Sinking ever so slowy.
Thats what my heart is doing. Why? My last updated stated it perfectly. Why do I have a horrible feeling that I am losing her. I honestly think I am. As every day passes and every heart renchihng conversation that takes place, Her heart takes a piece of me out. Slowly, I will no longer be there and ill be just some other guy she dated...no feelings lost, cause im not in the heart anymore. On the other hand, my heart is sinking throung the floor cause its filled with her and shes causeing so much mental pain. It hurts, it really does. I wanna cry so badly...I just want to cry her out of my life sometimes. I know that sounds horrible but, if i did that my heart wouldnt be hurting so much. Every no conversation brings something new to the table. I guess it was bound to happen. She was bound to prove history wrong. But it sounds like its gaining the upper hand and will soon win. Its inevtiable that more than a kiss is going to happen. It may have, I doubt it, but I dont know that. I have to rust her. Last time we were apart something terrible happend. So just about all trust has gone away. I know I should trust her more, but i cant bring myself to it. The whole fact that she goes to i dont know how many parties a week. To be honest im just about in tears and cant write anymore. This is something that she needs to decide. It her problem, her solution.