shock treatment
"I do this thing where I think I'm real sick, but I won't go to the doctor to find out about it, because they make you sterile still in a real small space, while they chart up your insides and put them on display,...they'd see all of it, all of me,...all the good that won't come out of me, and all the stupid lie's I hide behind, it's such a big mistake, lying here on your warm embrace..."
-rilo kiley/Jenny Lewis.
I am still obsessed with Rilo Kiley.
Honestly, more likely because I can relate to a lot of random verses in her songs. For instance that one. I have been so abnormal these past two weeks. My head is a mess, my heart beats really fast at weird times and it hurts because it make it so hard to breathe, and my vision has gone to shit. I'm so fucking sick of telling myself, "Oh Lydia, Pray to God, and ask him for forgiveness! No more cocaine for you, and no cigarettes either!" I over-did it this last time, it was a three day period. I got too many bloody noses, and I don't feel right anymore. I just want to get as far away as I can from that shit.
It's strange, I've been painting, drawing, and writing so much lately. It feels good. I recently trapped myself in my room for one whole day, just painting. It was beautiful. The music I've been obsessing over lately goes good to put me in a artsy mood. 1.) The Mars Volta- Amputecture. Their new cd is genius, I'm absolutely in love with every single fucking song on that cd. Not to mention cedric's voice is AHHH! Orgasm. Beautiful man. 2.)Sage Francis all around, plain and simple. Might I say poetic meaning and tradgedy and everything I've ever felt wrapped up into so many songs of this man. He is awesome. 3.)Rilo Kiley, Jenny Lewis = very relateale. 4.)Atmosphere, I respect Slug as a rapper, and person very much, Lucy Ford is my favorite cd. 5.)A combination of the new blood brothers cd, and fear before's new cd. Pure fucking LYDIA MUSIC. Both of those cd's are amazing.
Music and art are very important to me, and lately, it's just so wonderful to be depending on them so much again during my free time.
My relationship with Alicia still remains unbreakable and unchangable. We are like two peas in a pod, literally. No, seriously. Not even a cheesey reference. Haha. I love the girl to death. We've been rather intoxicated wayyyy too much within the last two months. I hate to think that we'd become alcoholics, which was almost that level of concern, but we aren't. We just love being fucked up. It's so draining though. I could care less what anyone's opinions are about that either. Some people don't feel they need alcohol, or getting drunk is so stupid, I laugh at those people. Not because of their morals, no I respect that, I just laugh at how funny they look when I'm drunk and they are sober. It's great.
I no longer work at Whole Foods. The place of dramatics, and over-priced food. I became a traitor! I now work at trader joe's. They pay good money, and it's a smaller store, and you do so many different things. Althought, I am really sore from working. Bleh. I want money. I'm buying some new Frankie B's, their grey and very skinny at the bottom, DUH. I haven't really bought anything new lately, I'm just kin've easy-going, and I take like 2 minutes to decide what I'm going wear each day. It's easy.
Jake and I have been hanging out lately. I love the guy, what can I say? He's passionate, a great kisser, he makes me tingle from my head to my toes, he makes my vagina wet into two seconds of kissing him, HAHA, it's beautiful. We had sex the other day, and my vagina was so sore. I love it though, he has a huge dick, and it makes me so happy :]
I want to change my hair, I'm not sure what kind've change I want yet though. I'm also investing in buying black high rise UGGS. I'm probably going to get them next paycheck, my feet are always freezing when I go out. I need new leggings too. Wow, I've written alot. I think I should go to bed now...I wish I had weed, I would smoke myself out, and sleep so nicely....ah well. Goodnight(morning)if anyone reads this...
-rilo kiley/Jenny Lewis.
I am still obsessed with Rilo Kiley.
Honestly, more likely because I can relate to a lot of random verses in her songs. For instance that one. I have been so abnormal these past two weeks. My head is a mess, my heart beats really fast at weird times and it hurts because it make it so hard to breathe, and my vision has gone to shit. I'm so fucking sick of telling myself, "Oh Lydia, Pray to God, and ask him for forgiveness! No more cocaine for you, and no cigarettes either!" I over-did it this last time, it was a three day period. I got too many bloody noses, and I don't feel right anymore. I just want to get as far away as I can from that shit.
It's strange, I've been painting, drawing, and writing so much lately. It feels good. I recently trapped myself in my room for one whole day, just painting. It was beautiful. The music I've been obsessing over lately goes good to put me in a artsy mood. 1.) The Mars Volta- Amputecture. Their new cd is genius, I'm absolutely in love with every single fucking song on that cd. Not to mention cedric's voice is AHHH! Orgasm. Beautiful man. 2.)Sage Francis all around, plain and simple. Might I say poetic meaning and tradgedy and everything I've ever felt wrapped up into so many songs of this man. He is awesome. 3.)Rilo Kiley, Jenny Lewis = very relateale. 4.)Atmosphere, I respect Slug as a rapper, and person very much, Lucy Ford is my favorite cd. 5.)A combination of the new blood brothers cd, and fear before's new cd. Pure fucking LYDIA MUSIC. Both of those cd's are amazing.
Music and art are very important to me, and lately, it's just so wonderful to be depending on them so much again during my free time.
My relationship with Alicia still remains unbreakable and unchangable. We are like two peas in a pod, literally. No, seriously. Not even a cheesey reference. Haha. I love the girl to death. We've been rather intoxicated wayyyy too much within the last two months. I hate to think that we'd become alcoholics, which was almost that level of concern, but we aren't. We just love being fucked up. It's so draining though. I could care less what anyone's opinions are about that either. Some people don't feel they need alcohol, or getting drunk is so stupid, I laugh at those people. Not because of their morals, no I respect that, I just laugh at how funny they look when I'm drunk and they are sober. It's great.
I no longer work at Whole Foods. The place of dramatics, and over-priced food. I became a traitor! I now work at trader joe's. They pay good money, and it's a smaller store, and you do so many different things. Althought, I am really sore from working. Bleh. I want money. I'm buying some new Frankie B's, their grey and very skinny at the bottom, DUH. I haven't really bought anything new lately, I'm just kin've easy-going, and I take like 2 minutes to decide what I'm going wear each day. It's easy.
Jake and I have been hanging out lately. I love the guy, what can I say? He's passionate, a great kisser, he makes me tingle from my head to my toes, he makes my vagina wet into two seconds of kissing him, HAHA, it's beautiful. We had sex the other day, and my vagina was so sore. I love it though, he has a huge dick, and it makes me so happy :]
I want to change my hair, I'm not sure what kind've change I want yet though. I'm also investing in buying black high rise UGGS. I'm probably going to get them next paycheck, my feet are always freezing when I go out. I need new leggings too. Wow, I've written alot. I think I should go to bed now...I wish I had weed, I would smoke myself out, and sleep so nicely....ah well. Goodnight(morning)if anyone reads this...