'd just pay half as much attention to me when I'm talking as you do when I'm driving..."
"I love you," Claire reminds him in a small voice, ruining the joke. When she thinks about how much she can't say, she tries to bring up the things that she can. She knows he considers it a little odd, just not odd enough to make him doubt her.
"I love you too."
For the moment, that's all she needs to hear.
Claire Bennet
Heroes
880 words