Faith in Me
Title: Faith in me
By:
marleybanana/
mtfizz
Rating: PG
Pairing: Matt Holliday/Troy Tulowitzki (Colorado Rockies)
Disclaimer: NOT. REAL.
Summary: The list just keeps getting longer, and Troy's not so alone.
A/N: I've been wanting to write this fic for a while now, and just hadn't been able to. Well, tonight, that ended, and here is the result. Title and inspiration from the song "Have a Little Faith in Me" by John Hiatt, covered by Mandy Moore.
x-posted to
mattroy (which, by the way, you should check out)
TFaith in me
Halfway there. Originally, when he'd heard the predictions, his heart had dropped into his stomach, and he'd gone a little light headed. Over two months. Seventy-one days. He was going to be stuck here, while the rest of the guys went out and tried to recapture whatever it was they'd had last fall, try to prove that it hadn't been some blessed fluke, and he wasn't going to get to help.
He thinks now, looking back, that it was that first week that had been the hardest. Moping around, watching his teammates, his best friends, take the field when he had to sit the bench. It made him antsy. It wasn't as bad when they were on the road. At least not as far as watching games went. Yes, he was at home, with only the view through a television screen to see what was happening, but it felt more detached. It was easier to keep himself from getting angry at his inability to help out.
As time passed, and he started getting healthy, things got easier. He was focused on the light at the end of the tunnel, rather than the length of that tunnel and it's unending darkness.
At the end of that first month, when Matt hurts himself, Troy has to resist the urge to laugh. Troy's no longer the only one of their starting roster on the disabled list, and it seems Matt has only joined the throng. Barmes, Hawpe, Speier, the list only gets longer as the season drags on, slowly, as the rest of the team can't seem to put it all together to win.
Troy recalls a night two weeks after he'd been hurt, the rest of the team was in Arizona, and he was left with only the phone to keep in contact.
"Man, this sucks," he sounds like a kid, and Matt's laughter like that of an older brother.
"Stop bitching," Matt replies. "If you'd focus more on yourself and what you're supposed to be doing and less on what the rest of us aren't doing well enough, maybe it wouldn't suck so bad."
"How can you be so easy going about this?"
"About what, losing? Troy, it'll happen. It'll all click, come together, and things will go back to the way they were. They always do. It's how this game balances itself out."
"You sound like an analyst."
Matt chuckles, warm and breathy in Troy's ear. "Miss you, man," he finally says.
"Yeah, you too." There's got to be other guys around. Matt would say more than that if he were alone. Laughter in the background proves Troy's suspicions right.
"Garrett says 'hey'."
"Yeah." Troy, in all his paranoia, thinks he feels some sort of camaraderie slipping away. He doesn't say anything to Matt, knowing Matt will only laugh and tell him he's imagining things. Troy needs that closeness. That brotherhood.
They talk a bit more, Matt never finding the solitude desired to say the things he needs, and Troy longing for Matt to say what he wants.
"See you in a couple days," Matt finally says.
Their goodbyes are jovial and light hearted, looking forward to the opportunity to be together when the team comes home.
When they did get back, Matt made sure to drop by Troy's place. Take a few hours to coddle him before Troy pushes Matt up against the wall, showing that he's feeling stronger than Matt thought, only partially favoring his leg, which finds a place between both of Matt's to keep him trapped.
By the end of the month, they're both stuck sitting the bench, watching the rest of the team lose games they should have won, and feeling just as bad about it all as the guys actually playing do.
The day Matt gets designated for his rehab assignment, to Triple-A Colorado Springs, he tells Troy with hooded eyes and a quiet tone.
Troy laughs out loud. "Great, when do they expect you to head back up to the big leagues?" he jokes.
Matt looks at him suspiciously. "You're taking this well."
"Dude. What am I gonna say? 'He can't leave me!'?" his voice reaches a pitch neither of them really knew existed with the last. "It's cool. I'll even come down and watch you play."
"You'll be mobbed by your groupies," Matt deadpans.
"Whatever, I'll wear a hat and sunglasses."
"If you're sure."
The night Matt's supposed to start his rehab assignment, they pull him from the lineup due to weather. He thinks he'll never hear the end of it from Troy.
"Guess they couldn't risk it with the 'golden boy'," he laughs when they're back at Troy's place, watching Sportscenter.
Matt just shoves him to the other end of the couch, a smirk playing on his lips as he listens to the announcers ramble on about the NBA Finals.
Troy knows Matt expected him to have problems being hurt this long. He knows everybody that pays any attention expected him to be going stir-crazy by the second week. Instead, he's only got a few weeks left, he's feeling good, and thisclose to being ready to be designated himself.
"They tell me I'm ahead of schedule," he tells Matt over the phone one night just after Matt's back with the rest of the team. They're playing in Chicago, and Troy wants nothing more than to be there.
"They've been telling you that for a month now," Matt sighs. "When are they expecting you back."
"End of the month."
"See you then," Matt jokes.
"Have faith, dude. I'm more awesome than you think."
"Yeah, 'awesome' has everything to do with it. I still think you just wanted to stay home. Lazy ass."
Troy laughs, the jokes continue. He'd been silly to think that an injury could take any of this away from him. He knows that Matt cares about him. He can tell in the way Matt's careful what he says about how they've played. It's only more obvious when Matt touches him.
They have their ups and downs. It's part of the game, part of life. The day he does return, it's to high fives and cheers, but he doesn't hear any of it. Matt's smile is enough to blind him, and there's nothing he would have liked to see more.
