Year's End.... and New Year's beginning
The theme of the past year has been: Work
The theme of the past two years has been: Giving up old models
2011 was dominated by changes in my work life. It was all about decision-making and interviewing for the first 1/3 of the year, taking on new roles in the middle 1/3, and accepting new personal priorities (as relating to my career) for the final 1/3. My hope for 2012 is that the emotional heavy-lifting around my work life will ebb, and I will be free to address new things in its place.
It has been a good - but very weird - couple of years for me. I took the next natural step in my career, and realized that ambition will not hold up for me past a certain point. I am deeply grateful to those of you here who helped me to recognize that my life priorities and my career would never line up under the existing circumstances. Thank you again (and again) for your support. It was emotionally difficult to "escape" my most recent challenge and request a better placement at work, but your help was invaluable in helping me work through the transition to get there. Now my new role offers challenges I can look forward to, and which are a better fit for what I truly want in my daily life.
The other big change in models for me comes with my personal relationships. With only a small core of friends in the Bay Area, I realized a couple of years ago that I was far too heavily dependent on the person I had been seeing. It was cutting deeply into our relationship, and we made some major adjustments in reducing access (both practical and emotional) to one another to address that. The changes created more time for me to develop my own interests, including the woodworking class and the neighborhood-beautification project I volunteer for. It also created the opportunity for me to try dating - which has been alternately hilarious and confusing as I try to figure out what makes sense for me as a grown woman in her mid-30s.
My goals for the upcoming year are:
1) To work on ways to be a better friend. The ups and downs of the past few years have pushed me into a withdrawn sort of state (more deeply shy/introverted than in my 20s), and I often feel more socially awkward than I have in decades. Since fond silence over distance often presents similarly to not caring at all, I hope to relearn to be more expressive of my pleasure in people's company and my interest in their lives.
2) To clean out the accumulated clutter in my home, and restore it to its place as a welcome retreat from the world.
3) To laugh more and speak more among people I enjoy.
4) To take up knitting again.
5) To continue to learn and be curious about new things, giving me something to enjoy and to share with others as I go.
I hope that all of you have a wonderful and prosperous year in 2012. Thank you again for walking the journey with me!
The theme of the past two years has been: Giving up old models
2011 was dominated by changes in my work life. It was all about decision-making and interviewing for the first 1/3 of the year, taking on new roles in the middle 1/3, and accepting new personal priorities (as relating to my career) for the final 1/3. My hope for 2012 is that the emotional heavy-lifting around my work life will ebb, and I will be free to address new things in its place.
It has been a good - but very weird - couple of years for me. I took the next natural step in my career, and realized that ambition will not hold up for me past a certain point. I am deeply grateful to those of you here who helped me to recognize that my life priorities and my career would never line up under the existing circumstances. Thank you again (and again) for your support. It was emotionally difficult to "escape" my most recent challenge and request a better placement at work, but your help was invaluable in helping me work through the transition to get there. Now my new role offers challenges I can look forward to, and which are a better fit for what I truly want in my daily life.
The other big change in models for me comes with my personal relationships. With only a small core of friends in the Bay Area, I realized a couple of years ago that I was far too heavily dependent on the person I had been seeing. It was cutting deeply into our relationship, and we made some major adjustments in reducing access (both practical and emotional) to one another to address that. The changes created more time for me to develop my own interests, including the woodworking class and the neighborhood-beautification project I volunteer for. It also created the opportunity for me to try dating - which has been alternately hilarious and confusing as I try to figure out what makes sense for me as a grown woman in her mid-30s.
My goals for the upcoming year are:
1) To work on ways to be a better friend. The ups and downs of the past few years have pushed me into a withdrawn sort of state (more deeply shy/introverted than in my 20s), and I often feel more socially awkward than I have in decades. Since fond silence over distance often presents similarly to not caring at all, I hope to relearn to be more expressive of my pleasure in people's company and my interest in their lives.
2) To clean out the accumulated clutter in my home, and restore it to its place as a welcome retreat from the world.
3) To laugh more and speak more among people I enjoy.
4) To take up knitting again.
5) To continue to learn and be curious about new things, giving me something to enjoy and to share with others as I go.
I hope that all of you have a wonderful and prosperous year in 2012. Thank you again for walking the journey with me!