01 Flag

[thebestnation]

[Filtered to "family"]

Well, I slept well! Now time to-wait…what the hell?! Where is this?

That’s not…no. That’s definitely not me. It can’t be. I don’t have children! OR A HUSBAND!

[Public]

ALRIGHT! WHO’S BRIGHT IDEA WAS THIS!? I know someone had to have come up with it, or I wouldn't be here!

Ha Ha its so funny. Really now, the jokes over. I mean

Comments

[kol_shevik]

Да, comrade! America is far behind, even in tiny little houses.

[thebestnation]

[...]

But I'm right here!

[kol_shevik]

...Does little comrade mean in Mayfield town? Да. You are.

[thebestnation]

No. You said America was far away, but I'm right here.

Still, knowing the name of this place is helpful.

[1/3]

[kol_shevik]

Да, America is far behind Ru--

[2/3]

[kol_shevik]

[A long, awkward pause.]

[3/3]

[kol_shevik]

[O-oh, he must simply be mishearing.] You are in house with little America? Mm, I am sorry, comrade. You are welcome to join Soviet Mayfield if cannot take his disgusting capitalism.

1/2

[thebestnation]

No. I am America!

2/2

[thebestnation]

Soviet Mayfield!?

[kol_shevik]

Has vodka changed hearing? You are American, little comrade? You should speak into phone clearer!

[thebestnation]

[God Russia, you're making her want to bang her head against a wall 8|]

I am speaking clearly! Do I have to spell it out for you?

I.

AM.

AMERICA.

[1/2]

[kol_shevik]

[He's pretty talented like that. Have some more.]

Ah, please hold on for a moment, little comrade Russia is feeling a-[He puts down the phone, wandering off to find something.]

[kol_shevik]

[HEAVY BREATHING.]

окей! I am back! I do not have plugs in ears. Now you can say again?

[thebestnation]

I.

AM.

AMERICA.

[1/2]

[kol_shevik]

[COMPLETELY AND UTTER SILENCE.]

[2/2]

[kol_shevik]

[Incredibly loud burst of laughter that sounds a bit like KOLKOLKOLKOLKOLKOL--]