Straw Wife
Title: Straw Wife
Author: 4thlaw
Fandom: Philadelphia Phillies
Pairing: Pat Burrell/Chase Utley
Rating: R-ish?
Summary: Michelle Burrell tells it from her point of view.
Disclaimer: I've said it before and I'll say it again, it's fiction. I made it up.
Straw Wife
Have you ever heard of a Straw Man? It’s a thing they do in debates, where they make a point that’s totally false just so they can refute it. It’s all for show.
Well, I’m a Straw Wife. I’m a total fraud. The good thing is, I don’t care. I knew it when we got married. Oh, I say Pat is “my husband,” and I guess technically he is, but he’s not really mine, he’s Chase’s.
It doesn’t bother me. I never loved Pat anyway. Yeah, he’s so handsome it drips off him, all my friends are jealous, it’s fun to show him off, but that’s about it. I’m his cover, and in return he gives me anything-everything-I want. I have my own fun, but it’s deep under cover, just like his.
I only ever saw them together once. Not too long after we got married. Did you ever wonder why Pat made such a big deal out of proposing? He had pictures published and everything. Well, it wasn’t because we were so in love. Although I think we do a pretty good job of faking it. A Straw Couple.
Anyway, I came home early that time and as I walked through the front of the house I saw them. They were on the couch, making out. Chase was on top of Pat. His shirt was off and I could see that his body was pretty much what I thought it’d be like, slender, and pretty rather than handsome.
Anyway, they were kissing, really hard and deep, and Pat’s hands were on Chase’s back, then on his butt. Then he brought his hands around and started undoing Chase’s fly. I could hear them making little sounds and whispering to each other, and I could see the weight of Chase’s body on Pat’s. Then Pat’s hands slipped under Chase’s jeans, pushing them down, and caressing his butt. It was sexy. Like gay porn, you know? Two good-looking guys doing things to each other, how could that not be hot?
I saw Chase undo Pat’s fly, and lower himself down and start to move against Pat. Then, Pat’s finger, sliding inside of Chase. I thought, if I didn’t get out of there and they saw me, they would be so embarrassed. But it was hard not to look.
So I just stood there, peeking behind the wall, holding my breath. They were moving faster, and breathing hard, their eyes were closed. I could see their bodies getting more and more tense, and then Chase’s back snapped like a branch and Pat pushed up underneath him. They both groaned out loud, and I knew what was happening. Then I figured I better make my escape, while they were in la-la land and wouldn’t notice. I snuck back out of the house and didn’t come in again until the time I had originally said I’d be back. Chase was gone by then. I admired them for being so discreet, and I promised myself I’d be that way too, so nobody would be embarrassed.
They were really hot together, but you’d never know, would you? I think of it as being like a pearl. A real pearl is layers of mother-of-pearl over a plain old grain of sand. Pat and Chase have sort of the opposite-a core of sexy love covered up by many layers of fake normality. I’m the top layer right now. Would you think a newly married man, who had a reputation as a big-time womanizer, had a secret lover who was a man? No, you would think, “He must be so in love with her, he doesn’t even want to party any more, he’d rather go home to her.” You wouldn’t think he was stealing away with his teammate to make love. It’s really too bad they can’t be open about it. But if they did, their world would be destroyed. I think it’s silly that anyone even cares. Why shouldn’t they just be able to love each other, like they really do?
So that is where I came in. He knew he could trust me. He told me right up front this is how it’s going to be, and I said fine. So it works. Even though we’ve never even slept in the same bed together, never made love. You might think it makes me sad, but actually I’m happy. Happy for them, that they can at least be together. And I can’t lie, I’m happy for me, that I have such a great lifestyle. I can do what I want, as long as I keep it under wraps, and I’ll never have to worry about money again.
It’s pretty unreal, I guess. A Straw Life. But so what? Nobody would believe the truth anyway. And Pat and Chase can love each other just like they want to, courtesy of me, the Straw Wife.
