Weasley Legacy 2.1
Hmmmm. I don't know about you guys, but it's looking like Charlie's a little.. disgruntled about his triple-licious fatherhood?
And Lucy really doesn't care about anything except staring outside of windows.
Except not really, because she's a kickass parent!
How to Be a Kickass Parent, Lucy-Style:
Make your child airbone!
...And promptly dump them on the floor!
Attempt to befriend your demon stepspawn!
...And then wet your pants.
This concludes HOW TO BE A KICKASS PARENT, LUCY-STYLE!
Oh, one more thing. Swoon over your fiancee as much as possible!
Lucy: Excuse you, bitch! I don't see you handling any offspring!
Felicia really has inherited Edith's SHARPGIRL! status. TEETH THAT CUT THROUGH YOUR CHIN!
Well, that's what power I want on my Facebook Superheroes application!
Really. This child has probably been stepped on more than once.
Felicia: EXCUSE ME. YOUR DEMON STEPSPAWN DEMANDS ATTENTION. I WILL CUT YOU UP.
What, will you gnaw through that as well, Felicia?
You know what? I'm going to make like FourFour's ANTM Recaps and make a crying count for this crazy family.
So this is what, #5?
#6.
CHARLIE WEASLEY IS THE GREATEST SIM OF ALL TIME! He freestyles autonomously!
I like to imagine that he's belting out some power ballad here.
And IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIeeeeeIIIIIIIIIIII will alwayssss loooove yoooooooooohooo
Charlie, look! Someone wants to be your friend!
Charlie: But he's so...so...so townie!
The Townie: YOU ARE, LIKE, SO UGLY. I MUST SHIELD MY EYES.
Charlie: Well, you're a townie. And I can freestyle better than any townie ANY. DAY.
Lucy: I'm just going to stand here...and be a decent parent inconspicuously...um...hey? Over here? I'm being a good parent?
Charlie: OKAY! I CHANGED MY MIND! WE CAN BE BEST FRIENDS FOREVER.
Charlie: We can frolic through meadows together, and have magical pillowfights, and and and...
The Townie(TT): Um, I was thinking of some illegal activities. Can we go steal some kids and get arrested for holding them hostage( HEYTHEREBRITBRIT)
I guess TT will just have to settle for oh-so-naughty pillow fights.
I know we're looking up her nostrils and all, but hello! Please get in my legacy!
Charlie: SHE'S A BITCH AND YOU TOOK ME AWAY FROM TT! WE WERE BFF's!
THANK YOU!
Here she is after a makeover. She's gorgeous.
Charlie: I changed my mind! We can be secret lovers now!
Are you noticing a trend with Charlie here? Like, massive mood swings?
TT2(Alicia, actually): AAAAAAACK
Crying Count: #7 and #8.
Oh, lovely. The other woman is a narcissist.
I really think this should count as Crying Count #9, but I think it's just scary. Whatever, I'm counting it anyway.
Ah, here's a real cry! #10! Infused with extra DEMONSPAWN! for your pleasure.
YES! No more babies to leave on the floor to rack up the Crying Count!
Isabel.
Lena.
Oh, and demonspawn, aka Felicia, aged too. She wasn't really worthy of a birthday cake or anything. She'd probably gnaw her way through the fork and plate anyway!
Her eyes scare me.
Maybe I should lay off on the demonspawn talk? I'm sort of scared.
Nevermind! She's a cute kid!
A cute kid who is OBSESSED WITH BUBBLES.
Good Simgod. But hey! Elf ears!
What, are you getting a bad trip from your bubbles?
Apparently. Poor baby.
WILL IT EVER END?
YES! A REAL TOY!
Nevermind! WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU ABANDON YOUR TOY, WEIRDO?
Well, if you'll at least dream of an activity other than bubbles...
Ah, I see now! Charlie just likes women who are in love with themselves!
I guess smelling Lucy's hair gets Charlie high? Look how his eyes are all squinty!
Why so distressed over a smelly child, Lucy? Oh, she smells? And you're in a bathroom?
Hmmm. Oh, #11.
What's got Lucy all hot and bothered?
...This.
Lucy: Your mustache! LET ME FEEL IT!
TT3: AAAAAAAAAAAACK
I see why he had the mustache. Maybe he can grow his emo hair bangs to cover it.
Lena is a sweet child.
But that's way too boring for Isabel! ISABEL MUST DESTROY!
Lena: OMG IT TASTES GOOD!
Isabel: You aren't tearing it apart properly. Here, you need to bite down on it really hard!
Maybe Isabel should have gotten Felicia's SHARPGIRL! teeth.
Maneaters.
What happened to the other woman, Charlie? People are watching!
...like this fellow!
Elvis Wannabe: I totally saw your father land his plane in your mother's...
Felicia:She totally isn't my mother.
Felicia: WAIT, WHAAAAAAAT?
Biker Chick Wannabe: I totally saw your father launch his rocket into..
Felicia: I AM NOT READY FOR SEXUAL INNUENDOS! I AM BUT AN INNOCENT CHILD WHO IS NOT EASILY CORRUPTED!
Please. You're a sim. You can be corrupted at any age!
Really, do you guys WANT to egg the townies on?
#12.
#13.
Really, the crying count is just a testament to how crappily I treat my sims. But whatever! It's entertainment!
I'm sure the townies were watching.
...And I guess Lena was, too! She cheered up immediately. I guess even toddlers can be corrupted.
Um, buddy? She lives in the same house as you?
He's making it quite hard for me to get in that gorgeous townie as The Other Woman. Romance Sim Failure!
I think he's trying to make his hands into a cockroach?
Maybe he's just a complete failure.
Forget the maybe.
HAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
HAHAHA
I DID NOT KNOW SIMS COULD DO THIS AND WHEN I SAW IT IT KILLED ME
Ahem. I mean, Charlie, FOR SHAME!
Ugh, damn you.
Charlie actually is a decent father. I don't take pictures because I'm way too busy taking pictures of him peeing into shrubs.
Birthday! And Lucy can only think about herself! I bet she could write an entire album of songs about herself. Quick, someone make a track listing!
Isabel.
Lena.
Lena is a total spaz and she runs EVERYWHERE.
And Isabel is...
...you guessed it. A BITCH!
"When I look at her, all I smell is just...bitch!"
Continuing the America's Next Top Model theme and all.
Double damn you.
Yes. Slap yourself. I can't handle any more sims!
Lena: Dad, some townie was telling me about how your plane landed in Mom's..."
Dad: YOU ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE CORRUPT YET, MISSY.
Felicia: Hey, guess what? I have superpowers! I CAN TELL YOUR FUTURE!
Isabel: Yeah, and I can see yours without a superpower. You're going to be the Queen of Putrescence! (NAME THAT MOVIE!)
Felicia: I hate you. If you are heir, I will make your life a living hell.
TRIPLE DAMN!
A girl. ANOTHER GIRL?
Anyway, her name is Julianna. Juliana? Who cares.
But who cares about babies? They're just left on the floor anyway!
She's really cute.
Isabel even watches TV in a bitchy pose!
Felicia: I can tell your future! You shall end up in jail!
Lena: OMGNOOO
Spaz.
Aw, well, at least Isabel has a friend in her toys.
See? He isn't a teeerrible father!
He's about to become a teeeeerrible husband, though.
DUUUNNNNNNDADUNDUN.
See what I mean?
So the Weasleys won't have the nice pretty defaults until about Generation 2.5. Ish. Which makes me sad, because they're gorgeous eyes! Oh, well.
ETA: OOPS! Totally forgot credit to dothesmustle and legacy_writers for, respectively, the founder and the challenge.