Fanfic: The 4400, The Clock On The Wall.
The Clock On The Wall
Fandom: The 4400
Pairing: Jordan/Shawn
Rating: PG-13. Or so.
Spoilers: Last episode for Season 2, "Mommy's Bosses".
Warnings: Slash.
Disclaimer: I don't own The 4400 or R-Evolve by 30 Seconds To Mars.
Author's Note: This takes place sometime after "Mommy's Bosses" and I'm not exactly sure if this counts as slash, but I'll just leave it at that anyway. Also, this is dedicated to sarahofearth, who's been an amazing reviewer of my 4400 fics on ff.net.
A revolution has begun today, for me, inside.
Defy yourself, just look inside the wreckage of your past.
The policy is set and we are never turning back.
- 30 Seconds to Mars, "R-Evolve."
Shawn does not let go of him after ten minutes.
The second hand ticks away, and soon the minute hand follows, and then shortly after that ten minutes becomes eleven minutes. And eleven minutes becomes twelve, and twelve turns into thirteen, and thirteen into fourteen.
Not that Jordan minds or even really cares, because of everything, Jordan now understands that Shawn needs him. But even more confusing and more so, he understands that Shawn doesn't need him. Because, perhaps, the test was not whether Shawn needed Jordan, but more that Jordan needs Shawn. And perhaps that is one of the only tests he had failed.
But for Jordan, it was never a matter of what he actually needed, it was always a matter of what he wanted. Because it goes without saying that Jordan Collier would get what he wanted, no questions asked. Now, that wasn't usually the way it actually went, but in most cases it seemed to be the truth.
Beside the tests and the what-he-wanted, Shawn was always the exception for the rule, even if he didn't want him to be. And even if he failed at making Shawn the exception, but in the end, Shawn was. Because, like and still unlike Jordan, Shawn always got what he needed, even if it was never really what he wanted to end up with.
And because fourteen minutes can turn into one hour and twenty-four seconds, Jordan still doesn't mind. Because even still, before tests or wanting or needing, Jordan understands so much more than he did before. And he knows that time really isn't the question, or the answer, or even on any test.
The only thing that really matters is that the clock on the wall can turn into ten minutes and fourteen minutes and one hour and then twenty-four seconds later and Shawn will still be holding onto him, and he'll still be holding onto Shawn.
The clock can turn into two hours or four, or five, or six, and that won't matter. And what's strange is that that's the thing that does matter, and that the reason that it matters is because it doesn't matter.
Because even after everything that's happened to the both of them, Jordan knows now, finally, that time could stand still, or it could keep on going until the both of them die. And he knows finally, that it doesn't really matter what time does, because even after time would end they would still be holding onto each other.
And they wouldn't really care about anything else because they'd already achieved in getting everything that they wanted and needed. And no clock nor time could stop them anymore.
Fandom: The 4400
Pairing: Jordan/Shawn
Rating: PG-13. Or so.
Spoilers: Last episode for Season 2, "Mommy's Bosses".
Warnings: Slash.
Disclaimer: I don't own The 4400 or R-Evolve by 30 Seconds To Mars.
Author's Note: This takes place sometime after "Mommy's Bosses" and I'm not exactly sure if this counts as slash, but I'll just leave it at that anyway. Also, this is dedicated to sarahofearth, who's been an amazing reviewer of my 4400 fics on ff.net.
A revolution has begun today, for me, inside.
Defy yourself, just look inside the wreckage of your past.
The policy is set and we are never turning back.
- 30 Seconds to Mars, "R-Evolve."
Shawn does not let go of him after ten minutes.
The second hand ticks away, and soon the minute hand follows, and then shortly after that ten minutes becomes eleven minutes. And eleven minutes becomes twelve, and twelve turns into thirteen, and thirteen into fourteen.
Not that Jordan minds or even really cares, because of everything, Jordan now understands that Shawn needs him. But even more confusing and more so, he understands that Shawn doesn't need him. Because, perhaps, the test was not whether Shawn needed Jordan, but more that Jordan needs Shawn. And perhaps that is one of the only tests he had failed.
But for Jordan, it was never a matter of what he actually needed, it was always a matter of what he wanted. Because it goes without saying that Jordan Collier would get what he wanted, no questions asked. Now, that wasn't usually the way it actually went, but in most cases it seemed to be the truth.
Beside the tests and the what-he-wanted, Shawn was always the exception for the rule, even if he didn't want him to be. And even if he failed at making Shawn the exception, but in the end, Shawn was. Because, like and still unlike Jordan, Shawn always got what he needed, even if it was never really what he wanted to end up with.
And because fourteen minutes can turn into one hour and twenty-four seconds, Jordan still doesn't mind. Because even still, before tests or wanting or needing, Jordan understands so much more than he did before. And he knows that time really isn't the question, or the answer, or even on any test.
The only thing that really matters is that the clock on the wall can turn into ten minutes and fourteen minutes and one hour and then twenty-four seconds later and Shawn will still be holding onto him, and he'll still be holding onto Shawn.
The clock can turn into two hours or four, or five, or six, and that won't matter. And what's strange is that that's the thing that does matter, and that the reason that it matters is because it doesn't matter.
Because even after everything that's happened to the both of them, Jordan knows now, finally, that time could stand still, or it could keep on going until the both of them die. And he knows finally, that it doesn't really matter what time does, because even after time would end they would still be holding onto each other.
And they wouldn't really care about anything else because they'd already achieved in getting everything that they wanted and needed. And no clock nor time could stop them anymore.