By:
marleybanana/
mtfizz
Rating: PG
Pairing: Matt Holliday/Troy Tulowitzki (Colorado Rockies)
Disclaimer: NOT. REAL.
Summary: The list just keeps getting longer, and Troy's not so alone.
A/N: I've been wanting to write this fic for a while now, and just hadn't been able to. Well, tonight, that ended, and here is the result. Title and inspiration from the song "Have a Little Faith in Me" by John Hiatt, covered by Mandy Moore.
x-posted to
mattroy (which, by the way, you should check out)
TFaith in me
Halfway there. Originally, when he'd heard the predictions, his heart had dropped into his stomach, and he'd gone a little light headed. Over two months. Seventy-one days. He was going to be stuck here, while the rest of the guys went out and tried to recapture whatever it was they'd had last fall, try to prove that it hadn't been some blessed fluke, and he wasn't going to get to help.
He thinks now, looking back, that it was that first week that had been the hardest. Moping around, watching his teammates, his best friends, take the field when he had to sit the bench. It made him antsy. It wasn't as bad when they were on the road. At least not as far as watching games went. Yes, he was at home, with only the view through a television screen to see what was happening, but it felt more detached. It was easier to keep himself from getting angry at his inability to help out.
As time passed, and he started getting healthy, things got easier. He was focused on the light at the end of the tunnel, rather than the length of that tunnel and it's unending darkness.
At the end of that first month, when Matt hurts himself, Troy has to resist the urge to laugh. Troy's no longer the only one of their starting roster on the disabled list, and it seems Matt has only joined the throng. Barmes, Hawpe, Speier, the list only gets longer as the season drags on, slowly, as the rest of the team can't seem to put it all together to win.
Troy recalls a night two weeks after he'd been hurt, the rest of the team was in Arizona, and he was left with only the phone to keep in contact.
"Man, this sucks," he sounds like a kid, and Matt's laughter like that of an older brother.
"Stop bitching," Matt replies. "If you'd focus more on yourself and what you're supposed to be doing and less on what the rest of us aren't doing well enough, maybe it wouldn't suck so bad."
"How can you be so easy going about this?"
"About what, losing? Troy, it'll happen. It'll all click, come together, and things will go back to the way they were. They always do. It's how this game balances itself out."
"You sound like an analyst."
Matt chuckles, warm and breathy in Troy's ear. "Miss you, man," he finally says.
"Yeah, you too." There's got to be other guys around. Matt would say more than that if he were alone. Laughter in the background proves Troy's suspicions right.
"Garrett says 'hey'."
"Yeah." Troy, in all his paranoia, thinks he feels some sort of camaraderie slipping away. He doesn't say anything to Matt, knowing Matt will only laugh and tell him he's imagining things. Troy needs that closeness. That brotherhood.
They talk a bit more, Matt never finding the solitude desired to say the things he needs, and Troy longing for Matt to say what he wants.
"See you in a couple days," Matt finally says.
Their goodbyes are jovial and light hearted, looking forward to the opportunity to be together when the team comes home.
When they did get back, Matt made sure to drop by Troy's place. Take a few hours to coddle him before Troy pushes Matt up against the wall, showing that he's feeling stronger than Matt thought, only partially favoring his leg, which finds a place between both of Matt's to keep him trapped.
By the end of the month, they're both stuck sitting the bench, watching the rest of the team lose games they should have won, and feeling just as bad about it all as the guys actually playing do.
The day Matt gets designated for his rehab assignment, to Triple-A Colorado Springs, he tells Troy with hooded eyes and a quiet tone.
Troy laughs out loud. "Great, when do they expect you to head back up to the big leagues?" he jokes.
Matt looks at him suspiciously. "You're taking this well."
"Dude. What am I gonna say? 'He can't leave me!'?" his voice reaches a pitch neither of them really knew existed with the last. "It's cool. I'll even come down and watch you play."
"You'll be mobbed by your groupies," Matt deadpans.
"Whatever, I'll wear a hat and sunglasses."
"If you're sure."
The night Matt's supposed to start his rehab assignment, they pull him from the lineup due to weather. He thinks he'll never hear the end of it from Troy.
"Guess they couldn't risk it with the 'golden boy'," he laughs when they're back at Troy's place, watching Sportscenter.
Matt just shoves him to the other end of the couch, a smirk playing on his lips as he listens to the announcers ramble on about the NBA Finals.
Troy knows Matt expected him to have problems being hurt this long. He knows everybody that pays any attention expected him to be going stir-crazy by the second week. Instead, he's only got a few weeks left, he's feeling good, and thisclose to being ready to be designated himself.
"They tell me I'm ahead of schedule," he tells Matt over the phone one night just after Matt's back with the rest of the team. They're playing in Chicago, and Troy wants nothing more than to be there.
"They've been telling you that for a month now," Matt sighs. "When are they expecting you back."
"End of the month."
"See you then," Matt jokes.
"Have faith, dude. I'm more awesome than you think."
"Yeah, 'awesome' has everything to do with it. I still think you just wanted to stay home. Lazy ass."
Troy laughs, the jokes continue. He'd been silly to think that an injury could take any of this away from him. He knows that Matt cares about him. He can tell in the way Matt's careful what he says about how they've played. It's only more obvious when Matt touches him.
They have their ups and downs. It's part of the game, part of life. The day he does return, it's to high fives and cheers, but he doesn't hear any of it. Matt's smile is enough to blind him, and there's nothing he would have liked to see more.