(no subject)
so here's the thing.
something is missing. everything seems ok, but something's missing. and the closer i get to figuring myself out, the more i realize that if i finally get the courage to take the thing im missing, everything could change forever. and it might even be too late.
i know thats so vague but its the best i can do for now.
i feel like things are coming together. i feel like im not dwelling on the wrong things anymore and im relieved by it. college has been good for me. its been really good.
i feel like im ready for christmas though. im ready to watch its a wonderful life and to make christmas cookies and to have peppermint hot chocolates at starbucks with ari. i. am. so. ready.
its weird how pirates of the caribbean is like, a christmas movie to me now. that and lord of the rings. because i watched them around christmas.
i miss billy. :(
i miss high school a little bit tonite. its weird how you can love college and miss high school at the same time. because they're two totally different worlds and you cant live in both.
i feel like im focused on is numbers numbers numbers that dont matter and time thats not really wasted but has given me so much even though i couldnt appreciate it at the time. its weird how im eighteen and yet really nostalgic, feeling like my life is just starting but in a way is ending.
im not trying to be deep or anything. this is totally contradictory and stupid and i should stop soon.
emo emo emo emo emo emo
tired tired tired tired
!
something is missing. everything seems ok, but something's missing. and the closer i get to figuring myself out, the more i realize that if i finally get the courage to take the thing im missing, everything could change forever. and it might even be too late.
i know thats so vague but its the best i can do for now.
i feel like things are coming together. i feel like im not dwelling on the wrong things anymore and im relieved by it. college has been good for me. its been really good.
i feel like im ready for christmas though. im ready to watch its a wonderful life and to make christmas cookies and to have peppermint hot chocolates at starbucks with ari. i. am. so. ready.
its weird how pirates of the caribbean is like, a christmas movie to me now. that and lord of the rings. because i watched them around christmas.
i miss billy. :(
i miss high school a little bit tonite. its weird how you can love college and miss high school at the same time. because they're two totally different worlds and you cant live in both.
i feel like im focused on is numbers numbers numbers that dont matter and time thats not really wasted but has given me so much even though i couldnt appreciate it at the time. its weird how im eighteen and yet really nostalgic, feeling like my life is just starting but in a way is ending.
im not trying to be deep or anything. this is totally contradictory and stupid and i should stop soon.
emo emo emo emo emo emo
tired tired tired tired
!