Author: 4thlaw
Fandom: Philadelphia Phillies
Pairing: Pat Burrell/Chase Utley
Rating: R-ish?
Summary: Michelle Burrell tells it from her point of view.
Disclaimer: I've said it before and I'll say it again, it's fiction. I made it up.
Straw Wife
Have you ever heard of a Straw Man? It’s a thing they do in debates, where they make a point that’s totally false just so they can refute it. It’s all for show.
Well, I’m a Straw Wife. I’m a total fraud. The good thing is, I don’t care. I knew it when we got married. Oh, I say Pat is “my husband,” and I guess technically he is, but he’s not really mine, he’s Chase’s.
It doesn’t bother me. I never loved Pat anyway. Yeah, he’s so handsome it drips off him, all my friends are jealous, it’s fun to show him off, but that’s about it. I’m his cover, and in return he gives me anything-everything-I want. I have my own fun, but it’s deep under cover, just like his.
I only ever saw them together once. Not too long after we got married. Did you ever wonder why Pat made such a big deal out of proposing? He had pictures published and everything. Well, it wasn’t because we were so in love. Although I think we do a pretty good job of faking it. A Straw Couple.
Anyway, I came home early that time and as I walked through the front of the house I saw them. They were on the couch, making out. Chase was on top of Pat. His shirt was off and I could see that his body was pretty much what I thought it’d be like, slender, and pretty rather than handsome.
Anyway, they were kissing, really hard and deep, and Pat’s hands were on Chase’s back, then on his butt. Then he brought his hands around and started undoing Chase’s fly. I could hear them making little sounds and whispering to each other, and I could see the weight of Chase’s body on Pat’s. Then Pat’s hands slipped under Chase’s jeans, pushing them down, and caressing his butt. It was sexy. Like gay porn, you know? Two good-looking guys doing things to each other, how could that not be hot?
I saw Chase undo Pat’s fly, and lower himself down and start to move against Pat. Then, Pat’s finger, sliding inside of Chase. I thought, if I didn’t get out of there and they saw me, they would be so embarrassed. But it was hard not to look.
So I just stood there, peeking behind the wall, holding my breath. They were moving faster, and breathing hard, their eyes were closed. I could see their bodies getting more and more tense, and then Chase’s back snapped like a branch and Pat pushed up underneath him. They both groaned out loud, and I knew what was happening. Then I figured I better make my escape, while they were in la-la land and wouldn’t notice. I snuck back out of the house and didn’t come in again until the time I had originally said I’d be back. Chase was gone by then. I admired them for being so discreet, and I promised myself I’d be that way too, so nobody would be embarrassed.
They were really hot together, but you’d never know, would you? I think of it as being like a pearl. A real pearl is layers of mother-of-pearl over a plain old grain of sand. Pat and Chase have sort of the opposite-a core of sexy love covered up by many layers of fake normality. I’m the top layer right now. Would you think a newly married man, who had a reputation as a big-time womanizer, had a secret lover who was a man? No, you would think, “He must be so in love with her, he doesn’t even want to party any more, he’d rather go home to her.” You wouldn’t think he was stealing away with his teammate to make love. It’s really too bad they can’t be open about it. But if they did, their world would be destroyed. I think it’s silly that anyone even cares. Why shouldn’t they just be able to love each other, like they really do?
So that is where I came in. He knew he could trust me. He told me right up front this is how it’s going to be, and I said fine. So it works. Even though we’ve never even slept in the same bed together, never made love. You might think it makes me sad, but actually I’m happy. Happy for them, that they can at least be together. And I can’t lie, I’m happy for me, that I have such a great lifestyle. I can do what I want, as long as I keep it under wraps, and I’ll never have to worry about money again.
It’s pretty unreal, I guess. A Straw Life. But so what? Nobody would believe the truth anyway. And Pat and Chase can love each other just like they want to, courtesy of me, the Straw Wife.